Random Thoughts

Blue & white crochet scarf

2011-05-05T19:28:00.006+01:00

Just to justify my absence during the long months of winter, this is what I have been up to. Crocheting and knitting! All those craft classes in school have finally paid off and I have discovered that I simply love the needles.

This scarf is the first one I crochet-ed (?-not sure how to put the verb) for my dear husband after having promised him one for nearly three years. Very true to his words, he wore it every single day to work and I was one proud wife.

I did search for several patterns before I decided to use simple basic stitches. As the colours were easy to mix, I just made-up a patterns as the scarf progressed. I wasn't very sure of a fringe at the end, but decided to go for a simple short fringe. The overall result is something I am still very proud!

Crochet skill level: Simple
Yarn : 6 oz of light blue, dark blue and white
Crochet hook: 4.5mm needle
Stitches used: Chain, single, double, fringe
Pattern: my own
Finished size: 15 rows, length app 75 inches

Just being me

2011-05-04T21:08:00.000+01:00

I have forgotten the feeling of being “me”, the one who is very different from the person who I am today. But then we all grow up and change and mostly change for the better. But at times, the ‘me’ of today misses the ‘me’ of yesterday and gives a very silent sigh.

Today, I am a wife and most importantly a Mother. Nothing in my life had prepared me to face this herculean task of being a ‘mum’. In every sense it’s an enriching experience and mostly an unconditional one. I wouldn’t change a thing about my life now but sometimes I feel lost. Maybe I have given so much in being a mum that I have forgotten myself. Sometimes, I keep wondering who am I ?

I used to be this person who dint lived in her own world, a little selfish in the ways most people are, fun, maybe a little daring, never too cautious, a tad of irresponsible, maybe a little arrogant, usually aggressive, but never scared, never weigh consequences, and most importantly self-centred.

Today, I am a very different person. I have given up everything that once was important to me to have a family and be a full-time mom. My fun mostly involves around running behind the little toddler. I weigh every decision I make and thread cautiously. I am docile and give in easily to the little pleas for cartoons or new toys but never once aggressive. I am very scared; scared for everything that might affect my little baby. Scared that she might fall down, scared that she might get a tummy bug, scared that something might hurt her, scared that world is very cruel, just scared that I won’t be able to protect her. I know every parent goes through this fear, my parents still do and now I understand why.

My world revolves around her little world. Every time she looks at me with her huge eyes, I fall in love with this little person who has changed my life and given me a new meaning to be ‘me’. Maybe this me is something I always wanted to be. I keep making false promises to myself that I would give more time for myself. But then, I rather watch Dora cuddling on the couch than watch Friends. Even my collection of old songs has been replaced by silly nursery rhymes. And I have been browsing for healthy food options than junk I love.

I do miss the old me, but I surely love the new me better. Its filled with special people who mean the world to me. For a change, I am not thinking of myself. I am trying to be a better person everyday. I am living the little dream I had for myself and reliving my life all over again.

Lappy comes home, finally

2010-12-18T19:46:00.000Z

It’s been nearly two years since RK fella’s lappy crashed big time. It was showing signs of retirement for a long while but since RK fella were adamant to keep it going much to the lappy’s disappointment, it had to crash. And what followed was a drama in itself and would take a few pages to explain. To cut the story very very short, all I will say is that RK fella was deeply immersed in sadness and the only thing that kept him going was the challenge of recovering all the data from his lappy. Since this wasn’t very easy, it kept him at bay and I had a few blissful days of being myself.

Anyway, I hadn’t seen it coming, but he claimed my lappy, my dearest lappy, and there was nothing I could do. I kept saying I dint approve of sharing my lappy, but he kept reminding me our wedding vows and what it meant. Now, I know we have to share things but lappy is not a thing, it’s my lappy! My first US pay check was converted into my dear lappy, a faithful friend of all these years. And now I had to share. Let’s say I wasn’t a very happy person adding to it was the fact that RK fella changed all the setting to suit him.

And share I did for nearly 2 years now with my fair share of complaints. It wasn’t easy to replace his old lappy, I do understand. It was his hard earned first UK pay check and friend of over 8 years. But seriously dude, 8 years is like pre historic when it comes to laptops but I truly understood. What I failed to understand was the waiting in every PC showroom, every other weekend, reviewing every other laptop and yet not being able to finalise on one. Amidst all this drama my lappy decided it had enough and threatened to blow up.

Finally, after nearly 2 years of mega lappy hunt, RK fella found his perfect lappy. I think it was one of the happiest days in my life; finally my lappy was truly mine all over again! It was time to celebrate.

But now his lappy is more powerful, more sleek, more stylish and more sexy, hmpf.

Old lappy makeover

2010-11-29T13:14:00.001Z

This is really strange for me. I am using the MS Word 2007 for the first time and I am utterly lost!

I so wish I had my old lappy back.

Not that this is a new lappy , Nah. It’s still my very dear old Dell lappy, my joy and pride. It is my first paycheck in US converted into a 15inch Media Centre Dell with Core Duo, a big thing then, way back in early 2006.

Anyway, I have been so faithful to my lappy that she’s been the centre of my existence for all these years. I had totally surrendered to her beauty and was always in awe of her powers on me. Now that Adhi has taken this place, lappy is the second best thing, um or should it be RK? ,Well, she always been an important part of my life and continues to be so. Maybe I associate her with the fond memories of my single-independent-irresponsible- life.

Now, RK fella had his own dear lappy which crashed several months back. Sad, hurt, senti RK never got around to replace his seriously old Toshiba waiting for the right model. In the meanwhile, he got to share my lappy much to my annoyance. The usual me would never have been this generous but since he keeps reminding me of our wedding vows, sharing being one of them, I had to give in. This was one huge mistake.

One fine day, last week, lappy just crashed. I think she had too much of us and could no longer take it. She refused to breathe and I was sick with horror. I had the back up in my external hard drive so nothing to worry about. But this was my Lappy, my dear old Lappy and she could not leave like this. Sigh, I thought this was it. Maybe it was time to get a new one.

Now this RK fella is a real weirdo. He is totally obsessive when it comes to repairing, be it bones or wires or even a carpet stain; he has to fix it. When I say ‘has to’, I mean ‘HAS TO’. So for two nights in a row he sat with a mission to get lappy back working. I still have no clue how he did it but apparently he is very proud of it and has been giving tips to anyone who is willing to listen. Now that we had my old lappy running, we had to reboot everything into it.

So comes the MS Office 2007 version. And so comes my agony of being lost.

Today

2010-11-01T21:12:00.000Z

It’s been a weird day today, a really strange one. I woke up to a dream wondering what the hell was happening. I took a few minutes to recall my dream and a few bits were still missing. Strangely enough, the bits came into place as the day progressed. I had a dream of today, the exact today!
Well, how could I? It never happens, not to me at least. I might have my déjà vu moments but they are like tiny-winy bits. Not a entire day enfolding in my dream.
Creepy.

Mr and Mrs Chipmunks

2010-10-22T13:56:00.000+01:00

We are neighbors. We have known each other for nearly 3 years now. Infact, they have been here for much longer than us. After all this time we have turned into real good friends, Mr. and Mrs. Chipmunk.

They live on the tree next to our building and use our balcony for all sorts of recreational activities. But they are the decent sorts; they don’t create havoc, make a scene or interrupt me in my activities. Infact they are much better neighbors than the many human neighbors we hear off.

We have an understanding relationship. I feed them in the morning and they entertain Adhi the whole day. That’s our deal. Adhi loves to watch them eat, jump, scratch or any of the squirrelly things they do and I love to watch her squeal with delight. For me, it’s just amazing to watch her excited at their silly antics. She can watch them for hours and give me an animated commentary in her own sweet incoherent language. And that’s a pure delight for any mom I think.

Anyway, Mr. and Mrs. Chipmunk are not the fussy kind either. They love groundnuts, which is not a surprise. But they love oatmeal too. Now that’s something you dint know.
They like bread toasted and also the bread sticks. They are a little choosey when it comes to biscuits but the bird seed is wiped out clean. Over these years I have learnt a pattern in their eating habits and try to feed them healthy delicious food. They also help me with any of the left over’s although they are not very keen on pizza.

I am even able to recognize them as Mrs. Chipmunk has got a fluffy tail and she keeps peeping through our windows. Now, that’s a very female-trait right? Being nosey.
Mr. Chipmunk is a gentleman. He waits for me to serve the food unlike his better half who keeps knocking at the glass or peeps until I bring out some food. Er, did I mention we have breakfast together? We indoors and they outdoors; but usually at the same time.

Now these couples are very social beings, occasionally they have a visitor, whom I call ‘cousin Chipmunk from the village’ who welcomes himself to the food I serve. Hes got a white patch under his tummy and that’s how I know he is visiting. I don’t fancy him much since hes not the friendly kind.

Anyway, Adhi is fanatically waving her hands at me and trying to sort-a-dance. She does that when she’s super duper excited. I guess the Chipmunks are keeping her entertained. They are indeed my loving neighbors, wish everyone has great folks like them living next door.

Just lost before mid-night

2010-10-21T23:38:00.002+01:00

There are some rare times in life when you just feel so lost, just so helpless and just so without a direction. I am going through that phase these days. And tell you, its not a very pleasant feeling. Its like a real long deserted road ahead, you are just walking and walking and walking, without a end in sight. There is nothing to look forward to and you are so tired and bored of walking that you just want to stop and take another road, maybe with a few trees or through a meadow or maybe by the sea. Sigh.

My life is really good, I am having fun being a mom, I am re-living my childhood again, I am seeing myself through my baby's eyes and its a wonderful experience. I wouldn't want to give it up for anything in the world. But I have lost the 'me' in the process. I am a 'mom' and not 'me'. Maybe its just one of my mood swings talking, maybe.

There was a time in my life when I knew exactly where my life was going. I knew what I would be doing the next day, the next week or the next month. I had the whole journey of my life planned, mapped and even sketched as a flow chart. I had my goals, a direction and a dream to chase. I was working hard to get there and make an niche for myself.

Now, I am in a boat stuck in the sands of a desert and just waiting for some waves to wash down miraculaously and push me forward. I need a map which will tell me where to go. I just dont know what I want of life. Maybe this is called mid-life crisis???

The basket maker

2010-10-20T10:17:00.000+01:00

In the modern era when ‘what I buy’ is ‘what you buy’ and ‘what you neighbor buys’ and ‘what her sister buys’, it is very refreshing to know that there are people who still believe in making a unique mark with their skills and creativity. One such person is Lee Dalby, the basket maker.

Going back to the nature and weaving up some real amazing baskets is something he has been doing for nearly 2 decades now. I was reading the Country Living mag where an article mentioned him and I was soon browsing for the details. This is what I found!

The Basket Maker

Not Marks & Spencer, not John Lewis, not Bhs, but an ancient art we are slowly forgetting. This would be something I would like Adhi to grow up appreciating, going back to nature.

My version of brownie fudge

2010-10-17T12:59:00.000+01:00

There are few things you just have to do when in Bangalore. And one of them is go to Corner House and eating ‘Death by Chocolate’ and maybe eat another one if you really fancy chocolate! Yum yum.

I just love DBC and when I was in Bangalore, I was a regular at the Corner House. But since it’s been over 4 years since my last visit I have been trying hard to find a remotely close replacement to DBC. I have a weak tooth for chocolate and I can never forget that tingling taste of DBC. So here’s the next best, my version of DBC, tried, tested and tasted over all these years!

Step one
You will need Ben and Jerry’s- Chocolate Fudge Brownie ice-cream.

Step two
You will need ASDA’s Chocolate Brownie (made from pure butter and milk chocolate).

Step three
Take two brownies in a bowl and microwave for 40secs or until you see the brownie sizzle.

Step four
Scoop the delicious Ben & Jerry ice cream into the bowl.

Step five
Relax on the couch with a nice movie and the brownie fudge!

Hungry ramblings

2010-10-14T21:32:00.001+01:00

I have a few minutes to spare before I get to my wifey duties of serving dinner, cleaning, watching ‘Big Bang’ and reading Cosmo. So I will make a random entry.

In the past few months I have been so lazy to follow-up with everything I have started, facebook, orkut, twitter, blogger, you name it, I have goofed up. It’s been very different ever since I got married. It’s been even more different ever since I became a mother. I have been exposed to the blissful life of a housewife; the ones who host dinner parties, attend kitty parties, go shopping, gossip about celeb-affairs, read Cosmo and watch home make-over shows. Yeah, also add stroll around the parks, have tea gathering and take picnics on weekdays! For all the years I was studying and working like a lunatic I never knew this part of the world ever existed. Now that I am here, I am just making the most of it, you can’t blame me.

Anyway, being a mom must be the most wonderful job on earth. Atleast I think so. I am re-living my childhood again and watching myself grow all over again. Nothing compares to the joy and happiness Adhi brings in my life. Every single day is a new beginning and a new learning. There is nothing more I could ever ask for in life.

I guess I am hungry and just rambling pointless. Not that anything I have posted before had any point. But I need to set an example for my daughter and I am trying to be sensible. So I will just go back to the dishes and cleaning mode and come back when I have a point to make? Also, Big Bangs starts now.

A journey to the surface of the earth

2010-10-13T22:06:00.000+01:00

Today is a historical day, not for me personally, but for mankind in general. October the 13, 2010 will go down in history as the miraculous day when 33 miners trapped under the San Jose mine for 69 days were rescued from 2000ft under the earth. It is a miracle nevertheless as it’s the first time in the history of mining that people are rescued after such a long time and from such a depth. It happens only in Jules Verne fictions and movies, not in real life and never in this scale.

I doubt if I would have ever got the motivation to make an entry again in bloggy if not for today. I have been up since morning, watching the live telecast, brilliantly broadcasted by BBC News and wonderfully shot by the Chilean Government. I think they knew the world was waiting for today and everyone would rejoice and share in the happiness to have all the 33 miners safe, back on the surface. It was a victory for mankind.

Well, it has been very emotional day for me; to watch every miner come out of that capsule, give sigh of relief, the joyous face of the loved ones, cheering from all the rescue workers, the hugs tears, kisses and the happiness. It is very touching to see these men embrace their loved ones and have a great relief that everything will be ok. Every smile around them welcomes them to a second chance at life.

Every miner rescued looks in great shape, great physical shape for someone who has been trapped deep under for over 2 months. Also, the discipline they displayed, no chaos what so ever, absolutely brilliant. They have had over 2 months to dream of today and it’s finally here, and they are relishing every moment of being alive, a second chance at life, a blessing from god, efforts of everyone involved, just being ‘here’. Who would have thought on August 5th that today was possible? Who would have thought that men would be rescued from 2000ft under the hard granite mine? Who thought the initial 17 days of trauma would be soon forgotten?

What surprised me the most was the presence of the President, Sebastian Pinera and the first lady from midnight, when the first rescuer was sent below to the group of waiting miners. His presence truly speaks for itself indeed. He has been there all day long, maybe with a few hours of sleep in-between, but been there under the sun, welcoming every miner, hugging them and truly celebrating every miner’s safe return. Kudos to him!

Another person who has been there all day long is the Mining minister Lawrence Golborne, No sleep since this mission began, in chilly weather, in the hot sun, he’s been there in every sense. His face has been one of the happiest today as he sees every man coming out, every family being reunited, every miner hugging him and what a proud moment for him!

One of the people who deserve a lot of credit is the Chief Engineer of this rescue mission, Andre Sougarret. He has been there for 69 days, literally leaving no stone unturned in getting these 33 miners out in good condition. This surely must be the greatest achievement of his life to rescue these trapped miners and give them a second chance in life. And yes, his teams of wonderfully dedicated rescue members who have worked to their best, to get everyone out to safety. Hats off to these guys! Truly commendable.

Its great to see each one emerging, what a moment! I have to admit that I have been senti several times, watching these happy moments. I keep wondering the emotions that the wife, mothers, children of these miners must be experiencing. For 69 days they have been waiting for this moment, to hug their loved ones, the only hope that kept them going, the only hope that kept the family members going too. Camp Hope has truly lived up to its name. This mission has been the most elaborate rescue mission ever and its joyous to see that it’s a success.

As I type, 25th miner has just been rescued and the capsule is on its way to complete its mission. We have 8 more to go and not to forget the 2 paramedics who have been there making sure this mission progress as smoothly as planned. Finally, in few hours the horrible two months of anticipation and long wait will come to an end. Truly, a wonderful day for everyone, especially for the miners and their loved ones and indeed a very proud moment for Chile.
Celebrations!!

My little cuddle bear

2009-11-02T19:20:00.000Z

Just a tad of global warming

2009-10-30T11:57:00.000Z

I really wish I could relax with my feet up, hot cup of tea in one hand, some rich tea biscuits in another and “Friends” running back-to-back on the big tele. That’s the big part, “wish”, “kaash” and the like of yearning words. Instead, I am balancing on the couch with lappy, craning my already sore back to type, straining my eyes to see in this dark, and Adhi snoring on my lap. Not a very “wish” type of evening I say. Although the little body snuggling close to me gets a few kisses every few seconds and some loving squeezes, I need a break.

Summer was fun, no doubt. I made the most of it by hardly being at home. But this winter is not fair, it sucks big time. It’s dark when you have your breakfast and dark when you have your evening tea. Its dark, dull, cold and sad all the time. And this is just the beginning. Sigh, I wish my India trip would soon materialize.

These days I realize, I am worried a tad too much about global warming thingy. Everytime I watch tele, use the washing machine, shower or anything that evolves me leaving an ugly CO2 footprint, I am worried. I worry what might happen to the future generation, what might happen to the planet and most importantly, what will happen to my Adhi. Yeah, I think Adhi is the root cause of all my worries these days. I can worry about her eating little, sleeping too much, pulling things and even not pooing on time. But since I have nothing much better to do, I am happy that I am “worrier” at mind. How cool is that?!

So, we had one of Adhi’s little friend for lunch yesterday, a very cute little fella. He was a real sweet chap, just 10 months old and very calm compared to Adhi’s hyper self. Adhi was all over him trying to pull his hair and giving some real sloppy wet kisses and he was enjoying all the attention and was trying to kiss her back. His mom and I were really enjoying the baby acts but we got a little worried if this would happen after 20 years? I better not think of this now, I have enough of global warming worry to do right now.

I have been going to the library more often now, with the story time, nursery rhyme time and book time. Its fun and I get to read lot of books. I wonder why these things don’t happen in India. There is so much importance given to learning and love for reading from such a young age. I see the little kids go to school here, and they hardly carry 2 books as all learning is done through games, fun, music and more fun. I remember, I used to carry half the donkey’s weight in my school bag and come back with the constitution size homework. I don’t this US also has this kind of activities for children and babies and adults. We even have family activities on weekends for parents to get involved in all the fun.

I want to write so much more, but its meal time for Adhi and soon she will be screaming the roof off if I don’t feed her. That reminds me, I read somewhere that if you exercise, you leave big big big CO2 footprint. See, this gives us all a valid excuse to be lazy!

Pointless mumbling of empty me

2009-10-08T21:18:00.000+01:00

I am writing this post because I have nothing else to do. I am absolutely bored and tired of not doing anything from past 20 mins. My mind is as empty as the plots of many hindi movies. The ones which are made just because some guy sitting on the big chair had some black money, wanted to make white, had a girlfriend free to act and everything else was grey? Ditto, I am in such a state right now so I thought why not write something totally pointless.

I don’t mean that anything I have written all these years had a point anyway, but this is like the whopper of pointless me. I am done with cooking, done with cleaning, Adhi is sleeping, no one seems to scrap me on orkut, no one is online (some people hid with invisible status too), and I am bored checking random sites and reading news. I can watch TV, but since I have pledged towards reduced carbon footprint, I see TV only if there are more than 2 people watching it. And also, nothing sensible comes in these angrezi channels anyway. None of the saas are evil, infact most of the serials have no saas; bahus don’t dress up in kilos of sona or make-up, well, bahus don’t “dress up” in the first instance and no one dies or has a rebirth. Hence, its not much fun. There are sitcoms from US but I must have watched each one like a zillion times that I can narrate most of dialogues.

I have been reading a lot of parenting books lately and applying for all the competitions. I haven’t won any so far, I think they are playing racism card. That’s one way of telling ‘I wasn’t good macha’ in a very diplomatic way. The best part of being in this country is, we get lot of free magazines sent to us just like that. I like to see the pictures, colours, people and the words. Not that I really read any of them, just flipping through the pages is fun.

Since I was mega bored, I tried to see all the old blog I used to read. Amazing, many of them have been idle for ages. I guess each one is busy with their life. Most of the people there were my classmates. So I know for sure they are busy with their life. Since we no longer mail each other, we make a point to call or chat or sometimes juts ‘think’ of them. Yeah, that’s how life has changed. Then we all had time and money to go out, meet, watch movies, have dinners and just do nothing. Now, we are spread across different continents, settled, many of us have a baby, and yes, many of us are married too and not much of money. I guess most of the money goes in mortgage or baby nappies. Maybe when we are old, and lucky enough not to be dead, we might have the reunions again.

I am generally worried these days. It ranges from global warming to old age to death to pollution to energy crisis to Adhi. I know, since I am jobless and nothing runs in my empty mind, worrying is the old decent thing I can do. Infact, if anyone wanted to employ a “worrier” in their dept, I would top the list. Anyway, I am planning to include this thing in my new year’s resolution. My last year’s resolution said I wont buy any news watches or glasses for a whole year. And I have been good with that except for a mega expensive diamond stud watch RK fella gifted me to tick off all the ungiven gifts of last 2 years and next 2 years.

Since I am talking pointlessly, I think I am wasting energy here. Right. I need to reduce my carbon footprint and so does everyone else. So I think I will just sit back empty minded and get back to my worrying business.

A lazy naptime

2009-09-30T15:16:00.000+01:00

Ever had this feeling?

You are in deep sleep; you feel someone is knocking your head, pulling your hair, scratching your face, licking your nose and trying to climb all over you?

That explains how I wake up every morning from my deepest slumber and how my dear Adhi lovingly wakes me up. I love to see her little smiling face the first thing in the morning, but I would have loved my stars better if she dint wake up at 5 every morning. I think she takes “early to bed, early to rise” phrase much seriously than I think.

She just completed 6 months and already has me running behind her all the time. I wonder how it will be when she’s 16. At 6 months when most of the little babies in her baby-group are just rolling over and trying to crawl, my little puppet is crawling all over the place, sitting all by herself and standing! Yes, standing.
Yeah, that should make any mommy proud of the little tot but when the mommy concerned has to glue herself to the toddler at all waking times; it gets a little too tiring.

She loves to pull random things and watch them fall. I am not sure how it entertains her, but she surely has peels of laughter afterwards. And don’t I just love watching her laugh like that. So I end up keeping all the things back just to let her pull them again. Only my lappy wasn’t very happy with her trying to pull him down, tug at his cord and real wet licks all over him. Well, what she wants; she gets!

Right now she is sleeping all peaceful and waiting for her to wake up. It’s fun to see her crawl excitedly when she sees something new. She is just learning to explore her little world and seeing the world from her eyes is much more colorful. Everything looks so big and amazing and yes, everything has to be tasted; be it chair or carpet or leaf or toy.

Her meal times are the most difficult ones. The pureed food flies all over the place before landing in her mouth. After thirty minutes of struggling, I manage to feed her a few spoonfuls and end up with a bunch of laundry. I do that 3 times a day, so soon I can be a proper Dhobi!

My life is all about little Adhi now. Its surprising at times, how such a little baby can change our lives forever. RK fella and I get mega jealous of each other when she showers her attention on either. We want all of that sloppy kisses, those tiny little hugs and that the little feet climbing over us. Man! she does get into kissing mood and then she wont stop until we start tickling her.

Sigh, here she wakes up.

Even I am R E(a) D

2009-08-28T19:46:00.001+01:00

WOW!!! REALLY WOW!!!

This is what I said to myself, loud, real loud.

I just saw the last comment on an old post, clicked on the link of the blogger and there was my name! Nope, I don’t lie when I am licking the chocolate cookie; really, there is my name!

http://swathyk.blogspot.com/

(I guess, I need to ask this blogger to send me a fee for the cheap publicity I am doing, but really, I am not sure how many people do visit here these days, so I will let it go)

There was a time, long long ago, when the earth was young and so was I, when this dear bloggy of mine was updated every single day. Every bit of my insane antics was recorded here and every not-so-decent thought was mentioned. Those were my golden days of stupidity when I was simply ‘me’. Then, many jobless people like me, who dint have anything better in the office or life used to visit each other’s blogs, post real encouraging comments and feel good that there were not-so-normal people like us too. I used to get some real nice comments from real generous friends and some ‘grrr-you-idiot’ emails from a few cousins. Yeah, they thought genetically I was from a different species altogether.

It was ‘then’ not ‘now’. Then it was posts everyday, something funny everyday. Now its simply me, a almost domesticated, meow meow kinda me. Remember? I had to give up all my normality, taporigiri to marry the RK fella? I had to renounce my ‘Harleydada’ title to take up ‘mom’ thingy. The point is, (yeah, I deviate a lot) I don’t update my blog often now. I sometimes totally forget about it until I see I have a lappy too! But with Adhi around, I have forgotten ‘me’ too. Its all about her now. So, I don’t update my blog, don’t read others and never post comments.

Anyway, when this is the ‘now’ thingy, someone actually reads me, comments too, and then even adds me on her list. I am totally gob smacked. Thanks a lot, my day is made and I will eat one more for cookie for your sake. I am trying to cut down on calories you see.

But for now, I am totally WOW!!!

Adhi completes 5 months

2009-08-27T10:18:00.000+01:00

Adhi completes 5 months today!

My little princess is five months today and I still cant believe how fast she is growing. It seems like just yesterday a tiny little Adhi came into our life, and now after 5 months, I cannot remember our life before her or without her. She is the sunshine of our life, our dream and everything we ever wanted.

Right now, she is cooing to herself, trying to lick her feet, looking at the ceiling and possibly having an amazing conversation. I never know! Everytime she seems to be by herself, she will be totally engaged in similar acts. And sitting in the living room with a cup of hot coffee, I am a beaming proud mother.

Life has changed post Adhi. It’s been crazy, busy, funny, happy, and a smoothie of many mixed emotions. If I am on cloud nine when she learns a new trick, next minute I am in tears because I am tired to shreds. At times, I am hoping she will sleep soon and within minutes I am waiting for her to wake up. She is the center of my life and everything I do or say revolves around her.

When someone calls me, I just can’t get enough of telling them about her. For me, she is the most perfect baby anyone has ever seen! And everything she does is the best thing ever happened to the whole of mankind. I guess that’s why they say that mother’s love is unconditional. I just want to give the best of everything to her and she should have every joy I could ever offer. If I think I spoil her, RK fella is even worse. Since he gets less time with her, he makes the most of every minute.

The best part for me is the special smile she gives me. Whole world gets her cute smile but I get her most special smile. That makes my day to know that she thinks I am the best. Even when RK fella is amusing her with his funny noises and faces, her little eyes look for me. When I am around, her tiny arms reach out for me to pick her up. And when I am playing with her, she gives her little feet for a few kisses. It’s just amazing how a little doll can make you dance to her coos. I am ready to do anything silly and funny to make her laugh.

I could go one ranting and raving about my little cutie but its time for her bath. And then we are going to the play group to meet other tots.

Rainy day mumbing

2009-06-05T15:56:00.001+01:00

I wake up in the morning; brush my teeth, dream of a lovely hot cuppa and then Adhi dear wakes up. There goes my morning breakfast.

I prepare a nice steaming, spicy burger for myself, top it with lemon-pepper corn, also plan for a nice hindi movie, and Adhi wakes up.

I plan to write a blog post, think of the exact words I want to type, sit with my lappy, and yeah, Adhi wakes up.

This has been my life ever since my Mom flew back to India last week. I never get to complete the task at hand or task in mind. Being a mom has been the most demanding task of my life. Right now, I am rocking Adhi to sleep, balancing the lappy on one lap and typing with one hand. I am so multi-tasking! And yes, I am watching Jaane Tu and trying to comprehend what in the world is this story about.

Adhi has been a very good baby these days. She smiles, tries to talk, plays and makes me feel really special. She thinks my voice is the sweetest, I am the prettiest and I am the most wonderful person on earth. Not that she told me all this, but I just love to assume things myself. But yes, she does talk to me all day in her lovely little baby talk. And these days, we have been enjoying each other’s company to the max which has left the RK fella quite unsettled.

Also, I have been working on a scrap book for Adhi. It’s a nice big book I am filling with little memories for Adhi and myself. Less for Adhi and more for myself, actually. When Adhi grows up, gets married, has her own family, and I am still alive (I doubt that with the curses I have credited in my life account), RK fella and me, old, grey hair, glasses, walking stick, will relive all the lovely memories and feel proud of our little girl. Hence, I have been spending the little available time on this book. It has to be really special you see.

And have you ever felt this? You meet a person for the first time and feel that you have known them all your life? You both click so well that end up chatting for hours and laugh at nothings like best friends? Well, I have met a neighbour who is of my age, and we have just clicked! Now we have tons of nothings to talk about.

Well, Adhi is up and wants to play. I have two options, either post this now or keep it pending for few more weeks. I think I will opt for the former choice. Here we go, its Adhi time now.

Adhi, thy name

2009-05-23T12:05:00.000+01:00

I must have been some 12 years old when I decided my baby’s name would be Adhi. It was to be A-A-D-H-I, stressing on the ‘aa’ part. Simple. I don’t know why I came up with this name or why at that age I was thinking of my baby. I loved to play house-house game with my friends, I used to be the mom, and I wanted my baby to be Adhi.

Years passed by, I grew up but the name stuck with me. My baby would be Adhi, I dint care if it was a boy or a girl. Nah, that wouldn’t matter anyway, will it? Baby girl would mean living my dreams and seeing my childhood all over again and having a new little friend, life would be wonderful!

Baby boy would be fun, super fun, minus all the pretty dresses and dolls. It would be guns, video games, bikes and all the macho stuff at home. Life would still be wonderful and eventful.

So, for all my life, I stuck with this name. I even told RK fella that our baby would just be Adhi. There would be no discussions, no arguments and no second thoughts.
Now, this RK fella is a man with very few words and loads of thoughts. So he giving an ‘hmm’ response could mean anything from OK to lets see to NO. Anyway, I wasn’t to care about what he thought. After all, I have spent all these years on Adhi.

At my 21 weeks scan I was told that I was carrying a baby girl. Now, I was overjoyed and sad at the same time. All the frills, laces, pretty dresses, lovely curls, she would be my little princess. And sad because-what would happen to ‘Adhi’???

For the next few weeks RK fella and I hunted every website, every name base for a nice name. Nothing seemed to get a nod from both. I had very definite wants with the name.

1. The name should be in Sanskrit
2. It should have a Vedic meaning
3. It should be very unique
4. No one whom I know should have the name
5. It should begin with ‘AA’

RK fella wasn’t too happy with the name starting from A. He said it was too common and baby might be the first on the attendance register. So it was a definite NO from him.

He had very simple want-it should have his name and my name in it. Hence he came up with ‘Radha’. Now, Radha is a nice name, really nice. But dude, how happy will our Radha be when she is 21??? She might even put us up for adoption. I was totally against it. My baby won’t be called Radha- I said NO.

Then we finally agreed on Himali, after Himalayas. It was a nice name, we both agreed, easy to pronounce, easy to write, and it sounded sexy; Himali! That was it. For the next four months, she was Himali to us.

Then, one fine morning, I got a text from RK fella;

You want ‘AA’-I say ‘NA’
I want ‘Radha’-you say ‘NA’
So A-RADHA-NA!!!

Hmm, the Rajesh Khanna-Sharmila Tagore wala Aradhana??? I loved all the songs from that movie! It was a nice name no doubt; very old one, unique, started with ‘aa’, had vedic meaning, was in Sanskrit, and no one I knew had that name. But wasn’t it too long?
What’s more, we could still call her Adhi!!!

And the same morning I went into labour and our little Aradhana was born!

On being a Mom

2009-05-21T10:40:00.000+01:00

Thou shalt not ever trouble thy Mater
Thou shalt not ever question thy Mater’s pearls of wisdom
Thou shalt not take thy Mater’s advice lightly
Thou shalt consult thy Mater at every step
Thy Mater is always right

I have been a Mom only for 2 months now, but already taken a resolution- never, never to trouble my Mom ever again. I am still left in great astonishment how my parents raised my bro and me. Every single day, I am left wondering and speechless on how tolerant and loving my mom has been for all these years and still is! Raising two of my types (read bro and me) for all these years must be hell lot of a job. Specially, when troubling parents seemed to be the only aim of our existence. And therefore, I think every mom deserves a Nobel Peace award.

Oh yeah, trust me. It took me 26 years of my life (I know I am not supposed to disclose my age, so please forget it) to understand what it is to be a mother. In two months, I have gone through so many emotions, from sheer happiness and joy to utter desperation and anger. Each day is a new story and a new learning. Being a mother must be the biggest learning of all and nothing that one has read or heard will ever prepare you for the actual thing.

Now, my little Adhi is a real good baby. Everyone says so. She does only 4 things; cry-feed-poo-sleep. And she does that in cycles. Now you think that’s nothing? True.
But when each little act from her requires me to spend considerable amount of my energy, it leaves me totally drained and uh-oh.

When she cries, she makes such a sad face that the mamta in me comes overflowing. Now, I am not a heartless person to leave that little angle crying, am I? But when this little baby cries for hours through out the day, all my mamta drains, evaporates and I am left close to pulling my hair and yours, if you were around.

Feeding looked like an easy task at first, but now, the feed goes on for ever. At the same time, there is a bit of crying, bit of pinching, bit of beating legs, etc. And this happens nearly every hour of day and luckily a few times at night. And I forgot to mention, after ever feed I need to burp Adhi a few times too.

Discussing poo is not something I have ever done before I had Adhi. But then, motherhood opens doors to many things in life which we have never done before, doesn’t it? So, yes, poo and wee are the other two things on my daily agenda. According to my midwife, I need to worry about the soiled and wet nappies. So my daily math is restricted to the counting of nappies.

Sleep-don’t I wish I could have an uninterrupted sleep for a few hours? Anyway, making Adhi sleep requires cooing-singing-humming-patting-stroking-bouncing-and any other baby sleeping antics you can think of. Then, don’t you dare make a sound else a shrill cry will just make you want to stuff a whole pillow into your ears.

All this activity is also accompanied by oil massage, bathing, dressing, playing etc. Most of them accompanied by crying or pooing or sleeping or feeding. So, get the picture???

Yes, that’s how my days have been in the past two months. I never get to finish the task at hand, I never get to eat on time, I never get to sleep uninterrupted, I never get time to read, and I never get MY time. It took me three days to write this post and even when I was thinking, my thoughts were interrupted. Phew- a double phew!

But, for me, every minute with Adhi is precious. Every little activity is a big learning process and I know I am getting there. We are learning and growing together; she as a baby and me as a mother. I am also learning to appreciate what my mother did for me with much more realization.

I know, as each day passes by, I will never get it again. So I live my each minute with her to the max. I gather each minute so that I have lot of memories of little Adhi when she grows up. When my mom tells me about my childhood, I just think to myself, ‘this would be me in few years time’. When I first held Adhi in my arms, it was the most beautiful moment of my life. And I will never get that feeling ever again, nor the feeling how I felt when she looked at me and smiled. Those moments still make me cry and I am sure my mom still cherishes the moment she held me for the first time.

Tomorrow she will grow into her own person. She will not need me to be around her, she will have her own life, her own family, just like I do now. But then, for today, she needs me and that’s one hell lot of a comforting feeling for me. She needs me for all her little needs (I am not sure if little babies have ‘wants’ as yet).

So my little Adhi, cry-feed-poo-sleep all you like. I just love being there for you.

A comeback for new reasons

2009-04-28T15:10:00.000+01:00

It’s been a year, a whole year!

*clap clap*

Yes, one full year without me talking to my dear bloggy, infact I had forgotten my login and password. I only said an occasional Hi! To my dear lappy and er, dear brainy was totally neglected too. Such utterly disastrous behavior of recklessness was totally unheard of during my insane days. Yes, I am still insane as ever, but these days I prefer calling myself sane.

I have my reasons, rather excuses explaining my mysterious disappearance. Russian war, Gaza crisis, Zimbabwe upheaval are some of them. They are still simpler compared to the gravity of mine.

Marriage
I absolutely have no idea what in sane world made me agree to this trap and plunge into endless responsibilities. RK fella is a great partner and companion but being pushed into the 'Aunty' circle wasnt exactly great. But as they say, happiness is not everything, one needs to get married.
*sigh*

Relocation
With marriage came the bonus of relocating to a new place, a new timezone, a new city, a new country, hell! a totally new continent. It meant a new life from scratch. Now that was something I could do without, 4 different places in 4 years.
*sigh*

Wife
Being the Harley dada comes naturally to me but being a wife, a GOOD one at that takes some effort. And if it means cooking, laundry, shopping, cleaning, eh-the less said, the much better. In total, I was kept off hook with my devil self and shown the domestic side of the poor me.
*sigh*

Home
My colour matching sense limits to my clothes and many a times, even they seem out of place. When given the Herculean responsibility of furnishing an empty house, decorating it, buying all the essentials and coordinating all the bits to make it our perfect little nest, I was left buried in piles of catalogues and interior design books. Not to forget weekly trips to furniture shops. And top it with endless arguments with the RK fella.
*sigh*

Job
Well, I did have my times of blissfully not moving a finger, but then, that time IS for not moving a finger. How can I make myself think or type?
*sigh*

Motherhood
Yeah, you heard it right, I have just been promoted as a full-time MOMMY, a diaper changing, bottom cleaning, all-time feeding, lullaby singing, coo chi cooing, full time mom.
*yeh yeh yeh*

And THAT is the only reason I am back to my bloggy, to proudly tell stories of my little princess, my dear little Adhi baby.

Aradhana, born on March 27th, 2009

Some bones in general

2008-05-22T21:51:00.000+01:00

Long time ago when the bones in me were not so lazy, I used to think out my not-very-sensible-thoughts aloud and let them to the mercy of Mr. Bloggy. Then, one day a very shocking thing happened; I got married!

And talking about the lazy bones, I am married to a person who is obsessed with bones. No, really. All that I see strewn around the house are books, papers, charts, manuals and publications on bones. I even get to proof read his articles and presentations on some boney issues. I had no idea that so many boney fellas lived in me, no wonder that I am so lazy now!

Anyway, much of my daily activities now revolve around the tele and that blessed thing called remote control. I had never known the bliss of being empty head, no deadlines to meet, no one to question, lie on the bed, hot coffee and tele sir! My life would have been a little more perfect if RK could decide on the big plasma and the recliner soon. But till then, I have nothing much to complain from life. Even my thinking is restricted to the usual nashta-sabzi-dinner wala thoughts. Get the picture?

I must say cartoons rock! Be it India, USA or UK. Kiddos get the best of the entertainment. I am big fan of the BBC-Milkshake and actually plan to paint a Bday card for myself and send it to them. They have this cool thing of reading everyone’s cards with their favorite cartoons and stuff. Oh, for those who forgot, my Happy wala B’day is next week and I love gifts.

Also, I realized that I had a fine chef bone somewhere in me. Result, I cook and I cook really well. Atleast that’s what RK keeps telling his friends and my folks. (Maybe that’s a way to keep wife at a happy bay?) Seriously, I cook a lot these days and I am a regular at recipe sites and I cook healthy stuff!

Since I neither do anything much, nor do I think much these days, that’s it for now.

Last year-This day

2008-05-02T18:44:00.000+01:00

May 2, 2008

A happily married me-a cup of hot steaming coffee-a lazy cuddle up on the bed-a lappy sitting snug-a “Friends” on the tele-a warm sunset in the background

May 2, 2007

A happy single me-a PhD in the waiting-a proposal in the air-a stranger in the background-a mail exchanged-a chat on yahoo-a call made-and a ‘yes’ for lifetime

This very day our paths crossed to become one-RK fella's and mine.

Apun wapas aaya

2008-01-31T16:58:00.000Z

Apun has been missing from apunka bloggy for a real long time. Long time bole to looooooooooooooooong time. That a long time, now you know!

Apun’s bloggy friends have updated a lot of stuff and apun has not sitofied to read any of it. I know, it was very galat baat, and apun wanted to update too, but apun was underground for a few weeks doing this.

Now, you log tell me, when apun was underground doing some udofying, how can apun sitofy and blog? Worst, how can apun show apunka sunburnt thopda?

Then, when apun was recovering from all the sand-sun-sea effect, apunki mom dhamkified on doing the shaadi prep. Now, apunki mom is a roaring lion when she has something in her mind and apun is no cheez when she roars. SO, apun is helping in the pre-shaadi prep.

Er, did I forget to mention that the saadi is for apun???

So, apun is required to do shopping, packing, inviting, eating, picking, choosing, trying, fitting, shouting, etc etc. Apun is a first timer at this so apun tried to passofy all that to mom but remember, she roars!

Apun is finally dragging to get things done and dusted. And tell you, writing the thesis is much easier than the saadi prep. And I have additional work of packing books and documents for my study and completing all my committments here.

Apun even had to pack my bacchalog after giving them a shower, drying, vaccuming and sealing. Now they sit cozy and snug, sigh! its hard to say goodbye again. On the whole, apun is doing well with all the prep and apun will be back with more shaadi stuff.

Family foto with bacchalog

Brainy (RK) gets scanned

2007-12-14T13:56:00.000Z

Ever since I came back to India, I get very less time to spend time with my lappy and bloggy. And with my wedding day drawing closer (I just have 2 blissful months), I get very little time to spend at home, leave alone blog. And this month being the last of my working time in Mlore, I have a few assignments to be wrapped up, a thesis to be written on my study, a subject notes to be reviewed and a few more loose ends to meet.

Amidst all this chaos, I have taken upon myself to sweat out every single day at the gym, come what may, not a part of my bridal boutique but as a part of keep-fit-program for my Himalayan trek (I am positive that I will unruly convince everyone concerned). So, at the end of the day I am as drabbed as a used tea bag. And my only much awaited activity of the day is crashing on the bed, which I do with complete dedication.

So, the only weekday communication I share with RK fella is restricted to one text message. The guilt factor is neutralized with the fact that he is busier than me, workaholic-er than me and forgetful-er than me and we have a whole 5 ½ hours difference between us. Hence, our texts fly at the most unsocial hours.

Last night at 3.30 am (did I get an oxymoron?) I get a text from him reading,
“I had a MRI scan of my brain”.

Now, people who know me, know me well that I am capable of creating acute imbalance in anyone’s brain. But this RK fella has been fortunate enough not to fall prey to my uncouth talk sessions. (er, the 15 days of chanter-panter I did last time when he came to mlore, he thought would last him an year). So now why the MRI scan???

My limited knowledge of these MRI’s were those of my psychotic patients showing high levels of schiz, hallucinations, OCD’s, bipolar disorders etc.(uh, for those who don’t know, I have a masters in psychotherapy). And RK fella did not show even remote symptoms of any these. Ok, I can add that he gets me on the borderline sometimes, but he sounds pretty normal otherwise.

I was perplexed beyond words and made a SOS call to him. An excited he said that it was a part of his experiment for some study on the “index finger”.

D-U-H
Can we get dumber than this???
An index finger, that’s all???
So, you have been studying an index finger all this long???
You have been actually staying late night in the hospital for an index finger???
And I bolted out of my sleep with terror reading that text for this index finger???
D-U-H

Today morning I get a mail (after a whole month) with the scan of his brainy attached and an excited explanation on how the scan shows the corresponding area of the index finger (again???). He explains that some red area is supposed to be the area of study. Also, I get the privilege to seeing the brainy thing from different dimensions, chopped and sliced. But being used to the mentally ill patients scan with huge blotches of red, I wasn’t very impressed with this tiny red of index finger, and neither was my peanut butter brainy.

Some perks of marrying a doctor!!!

But hey! now I know what my husband's brain would look like !!!

Little mail from a little fella, Samu

2007-11-05T18:42:00.000Z

Ever since I got engaged to this RK fella, I have been introduced to more cousins, aunts, uncles and all those in-law kinda people who come free with marriage. Not that I make efforts to remember their names or how they are related to RK or how I am supposed to address them or how they are related to my couzin’s wife’s sister’s uncle or any such connections. Actually, I truly believe that every amchi is related to every other amchi with the blessing of some cosmically present invisible uncle or aunt.

I myself was born into a family brimming with overflowing uncles and aunts and cousins. My maternal family and paternal family often threatened me with their battalion of relatives whom my brain refused to register-recognize-recall. Other than my immediate relatives, my knowledge of extended family was limited to ‘everyone is either an aunty or an uncle’. And then my cousins got married and added a little more family into already jam-packed relatives. Now we had every other person as my couz’s-husband’s-uncles’-son-in-laws’- sister’s-nephew kind of relations. So, now with my dear RK’s family added, I am at a total risk of family drama and in-law topping.

But this heart of mine is total fida with one little fella from RK’s family, his elder brother’s son-Samu. I am not sure if I am to call him would-be-nephew or nephew-in-law or whatever, I will stick Samubaba. This little fellow is just a little over 4 years and already an absolute darling. Full of energy and questions and talk, this fella is a bundle packed with fun.

For me, it was love at the first sight! The sleepy head was just up from his nap and recovering from his jet lag after the travel from US. Curious and reluctant to socialize with me at first, I kinda bribed him with chocolates and story books. Now, which kid can resist chocolate? And we hit on great, maybe a little better than his uncle too.

These days, every Saturday nights I am seen waiting on yahoo, hoping for him to come online. Then we talk, me chats with bold-caps-easy questions; he with his newly learnt phonetics spellings. Between us, we manage to strike a decent conversation about Thomas the train, Disney and animals. We also do a little of photo sharing and I must tell you, this fella has amazing grasp for spellings for a kid of his age.

This week he sent me a mail, his first mail to me. And I was thrilled beyond words! I got a mail from my nephew! Maybe, it’s his first mail and he writes it to me! Not to his uncles or grandparents, but to me! And it’s the first time a four year old has ever written to me all by himself! Great! I have something to save and show him when he grows up.

It’s a small mail with hardly 4 lines, lot of spelling mistakes, and nothing much to tell.
See:

HI DARMOO PACHI (pachi-aunt)
CUM HER (come here)
I HAD FUN ON HALOVEEN (halloween)
I SO SKARE TINGS (saw scary things?)

But, who cares?

I guess marriage has its own addition of people into our lives and some definitely become dearer to us than our own relations. This mail touched my heart in a different way that neither the family dinner nor the engagement ritual had. It made me feel a part of my new family, a sense of being accepted. It made me feel welcome and it made feel loved. Some day, when he grows up, I will tell Samu what his mail meant to me. I am sure we will have more mails to share, but this one will always be cherished.

But right now, I am a proud pachi showing off this mail to everyone, a mail written to her by her four year old Samubaba.

The witch of Portobello-a review

2007-10-27T18:23:00.000+01:00

I simply could not resist giving a review on this book.

The Witch of Portobello is a novel written by Paul Coelho of The Alchemist fame. Following the trend of his earlier works, this book too is aimed at discovering the hidden self. But unlike his earlier works which were presented to the reader as stories, the witch of Portobello is painted as a biography of Athena.

The book, right from the title, the cover design and the flow of contents captures the attention of the reader. Although the book seems to look a little heavy owing to the 300+ pages, it seems impossible to stop reading once you start. The language is simple but substantially rich to reach out to a common man. The story no doubt, catapults the reader to one’s own realm of wildest imagination.

The story of Athena is narrated to the reader by series of people who have known Athena personally. Now dead, a gypsy born, orphaned at birth, adopted and raised by loving parents, Athena is in constant search of harmony. She lives a life experimenting with several truths, discovering more about herself and teaching others to be in unison with the nature.

As the story unfolds, the reader is shown several dimensions of Athena’s personality and given a choice to decide for himself, ‘Who was Athena?”. But, with each narration, it only gets more interesting and confusing as the story is painted very cleverly by the author. The narration alternates between Athena-the witch and Athena-in pursuit of peace and keeps the reader glued till the very end. At several stages the reader is forced to stop, think and reflect for a moment about Athena and how much I share in common with her.

The beauty of the whole narration lay in the fact that a reader can easily relate to the people involved, happenings described and feelings undergone. Each reader may interpret the story differently as it touches home but it is very definitely has many hidden surprises for each reader.

The book is a worthy read on a lazy rainy day.

Some info on ring

2007-09-12T18:27:00.000+01:00

Exactly a month ago, I did something which is shown in the pic in the neechewala post. Now, you may wonder what made the devil in me take such a shocking step ??? I dint; I was forced to.

Left to me, I would still be romping around wildly around the streets of mlore, scaring all the dogs, haunting my old joints and just being simply lazy. The bliss of being single !!!

But, with forces called ‘parents’ nagging you all day and night, one does not have much choice. To top that, if the guy-in-question happens to conveniently overlook any of your goondagardi, you are left with no choice but get that ring. That’s exactly what happened last month !!!

Now, for all those who thought I was a tough nut to crack, this just shows how obedient and demure I am. Not that anything much has changed in my life; I am still happily chasing the dogs and racing bikes and also haunting my old addas and being lazy.

Between that historical day and now, several posts await their chance. All will be posted in due time. For mean time I will be making my presence on the beaches of Goa.

GO GOA!!!

Reason behind my absence

2007-08-19T17:49:00.000+01:00

Tagged on being weird!

2007-07-24T19:10:00.000+01:00

Deviyon aur sajjano…… Deepak bhai says I am a bindas girl!

Now, I must say I am truly impressed! Well, the only kanta in the otherwise jhakas title was the mention of a “girl”. Well, Deepak bhai, you can call me –DADA,

*HARLEYDADA*

So, this fella has tagged me with 8 crazy things about myself. It’s very hard, extremely hard. How do I select the best 8 crazy things about myself when, er, say, I am adequate in weirdness?

1. I cannot sleep without gunnu. Gunnu happens to be a little stuffed bulldog puppy that fits easily into a pocket. He says, ‘wherever dharmu goes, gunnu follows’ and he really does follow me. I have got weird stares when I did travel by night-bus or flight. Gunnu and me did all the traveling and shopping in US too! Now, I don’t share my gunnu with anyone.

2. I have a really wild imagination. There is a 70mm screen right there in my eyes which run big time shows. As you talk, I actually see a running trailer of your talk. The same happens when I read books. It even happens when I think. I just need to “See” things to register it.

3. I generally can recall any interesting books that I read, with the authors name, cover page, and page numbers. I can quote the subject with the page number and the edition without any problem. It used to make my profs a little queasy while in Uni and now, it beats the sweat out of my students in the college.

4. For all the insanity I sport around, I am a very religious person. I never leave home without praying and touching my parent’s feet and my day starts and ends with prayers. And I am very very very superstitious.

5. I strongly believe that I have 3 people residing within my upper chamber. Mr. peanut butter brain, Mr. Tanhayee and Mr. Bloggy. If you see me busy amidst a conversation all by myself, don’t be surprised; I am just talking to one of these fellows.

6. At the end of every month I do a SWOT analysis of my life. This helps me to know how fruitful my month was and the list of unfinished tasks. I also plot the monthly learning curve and analyze my laziness; not that I have done anything much to overcome it.

7. Sad songs by Mukesh, played at unearthly hours of night make me very happy. And for the devil’s worth in me, I cannot-just cannot understand English music. Play me a tamil number, play a telgu one or a mallu hit and be assured that I will break into a tapangucchi dance, but not English.

8. I believe that non-living living things have the power in them to absorb all your negative vibes. I am often seen talking to my bikey ( now, I have 2 babies-saffire and active), my lappy dear and my cell phone. I always thank them after a use and wish them a hello every morning.

I have few more inherent wacky behaviors, but as Deepak bhai tagged me with 8, I will stick to them.

BTW, if you know of any guys who are looking on similar grounds, let them know, “I am still single-ready to mingle”.

Take 3... I am back!

2007-07-19T17:25:00.000+01:00

So, it’s been almost 2 long months and I have been as regular as the Halley’s Comet. In short, I wasn’t around. Which explains the absence of any post in my bloggy. And I doubt if any of my regular blog buddies will now visit me for some time soon.

If I were to give the detailed script reading about my whereabouts, it would be more boring than any of our Ekta darling’s mega marry-divorce-marry-die-remarry serials. In short, lemme tell you, I have been having a very lethargic bloggers block and the ever-never working brainy was on world tour.

Finally, I have decided that my life is not the same without a regular page to update and regular fellow-blogs to read and comment and yeah! drool over the daily mundane happenings. So, hopefully this time I will be around for a long time. And I really need to woo back my old buddies as I am sure, many have parceled my link.

It was something that happened last night that woke the sleeping brainy and forced him to remember the password to this page. Trust me, I really had forgotten the password and was wondering which animal it was. Righto! My passwords are always the names of animals, makes it easy for me to remember them; we share many similar traits.

Anyway, last night as I was devouring the P.G.Woodehouse series, I get this sms, and guess what! It was from my darling bro who was in the next room. To make it more concise, we were separated by a wall.

Bro: Can you tell me what exactly mad arts is? We have a compi and we have to win..
Me: Can you come to this room for the discussion please?
Bro: Cant…I am full and cant walk. You can come here.. and you can even ring… I will listen! Me sleepy.
Me: Ah! u have the need honey-not me. If that’s the case with you, will talk when u not full nd not sleepy
Bro: who else will listen to your songs…?
Me: I have some people in line, if you don’t know.(FYI)
Bro: I asked you about mad arts, not about mad people!!!

……and thus the sms flew across the wall…..

Speak about technology bringing people closer!!!

Bloggy rides my activa

2007-05-25T18:34:00.000+01:00

For every like-minded friend who knows me, know the fact that I have a real wild imagination. I have a huge 70mm screen running vivid pictures all time, as I think, as I talk, as you talk, and even as I ride. It so happens that, I get most of the ideas to write when I ride.

Uh-oh!!!

Imagine this: it’s a very pleasant day. And the happy me is singing to glory riding her now-new-jetblack-activa. And the happy me is not bothered that there are other 101 vehicles around her. And the happy me sings all these songs in mega decibels such that the traffic police would request for a silencer. And the happy me sees a cat.

Screech to the song…

Now, the happy me gets thoughts about the cat. Then the fish. Then the sea. Then the sunset. Then the helipad. Then the chocolate gateaux. Then the friends. Then….. the list continues till the happy me parks the vehicle.

It is weird that I sing on the reads. It’s even more so that I don’t care when people stare at me. And then with these happy thoughts, I am all lost. I actually frame each sentence while I am riding. Every flow comes from there.

Many a times, I don’t bother to write my thoughts. Many a times I just write it on a plain page and forget about it. Some other times, it is left half-drafted in the blogger. Other times its left forgotten on the note pad. Maybe, one fine rainy day, I will post all these together.

As for now, riding my active rocks!!!

Just for a side note: In one of the impromptu sessions, I was delighted to get “A dinner date with John Abraham”.

Cool uh???

Yes! me lord

2007-05-25T18:06:00.001+01:00

After all that gyan filled session with the grey-haired-profs for the best part of this month, I took a chance with 23 lawyers yesterday noon. Actually, they invited me for a 3 hour session on Human Relations and I thought, ‘why not?’

So, at 3 noon, I see myself surrounded by 23 lawyers, seniors and juniors together. It was a bit unnerving and I had this “yes me lord” feeling. All of them looked at me with the same tempo of seeing a victim in the court. Only difference here was, they paid me for being watched. And my, I was impressed when they responded beautifully to me.

One learning I truly enjoyed was, the game of ‘My Friend’. Each participant without fail addressed as “My Partner” and it reminded me of partner in crime. They were indeed professional people I say!

Next one came where I wanted to bring out the learning on “Stress”. Most of them were worse than my summer camp kids when it came to troubling others. I stood there, still and taken aback as these senior people managed their hands in acting weird. It was interesting.

One more learning, came from the group discussion session. The reports were indeed very systematic and brief, which I guess is the practice of the day-to-day business.

Now, I have an offer to do follow-up sessions for the firm. I guess it’s gonna be very interesting. Next assignment will be working on a bunch of chartered accountants. Don’t I love not having to work!

Safed baal-kaale baal

2007-05-19T21:15:00.000+01:00

Past few days have seen me sitting demurely with 62 senior professors from 5 states for HR training. We have been working on defining a few HR concepts, learning, unlearning and relearning a few others and discussing a few more topics which would put anyone to sleep. We were also doing some in-depth study on Human Sufferings and Virtual Presences. Although, I have no clue why we need to study about sufferings when I am around?

Anyways, my deemed presence amidst all that grey hair was the result of: 7 years of association with the HR institute, the areas I have worked for my study, and the Director of the institute thought that I too could contribute some valuable inputs.

Now, when you team-up a young jet-black hair with a bunch of grey hair, there is bounced to be some volatile ideas. And especially if that “black-hair” happens to be someone like “me” who lives the principles drilled into her by the same Director some 7 years ago and will not let any of it to be challenged by anyone. So, it was indeed a very interesting combi.

After interacting with them for all these days, I have learnt to be prepared:

1. To get the shock of my life as I walk into a room full of senior profs who shoot dagger looks at me.

2. To see the shock on their faces when they hear me speak about my topic.

3. To see more shocked faces when my verdict is accepted at the end.

4. To be targeted with questions, some offending ones and some challenging ones.

5. To be able to stand up to them, look into their eyes and be assertive.

6. To make them accept that age does not make me any less competent.

7. To be asked about my age, marriage, and other personal questions and still smile.

8. To be accepted by them and be treated as an equal.

9. To crack jokes, laugh, share common gossip and some light moments.

10. To be praised and respected by the same group.

Unsettling thoughts on getting “settled”

2007-05-10T19:18:00.000+01:00

On an average day, a average conversation with any of my average acquaintance goes on these grounds:

(lemme call this average person TDH as in some eera-gera-nattu-phera)

TDH: so, what are your plans to settle down?

Me: uh? Aren’t I already settled down ?

TDH: well, I mean when are you getting married and settling?

Me: oh! You mean when am I gonna “unsettle” ?

TDH: uh??? I meant settle…marriage?

ME:right, marriage… unsettle!

TDH:*blank*

Right, lemme give you this situation. Imagine you, happy, independent, successful and enjoying every minute of life. No tension, no responsibility, no questions, no one to boss you around. You have a decent degree next to you name, an impressive career to boast of, and an okish bank balance. Your weekends are mainly filled with equally lazy friends and indolent activities. Movies, gossip, shopping, eating and sleeping are of prime importance. You are your own boss and life is a complete bliss.

Now, the external unavoidable force called “parents” decide that its time you realized that happiness was not everything and ask you to get married. With the forces bestowed only on them and amidst all the senti stuff, emotional dramas, and blackmails, you agree to give it a shot.

And now starts the endless saga of confusions and confrontations. Finding that “one” right partner. Trying to explaining the process is next to impossible but a definite enriching experience. After much screening and screaming, you are given a final option. I wonder why it’s ever called an ‘option’ in the first place with them deciding on everything.

World turns topsy-turvy if you are the girl. The settled you before marriage has to totally unsettle after marriage. You have to leave your home, your friends, your job, your Johny boy posters, and other very intricate details that make your daily life a bliss and relocate to a new city. Now, you have to start your life from scratch, make friends, get a job and know your way around the new city. To add to this, you have a new person in your life who demands all your attention and patience.

So, wasn’t I right???

Marriage is not about “settling down” but “unsettling” ???

Ortho, thy say on bikes

2007-05-08T18:59:00.000+01:00

It's been 5 full days since my new bikey’s speedometer has not crossed 20km/h. It's been 5 full days since I have been avoiding my bikey to such a great extent that I actually take a rickshaw at times. It's been 5 full days since I have let even the bicycles to overtake me.

For the people who know me, this must have come as a shock. I and no speeding? Must be a joke, right?
Nah! I hate to admit but it’s a fact.

It so happens that I was amidst a very serious discussion with this fella “RK” who happens to be an orthopedic. He sports a few super specialization degrees on bones next to his name which are more complex than any of my operation research problems. I usually keep away from doctors; dangerous that these fellas are, scare me to death.

So, I was just animating my love for bikes and speed when I get an annoying e-grunt. Unguarded, I proudly declared how I rip along and the other usually bikey talks that I love to do. So,

rk: do you wear a helmet? with jaw protection?

harleydada: yep, I have a matching black helmet *brims with pride*
rk: and a jacket with spinal bar to protect the spine?

harleydada: uh-oh *who ever thought about that*

rk: and trousers with knee pads to protect the knee cap? and boots with ankle bars to protect the ankle?

harleydada: *gulp*

rk: these are minimum safety requirements

harleydada: *screech-scream*

Er, did he think I was planning to do some formula bikey racing or some weird cross country biking? Surely, with that outfit on, ripping through the streets of Mlore, I would no doubt look like a super bike woman.

Since, laaton ke bhoot baton se nahi manthe, and I was one such bhoot, he continued with more gyan.

rk:Ok. Imagine this. you are traveling very slow in a scooter at a speed of 20kmph

harleydada: *oh yeah, in my dreams*

rk: Imagine you weigh 60kg

harleydada: *er, why don’t we talk about the weather instead*

rk: now, as you are traveling very slowly , as slow as 20kmph, you hit a stationary object. you will be thrown forward with nothing but your arm to support your fall. the moment on your arms will be 60 X 20 = 1800kg. if your arms are strong enough to lift 1.2 tonnes of weight, feel free to ride a bike.

harleydada: *gulp*

rk: if you travel at 30kmph it is 1.8 tonnes

harleydada: er... how do we put 40+ ?

rk: that makes it 2.4 tonnes.

rk: the only reason why cars are safer is, there is a seat belt and some impact absorbing bars in front to reduce this impact

harleydada: *bars…like in hic hic?*

rk: if at 80 kmph you hit a stationary object, it is certain death.

harleydada: *super gulp*

rk: you have two choices, either become strong enough to lift 2.4 tonnes or stop riding a bike.

-End of the bikey conversation-

For years now, bikes have been reminding me of my Johny boy. I am totally aware that John Abraham is totally unaware of my divine existence. But Johny:Bikes::Bikes:Johny has been my equation to drool big time. But after the threatening talks on bikes, I am about to reformat the equation.

The funny part was, after all the extra precautions and speed limit now, I am more disaster prone. Looks like I really have to tone myself to lift 2.4 tonnes or quit riding as the RK fella says. *sigh*

Btw, I was wondering, if I had to pick between the Johny guy and Hayabusa, what would I do???

Sweet hangovers from the camps

2007-05-03T19:41:00.000+01:00

I believe I was hardly in my nappies when my dear mom decided to drop me into a nearby Summer Camp. Maybe the very idea of having a hyper-active baby around made her take this step, or she had this very rare intuition that her little dear would end up going for camps year after year. So, why not start now???

For whole 6 years now, I have been coordinating a few camps around. I missed the fun while I was in US. But now, with the action packed myself back, I had 3 batches of camps in hand. Each one different and each one very interesting.

Now, nothing can make me happier than a bunch of hooligans who roar and tear the peace and quite of the organizers. And the very fact that they love my classes brings out the child in me and I end up making more noise than them. When surrounded by these little imps, I have no hearth to say no to their whims.

Most of my public speaking classes turn into a havoc creating debate sessions. Some even get into the verbal battle of proving their vocabulary skills. Team work is always fun with ads and story-skits. And I am always left awestruck with their hidden talents and all the positive vibes.

This year the RX group decided to introduce a summer nature camp and they entrusted the responsibility to make it “really different” to a buddy and me. We came up with a real wacky, fun-filled set of activities that camp ran into 2 full sets on demand. The difference was the outdoor life they were given.

A monkey bridge to hang around, rope ladders to dangle, swings, wooden balance bars, a spread of tress to climb, tents, and everything that spoke of wild outdoor life. Kids even had a camp dog that has grown really fat with the generous eatings. The kids even got to paint the trees, walls and even their own faces.

Each kid was loaded with sweat and dirt, he smelled, his clothes soiled, but a happy smile on his face. I myself have tanned into a dark shade of tandoori brown with all running under the sun. But, it was fun till the last day. We even had camp fires and night dinners.

Today was the valedictory of the last batch of the last camp and we had campers from the previous batches too who joined in for the celebrations. We all sang, teased each other, hugged and bid farewells.

These camps have been a part of my life for a long time now. Every year I wait eagerly to spend my time with a bunch of hyper-active kids of all ages and be a kid all over again. Their innocence and laughter fills my soul with all the energy I need to face the coming days. When they compliment me, it is more rewarding than any of the prizes I have won. The sparkle of their eyes leaves me wondering if I will ever get enough of such camps.

The best part comes after the camps. With the huge group of campers from several different camps where I visit as a resource person, I generally bump into one kid occasionally. The endearing smile talks a lot about their love for you and that just makes my day. Be it a tiny tot or a high school teenager, every one greets you with that encompassing warmth. Maybe you will never know until you are a part of a camp yourself.

But today, I still am under the hang-over of all those hugs and kisses the kids gave me before saying our byes. Some smiles will be remembered for many days to come and I am waiting to meet a few of them around too. Right now, I am sleepy.

As the campers say,

Three cheers…HIP HIP HURRAY!!!

No excuse, only (F)CATS

2007-05-02T20:22:00.000+01:00

A person of my size and caliber cannot disappear. So, for all those angelic souls who have been wondering about my un-presented-self, I am back.

I wanted to add one “with a BANG” but owing to the latest developments and my act of uncouth bravery, it hurts.

The story goes thus; its was a very sunsaan raat. The kaali amavas ki night. (not very sure about the chand and its dating but as all hindi movies talk about amavas, I stick to the same). The kuthes howled from some distant. One akeli, sundar, abhala naari (that is to be read a “me”) was riding her dear saffire. Ripping at this time of the night, singing the Mukesh sad songs, enjoying the breeze in the hair, zroom…

And suddenly, “meow” the billi ka baccha jumped from nowhere. As this dear lady with her heart of an angel, goodness of a saint, screeched the brakes of the gaddi running on 60kmph. The billi ka baccha ran to the comfort of his maa, and poor me was left with strained neck and tendon tear of the right wrist.

Now, for all those who personally know me, think that I was born to fall. Talk the love of hurting oneself and I could be a synonym. But I am really proud of myself that I saved that billi ka baccha. So what if I could not type for a few days?

Maybe, some day, when I rip around, one granny billi will be showing its poote billi,
“dekho beta dekho, she was the brave woman who saved my life on that kaali amavas ki raat” .

‘Meow’

Some "meow" thoughts

2007-04-07T18:34:00.000+01:00

ON A VERY SERIOUS NOTE: WHEN I SAY "FRIEND" IT READS AND MEANS "FRIEND" AND NOTHING ELSE PLEASE.

Today I bid a smiling bye to my bestest friend in the Bajpe airport. He was leaving to US on a long term project only a few weeks after my return from the same country. As I saw him get into the kingfisher flight which would take him to Mumbai I felt a few tears roll down my cheeks as I knew it would be almost a year before I saw him again, maybe more.

Some people are a part of our life and we never imagine how our life would be without them. They are the extended beings of our own self. They fit perfectly into our life and we grow into a compatible existence. Then one day they go away and take with them a part of our life. Then our life is never same again, but we learn to live and get on with it. But still, there is something missing.

My first memory of him was that of some 21 years ago, while we were in playschool. He gave me a bloody bite till my hand started bleeding and I had to take a tetanus shot at the tender age of 3. We went to the same school too. While he was one among the top shot brains, I was a very privileged outcast. We even went to the same college. He was back bencher rowing smoothly in studies and me was a first bencher struggling hard to get pass marks. We landed in different worlds and our life never crossed each other.

Then, one fine day we met at our batch reunion and our lives opened up for each other. Before no time we the best buddies. From then on, he was a part of everything that happened in my life. We were almost like a part of each other’s family. My cousins would come, and I would drag him along; I would go to his house and chat with his dad for hours; He would team up with my brother and tease me to no ends; We would talk for hours about nothings and laugh over the most stupid things; He would chauffeur me around and even do my shopping; We knew each other’s friends like we knew our own; I even made him do my resume while I loitered around and he made me do his packing while he freaked out; I would blast him if he did not call me and he would make me feel guilty if I dint meet him; he even asked my approval about his gf’s and he gave his remarks about my mine.

The list being endless, we were a part of each others life. Even while I was in US, my day would start with his mail and it was never complete without talking to him. He would be the first person after my parents I would cry to and he always had a comforting hug. I would complain to him about even misery under the sun and he would lighten my mood with ice-cream. Yeah, we had a deal you see, he would always pay for my ice-creams. And he always got me temptations-rum & raisins. Now with him away, I am likely to loose some weight.

It’s very rare that you have friends who give unconditionally and he is one of them. Define a friend and he fills in perfectly. I could trust him with my life and be assured that he would not let me down. I could tell him anything and everything and be assured that he would not judge me or think bad. At times he would even bear my temper and in no time I would be back to normal.

Now, with him away, I will miss the lunchtime talks, the quick coffee, the JD sessions. I will miss borrowing books and cd’s and fighting over smallest things. I will even miss his dogs barking at me. Going to his house will never be the same without him around. I will miss the weekends when we would hang around in each other’s homes. I will miss those long drives. I will miss him when I go our common addas.

I could say tons about this dear friend of mine, but as I just read his sms as he leaves the country, all I can say is, “I will miss you Dev”.

In 10 mins, I say

2007-04-05T11:44:00.000+01:00

Talk about being lazy and I will give you 100 watt smile. Very true!

Specially, now that my dental fellas are gleaming and brimming with over 20K spent lavishly on them, I leave no reasons to smile or laugh or anything which indulges me in showing my teeth.

Well, I don’t know which topic to start first, about me being lazy or about the brand new dental crowned glory. (I have 10 mins where I can yap before I logout.) Either way, I am obsessed with both. And anyway, being lazy is a long timed principle which I have perfected over a period of time. So much will go unsaid about this one assist of mine.

As for my dental affair, the previously paranoid me, now waits for next dental appointment. That too, very eagerly. Reason: the darling dentist I have. He is such a sweetheart that I have no qualms about letting him drill or punch or bang any of my tooth. And the extreme complications that I had, thanks to him, have been rectified. The only dark cloud in my otherwise pearly white dental life is the whooping bills I get. These days I am seen recommending my dentist to anyone with teeth.

If you think what has made me disappear with such a thud from the “net” life, I owe it to the holistic living that I have been sacredly practicing. I am making a rush for the next session as my 10 mins are up, but will be back with more toothy light on that one.

"tata"

When Dev gets to hack my Mr.Bloggy

2007-03-19T17:46:00.000Z

This post comes all the way from "just another day" guy, DEV MALLYA

A small disclaimer to begin with – it is under extreme pressure that I am forced to write a post for Dharmu’s bloggy when my own poor dear blog lies unattended. Irony, anyone?

So here I sit, tapping away to glory on Dharmu’s lappy (laptop, before you wonder and conclude wrongly) wondering what to write about while she watches sad old songs on my computer. (sigh) I cant understand why people listen to sad songs when I’m around… I can depress people faster than any sad old song.

Ok ok, coming to the topic of the post, after taking a few pot shots at Dharmu in my last post here, I’ve decided to set the record straight. She did not have half her sis-in-law’s ice cream as originally reported. It was more like 47.5%. She left a few raisins and a bit of strawberry for me.

As you can see from her last couple of posts (and the month long absence), our sweet lil (actually not-so-little) Dharmu has been quite a busy girl since she came back. Too busy to meet me as well. Hmpf. So… I was real glad when she called me on Friday to meet up. She came over to my place… to meet my dad as usual. Double hmpf.

For the last three days, we’ve been going out a lot together – a trip to Moodbidri on Saturday, followed by chocolate gateaux at BonBons after a long, long time. The lady at BonBons was so happy to see Dharmu. Seems her business wasn’t the same without her. After all, where would Pop Tate’s Chocklit Shoppe be without Jughead’s business?

I will not mention the registry office joke – that’s a post by itself. What say Dharmu? In other news, nothin much over the last two days – we’ve been hanging out at each other’s place. So, in return for the good times, she’s decided that I will guest author on her blog for one time only! Thank God for that.

Since this is my one and only chance, I would like to make public quite a lot of secrets about her… *wicked cackling laughter* On second thought, she’s going to guest write on my blog as well. More than anything, I’d rather not want it to be my obituary.

Jokes apart, there is very little I wouldn’t do for this girl. She’s been with me through thick and thin – mostly thick. Which is why both of us have decided to go on diets with immediate effect – starting tomorrow. (It’s the weekend after all)

Which means no ice creams for Dharmu, no Rum n Raisins chocolates, no chips and other junk food. Are you sure you want to do this? Think over it, sweetie. ;)

I don’t know about her diet, but I’m sure she’ll make me stick to mine. She’s a self confessed bully, and I’m the small kid that she’s always bullying around. It helps when the person bullying you is as sweet as she is. (li’l bit of buttering up here, so I can sneak a couple of ice creams) But believe me, you just cant not like this girl.

I’ve never seen anyone who’s as adorable – except for "HER" (Dharmu, I know you’ll know who) – and who has as many friends as she does. Except on Orkut where some folks have like 591.5 ‘friends’ and 476.4 ‘fans’.

She’s still not given up the futile task of getting me to fight with her, which means she still tries to irritate me. Believe me, no reaction is good reaction in her case.

Still, here’s an ode to my bestest friend ever. You can always eat my head (goes without saying) – it’s fat-free unlike yours – and still stick to your diet.

Now, please, off with the horns on your head. Love you, sweetheart.

*Dharmu takes a step back, takes a bow, gives a smile and thanks DEV*

Mein kyun blog karun?

2007-03-18T18:03:00.000Z

After my mysterious act of not being seen around in the bloggy for all these past days, I am sure the regular junta would have resolved to terminate the fact of my existence. And I had half the mind to leave a note to each of my bloggy friends about my revival coming back but I checked this urge as I wanted to use the same time to reply a few mails in my yahoo.

I am turning into an epitome of a lazy soul. But I need to blog regularly because:

1. Most of my daily incidents are potential bloggy materials. Especially when I come across some very interesting people and equally interesting incidents.

2. I look at my comp (it is officially my Bro’s comp) very guiltily when I don’t as much bother to connect to the net. I sometimes even avoid direct eye contact with my dear old lappy because I feel he gives me a real scorchy “look”.

3. At the end of the day I feel real incomplete without have posted for days together. My bloggy is a part of me and when I don’t spend some time with him, my day feels unfinished.

4. When I don’t post, I hardly read others blogs and this bothers me too. My blog friends are a part of my virtual life and not being associated with them for a long time is equally unsatisfying for me.

5. When I don’t login to blogger and forget the password I cannot access any of my other accounts.

So I continue to blog.

Me, after a month

2007-03-17T19:51:00.000Z

It’s been ages since I posted. A month to be very precise. Maybe I have lost that touch of keying down my thoughts and posting it at the end of the day. Maybe my days are not as eventful as before. Maybe they are more eventful than ever. Maybe it’s just the process of settling down into my life. Maybe it is, after all.

It’s the longest time in the little life of my dear bloggy that a whole month has passed without me churning up a new post, rather a demented piece of thought. Excuses to be given are many but the fact remains that I have been pushing the task myself. Several times over the past month I have pushed myself to write something but passed it with some lame excuse promising to write sometime soon. But, that every “sometime” never came until tonight, only coz the India-Bangladesh match was not worth watching.

If you were to ask me what exactly kept me busy for all these days, you would not find me mumbling for words or fumbling for reasons or the list of things I have done. I will readily give you a complete set of things I have been doing, maybe in complete organized manner to surprise you. Yes, because I have been getting myself to pick up the strands of my life which I had left incomplete two whole years ago. And mind you, it’s not easy to start life from between, even if I have lived my whole life in this city.

First of all, the city has changed a lot in these two years and it’s hard to get yourself adapted to these changes. The very innocence which I loved about this city has changed into a rapidly emerging possible metro-city material. I sometimes hate to admit that I don’t want my city to change; I want it as we had it for years. I don’t want the concrete roads winding over those beautiful gullies. I don’t want that big buildings over those beautiful fields. I don’t want any multiplex nor do I want those big malls. I still love to go to the central market and do some leisure bargains. And I don’t want to wear a helmet.

Then, I had to change my dear old dentist. Now for a person who is absolutely paranoid about her dental wellbeing, a dentist makes the ultimate priority. And changing the old dentist means replacing a vital part of my life. But I had to undergo this drastic move as my dear toothy decided to give me some real hard times. Result: new dentist. A wonderful one at that and I have the deemed pleasure to visit him every alternate day from past one month. You can actually see me marketing this fella free of cost coz for me; he is the best dentist in whole of Mlore. (More on my tooth and *ahem dentist later)

I have been giving guest lectures off late and my heartfelt sympathies to all those souls who are forced to attend my ghostful talks. Trust me people, if I had the chance, I would have offered you to go and watch movies in any of the shady theaters of Mlore. And I myself would have taken shelter in one to the ice-cream parlors to beat this summer sun. But, in the cruel hands of destiny, we both have to bear each other.

As if that torture was not enough, I made my presence felt as a judge for few events in a national level management meet. It was indeed a thrilling experience to be sitting ‘this side’ of the stage as compared to all those years of ‘that side’ of the stage as a participant. Even thrilling was that experience of sitting besides very senior people who once used to judge my presentations. Some Kodak moments for me.

When you have a temple trustee for a dad and kinda social worker for a mom, both running full fledged businesses, you are never short of social functions. I have been attending ample of ‘Dharmic pravachanas’, ‘Brahma Mahotsavas’, and alike which at times make me wonder if I need to take up Sanyas sometime soon. I have even been dragged to attend some highly “samskruthik-sahithik” programs which have been improving my patience level at a very impressive rates.

To beat the record, I will be conducting a few HR classes for some of the summer camps in Mlore. So my dear kids, you will have no mercy which so ever summer camp you choose to attend. You will find me in full force tagging your little brains. *muah muah* But I really hate the meetings previous to these camps as no one bothers to come on time and half the meeting goes abusing the other like-camps. But I promise to be good.

My visitation to the library has been very volatile recently as I have taken it upon me to read all the possible Archie comics, Casper, Tinkle, Enid Blyton series and R.K.Narayan books. I have given up intellectual reading for sometime now and taken solace under delightful reading. I have been watching all the Tom&Jerry toons and Ducktales too.

On a complete different note, the sun, moon, stars and the beaches of Mlore continue to rise-shine-set at very regular timings.

Just before yawning, my say

2007-02-17T15:47:00.000Z

With prolonged absence from bloggy and so many things happening in my life, I have tons to talk about. But the usual lazy me refrains from waking up brainy, making him type words, draft an insensible post and actually posting it. My hibernation from my dear lappy has been so bad that I have forgotten most of my login passwords. The once-upon-a-time-net-savvy-me has been a lappy angutha chap. Sigh.

Just to add to the shocked look on your face, I have not checked orkut for a month now, yahoo mail is ignored for 20 days now and I have not read any any any blogs. See, thats how slothful I have turned into. Nah, me is not to be blamed. Left to me, I would have blissfully slept for the best part of the day, flipped channels, browsed net to my dear heart’s content and watched the dear old sun set lazily into the Arabian Sea.

But my Mom lets no such thing. She ensures that even the devil in me is busy with her hyper schedules. One can actually see me using my otherwise much preserved brains. To say, I am assisting her in her business but trust me, she has made me a bonded labor. I am actually planning to use the 6 steps to leave the planet given by Douglas Adams in his Hitchhikers guide to galaxy.

If you wonder how I got the time to post now, lemme me explain. I type on my lappy when I am free; the saved file is then transferred into the flash drive; the file from the flash drive is loaded into the desktop at home; and only then it is loaded into the blogger. Such troubles for the poor little me.

Anyway, I have decided that I need to religiously browse the net at least once in a week to use my share of browsing on my Bro’s comp. er, you see, back in Mlore, I am supposed to share everything with a seventeen year old confused soul. And he thinks gluing his nose to the comp is the coolest thing in the universe next to the ‘sms’ punching. Hence, I have demanded my share of browsing too.

The happening things in my life include the food I have been mercilessly forcing on my already bloated balloon sized self. And mind you, I have no regrets. I am enjoying every morsel that I blissfully place in my mouth. Also, I made my presence felt in all my favorite eateries here and many were delighted to have me back. I guess they are glad that their sales will rocket high in days to come.

One thing that hasn’t changed from US to Mlore is my obsession for the Pokiri songs. That’s a Mahesh Babu starred Telugu movie with a sexy babe who kept making silly faces in the whole movie. I love the songs of this movie for their beats and rhythm. I have no clue what the lyrics mean but I believe they must be interesting as Mahesh Babu smiles while singing them. Btw, he is the same dude to whom our Namrata Shirodkar chick is married to and he acts really well. But, not as smart as our Johny boy, sorry; MY Johny boy.

As for today’s news, it was Dev's B'day and it was really a lot of fun with him treating us for lunch. He might upload all the photos sometime soon and also a complete update about the cake cutting thingy. After all the eating, I am really tired and its my time to sleep. Yawn.

Travelling back all the time zones

2007-02-16T14:51:00.000Z

I am back in Mangalore. That very much explains my prolonged absence from all the channels which showed the distinct signs of me being alive.

Yes, finally I am back in Mlore and back in complete action. Although the so said ‘action’ will be less frequent owing to the obnoxious schedule my dear Mom has for me. I trust some people will be sighing a moov waala “aah-se-aahhaa-tak” relief but knowing me, I will make the best of the little time I have.

First, my flight from US to Blore was very eventful with the best part spent snoring. Surprisingly, I never felt even the slightest twang of pain or ‘god-I-don’t-wanna-leave-US’ type ka feelings. I guess I lived my life to the max while I was given the golden chance and now I was going back to where I belonged. It was just another much traveled trips for me before I went back home. I was more eager to see who would give me company for the 14 long hours of flight.

Luckily or otherwise, I had the deemed pleasure of having all the 3 seats to myself. Yes, trust me. The fully booked flight had 2 vacant seats next to me and I slept solid with 3 pillows, 3 blankets stretched across 3 seats. Some people are very lucky I say.

We had a small transit in Taipei, Taiwan where I fully dedicated the given 2 hours on duty free shopping. I must admit that I am totally impressed with this dollar thing. You can exchange it for any currency without any hassle. The people in this international airport spoke very little, rather no English. You ask them anything and they will show you their calci with the dollar value. I tried very hard to ask for a particular variety of chocolate and the pretty lady just told me “local money”.

The next few hours to Kuala Lumpur were spent watching Khosla ka Ghosla and some Tamil movie. The former one was real funny low budget movie but a total time pass and the later one was Kamal Hassan and Jyothika starred suspense one. I really liked both the movies. Yeah, I must mention the food and hospitality of the Malaysian Airlines was totally awesome. Junta, please fly Malaysia.

Now, when you have a full day at your own sweet disposal and a transit visa in hand, how do you not tour around Malaysia? Yeas, I did the same thing, touring around Malaysia. Complete details coming up in the next blog. I had a wonderful time with 4 just-like-me-insane people who took the tours with the same guide. We all had a great time I guess, coz I dint meet them after reaching the airport.

My flight back to Blore was drowned with all the excited me jumping in the seat and an exhausted Japanese some big-shot for Wipro next to me. He was trying very hard to ask me a few things with his real limited English and I gave him some fundu updates in my animated language, call it what may, but it definitely wasn’t English for all I know. The flight kept hovering above Blore unable to land due to bad weather. I was in mood to jump into a dance for ‘Swades’ song but I really dint want to scare the Wipro guy. It was his first time in India. And I also somewhat convinced him to try the auto rickshaw. I wonder what happened next.

Anyway, home coming was simply great. Just great. Simply great. Add all the superlatives, that great. Nothing beats to being at home with loved ones.

Let me just stop with that.

Woh last few din

2007-01-30T00:51:00.000Z

These are my last few days in San Diego. The very last days of my independent, irresponsible, immature, blissful, carefree life which I have been living for more than a year now. I kinda feel a small twinge in my heart to leave back all that was dear to me. its been a wonderful feeling being all by myself and learning to live a life I had never dreamt of.

Anyway, my last few days are action packed. I have so much of unfinished tasks at hand that my hand already hurts with the thoughts. The only cloud in the otherwise happy me is the fact that my tickets are not yet confirmed. Hopefully it will be confirmed in a day or so; else I will be delighted to do a world tour before I land to India.

I have finally packed one bag after 4 trial packing attempts. It took me just 5 hours to pack one bag. I did watch two movies in the process of packing and often had to repack and unpack the already packed stuff. In the end, my back was hurting like hell with all the efforts of lifting and weighing the stuff. The second suitcase is in line for packing sometime today. BTW I watched Hum Saath Saath Hain and Karan Arjun which explains my delay time.

My room looks empty without the usual mess around. The otherwise disarranged wardrobe is literally empty, the teddys’ are all stuffed into the suitcase, the books are ready to be media-mailed and the general feeling of my room is lost. I think I even heard my voice echo in the room. When I finish with my second suitcase, the room will be totally empty. Although I still have a huge stack of clothes and other stuff to be donated to the charity.

In the office, I cleaned my desk and arranged all the remaining things. I had bundles of things to be discarded. I even had to empty the inbox and mail a few people. Also, I have to update all my files with notes so that the next person taking charge of my desk does not curse me. My usual colorful desk with all the little toys, flowers and numerous sticky looks drained out of life. So the me is not in the mood to be cheerful.

I am meeting up with all my friends to tell my final byes. It kinda hurts to leave everyone and go back when you have grown close to each other. Those days will always be very memorable to me. I will miss each one of them for each one was sepcial to me in their own way.

Two of my darling friends drove all the way from LA to meet me before I left to India. I really felt touched with their love. One of them even offered to get a little of my luggage when he comes down. We had a lazy weekend chatting insanely for the whole night about every damn topic under the sun, er, moon. But I was really very happy that they came to meet me.

For today, me is happy that me is going back, me is tensed that me has no ticket, me is senti that me is leaving, me is lazy to pack, and me is sleepy. So the me will stop.

2007-01-30T00:45:00.000Z

My darling friends,

(specially for those who left me lovely comments on my previous post)

Thanks a tons for all the lovely hugs!!!

Not so bad after all

2007-01-26T00:30:00.000Z

Ok, the bottom line for today is that I am really mad at myself and everything around that ‘myself’. Read it M-A-D. All in caps, bold, italics, times new roman in font 24. And I am mad at myself coz I am mad as in MAD. Forget it.

I should be coolly sitting on the beach, glazing at the evening sun, enjoying the pleasant San Diego weather, watching the kids play, a chilled glass of margarita, just perfect. My last few days in States should be very memorable. Nah, instead, me is worried and tensed with no mood to work, no mood to pack, no mood to talk.

My Take: Bloggy is the only thing I can do at this time. Righto, just doing that.

At this time, I don’t have a flight ticket as all the flights are full, I have a deadline to leave the country, have a lost a considerable amount of hard earned dollars, have to buy a new ticket for a whooping double amount if I get one and there is so much of unattended things. It’s just such a great feeling of being stranded in an alien country.

My take: I have a darling aunt who is trying to get me tickets from her agent for a good deal for the same dates.

Then I have this terrible tooth pain. My right corner upper wisdom tooth decided to make his uninvited presence at this time, making things more terrible for me. This tooth in question is pushing all the remaining tooth with such pressure that even a bite hurts like hell. I wish I could hammer him down. The only person I miss the most at this time is Dr. Jithesh, my dentist. I guess I need to see him the first thing when I land.

My take: Maybe the wisdom tooth will help me be more mature. And I will get to see Jithesh. Yepee!!!

Then my HR gives me shocking news of the terms of ending my contract with the company just a few days before my last day. All the people who made this “international training policy” in India and US have quit the company. So, I literally have no one to clarify this ‘contract’ with and now, if they think I will pay such a whooping sum of money with the salary they give me, they must be nuts. Result, the next company which hires me will have to have me without a relieving letter. Else, I will run a rickshaw. Dignity of labor I say.

My take: My manager is the dearest person and till she backs me up, I have no probs. Well, I don’t need a letter for my PhD either. Coming back home is all I need at this time.

Then one guy comments on my previous post asking “what u write”. He even asks me to write from others point of view. And also invites me to read his “fantastic” articles. Now, what I write in my blog is my sole personal problem. I will write whatever-the-heck-in-the-devils-soul to my satisfaction without anyone to question me. I have enough ‘self point of view’ on every matter under the sun to think about ‘others point of view’. As for his “fantastic” articles, thanks, but NO THANKS.

My take: I read all the beautiful posts of my blog friends, I have read some of them from the starting and I think they are “fantastic”.

As for today, I am a little wild at my parents too. It’s been a complete 4 days since I spoke to them at leisure. Both of them seem to be in a hurry to take the next rocket to Pluto. For 4 days it’s just been hello-doing good-taking care-bye-period. They don’t have time for me when I need a little of comfort to tell me that things will be fine. I understand that they are really busy but they need to know that I am not coming back as planned initially.

My take: I have my dear friends who always have time for me even at the most annoying times. Thanks guys. (the scrape goat for this episode-him and him)

Since I am already mad, I can blame it on the planet alignment of Mercury. This is the planet which rules me as told by the yahoo astrology website and it kinda monitors my doings too I guess. I have half the heart to throw stones at this planet at this time.

My take: Poor planet must be already very hot being so close to the sun. Will let him pass this time.

Well, I could add a few more things which I am mad at but I am really sobered a little now. And since I am getting my wisdom tooth, I will act a little more matured and stop cribbing. Part of life, I will survive.

But can I get some hugs???

10 steps to my current insanity

2007-01-25T21:13:00.000Z

1.I book a flight ticket with a desi travel agent long time ago. never book here ever again

2.Travel agent credits my money into her account and sends me an itinerary.

3.Just before a week of my travel, my itinerary status is cancelled for unknown reasons.

4.I call the concerned airlines and they say they never received any confirmation.

5.I call my travel agent, I mail her with all details but nothing comes back from that end. She has simply disappeared.

6.I have a few days to leave the country before I am an illegal immigrant.

7.I have to book a whole new ticket, with all the new money.

8.The tickets are doubled as it is the last minute booking.

9.I have no clue when I will get a ticket and what price. I have already lost a good share of my money.

10.I am so very stuck; I am so very screwed; I am so very MAD.

Update:Comment moderation removed after a series of uncanny mails in my inbox. Whoever wants to display their uncouth behaviour in public is welcome to do so. My friends and me will have some fun reading them.

Countdown begins

2007-01-23T18:11:00.000Z

And then comes the glorious days of never ending laziness and abundant stupor. These are the golden days where I brush my teeth-eyes closed, have bath-eyes closed, get ready to office-eyes closed, eat food-eyes closed, talk over phone-eyes closed, watch movies-eyes closed and sleep-eyes closed.

Actually, the eyes are not closed as in ‘closed’ but you get the heights of being lazy picture, right? The only time I am wide awake is when Johny boy slideshow graces my lappy screen saver. He is such a eye-opener!

This weekend saw me doing tedious tasks like eating and sleeping and gossiping in San Fernando. Now, you may wonder why I had to travel all those miles when I could have done the same in SD. I was visiting my aunt before I left the country. And there was an amchi get-together in Pasadena where tons of amchis met to eat and gossip. And I did the same and even packed the leftover.

With handful of days left before I fly back to India I am expected to pack my stuff in 2 suitcases and Singapore Airlines has generously offered 32kgs per piece. The only problem is that nothing fits in these suitcases. Agreed that I came to this country with these 2 boxes but how do I explain the stuff I have to take back? I have the heavy books which I cannot leave back, my clothes on which spent some small fortune, gifts for my family and friends and tons of chocolates. How the heck am I supposed to pack them all?
Yeah, I forgot the stuff toys that bought for myself which take the priority list. I am just moving them from one bag to another.

Not to forget that half the stuff there are the ones I got my not-so-little-anymore bro. I have literally got everything for him that took my fancy. I even got him little electronic stuff which will prove a little uncomfortable at the customs. But what the heck, I have only one bro and who else will get for him if not me. But I intend to emotionally blackmail him for all the years to come, trust me on that one.

I meeting loads of people before leaving, finishing the work assigned to me, transferring the rest and making a final check list of my shopping list. I am sorting out my things to prioritize the items I can leave behind, which I won’t be using anymore, which I don’t read, which I don’t fit in and other things. But its really hard when you bought everything with so much love, in the first place. Relocating is really hard, wrapping up is worse.

I wish I could get more stuff for my friends and family but the Singapore Airlines is to be blamed. The have given me weight restrictions and I don’t intend paying extra dollars. (This is indirectly hinting that I have not got anything much, so please don’t mind if I get you Haldiram’s sona cake).

Other than my laziness, life is jhakhas!

*Comments under moderation for a few days due to some very annoying people. Others please bear with me*

Meine bhi GURU dekha

2007-01-16T21:22:00.000Z

For over a year, I watched every single Hindi movie which was played in SD without fail. When I mean every single movie, I mean every-single-movie which was shown here. I am such a loyal movie lover. I even whistled and hooted and had popcorn and coke.

I dint miss India for once when watching these movies. How could I when the desi crowd acted so pukka desi with their intolerable antics? You enter the movie hall lobby and you see scores of desis’ waiting for the movie, some specially dressed for this special occasion. The firangi’s even asked once if there was some community meeting around, seeing the crowd. Such is the might effect of our presence.

A normal Hindi movie in San Diego goes as follows:

There are only 3 theaters where the movie is usually played, Poway or Delmar or Mera Mesa. And each movie is played only for 3 days.

~Movie will start 15 mins late than the scheduled time. Never for once did they play the movie on time. You listen to online radio till then and socialize with fellow desis’.

~Desi ads will be played for the next 15 mins. And these ads are for some Chetan Tanna to get greencard, some Reva babe and her collection, some catering service, some realtor and some jewelers’ store. Trust me; the ads have not changed for a year now.

~One aunty will come running to take the seat while you walk down decently. This happens as we have no allotted seats. If you come late, you get the privileged Gandhi seat. And these old aunts are terribly choosey about their seats.

~Some bunch of nuts will reserves seats with their coats. Just like in some local train or the amchi’s teru javan (That’s one mega community gathering in mlore for the amchi’s). Some leave their gloves, mufflers, bags, flees, and what nots; hopefully none leaves their jeans there.

~A kid would be howling somewhere in the corner. Why drag that poor little thing when he could be sleeping peacefully at home. He would never understand why the lady in the movie cries so much or why they sing and dance after every hour, anyway.

~The next kid will follow when the first kid stops. This is a rule. We need a background score of the kid howling throughout the movie.

~Some uncouth will let his cell ring with mega intensity. I wonder when we will learn the sense of public presence.

~He will actually attend the call and talk loudly. Some even go to give the details of the movie. Heights is that no one actually bothers to ask him to shut up.

~Item numbers mean more hooting and giggling. Half the crowd is that of the ‘saaptware engineers’ and I wonder why they get so excited seeing such songs. Hardware defects I guess.

~Food will flow in abundance. Yes, right from the start of the movie till the end, everyone just eats.

So yesterday was my last official hindi ‘therater-me-dekha’ movie in SD. GURU, I just loved this movie. What can I say when Mani Ratnam makes reality look more appealing than fiction. I just loved everything about the movie and I am glad that my last movie in states was one with so much substance and life.

Mani Ratnam you simply rock!
Rehman bhai, you are unbeatable!
AB boy, you were unbelievable!
Gulzarji, your words were magic!
Madhavan, you looked great!
Sherawat babe, you looked hot!
Aish, you were very different!
Mithunda, you were incredible!

This nut spends the weekend at Walnut

2007-01-15T23:19:00.000Z

I had an extremely blissful weekend in Walnut with Aunty and Maamu (Not the Munna bhai type ka’mamu’; this means ‘uncle’). I didn’t jump on their couch, nor did I pull out the well maintained garden beds, nor did I throw stones into the swimming pool and I did not pick my nose either. I simpler words, I was very well behaved. You know the kind of “good girl” teachers used to refer to in school?

They picked me up from the Amtrak station on Friday night after a 2 hour journey. Amtrak is the railway service in US which is way too expensive. Plush, fundu and expensive. And it is called Surfliner as it runs all along the Pacific Ocean giving a breath taking view of the ocean. It also has a café and a deck and very handsome ticket collectors. This explains much about my regular travels by train.

Well, aunty had cooked a spread of typical amchi food and I dived in with abandoned manners. I could explain, being a hungry, underfed, home food deprived, single, working, abla naari who just could not control her urges when the steaming hot food was served. Also to add, I spoke with mega intensity about unrelated topics. You can’t blame me when I had two very eager audiences. I went blah, blah, and blah and blah. I could not believe that I spoke with so much intensity, but I did. Must be the food.

Anyway, for the night, we settled with Kuch Kuch Hota Hai movie and I even proudly told all the dialogues. Jeez, I have no clue what had got onto me that day. Without much to say, I slept like a drunken Dudley that night. I assume that I did as the sun was striking bright on my face the next morning. I wish my mom lets me sleep late mornings when I get back home. She demands all get up early and be present for the breakfast at 8 in the morning; holidays, Sundays included. Moms.

Back to Saturday, the whole day was meant to be for shopping. Aunty had promised to take me shopping in some outlet malls. And true to her word, I was zapped out of my senses. I must have tried on tons of clothes while she patiently commented on each one of them. She even insisted that I try on a few more before I bought them. I must say I was thrilled with her enthu to get me clothes. I can be quite a pain when it comes to shopping. Result, we had a huge bag of clothes. Now, I am wondering how to pack them.

We even got a real cute pair of Reebok sneakers. When it comes to shoes, I must admit a few things. I have really tiny feet as compared to my football self. If I am lucky, I find decent pair of shoes in size 6, else I have to choose from the kids section for size 5 1/2. I don’t wear heels, I don’t like too flats either, I don’t like browns, I don’t like fancy footwear, I don’t wear sandals and I don’t buy leather. Hence, my options of footware are as limited as my knowledge of rockets. Now you know why I was thrilled. And I got a 30% discount on them. Cool!

We went to Perfumemania and I was lost with the varieties of brands and flavors available. There was a wet sand one and it is beyond my wildest idea as to why would you pay to smell of sand. Just take a dip and roll in the sand, you will smell awe full anyway. And there was some weird names and exotic brands too. After sometime I was smell blind (I dint know what you call for not having the smell sensation). But I got a Liz Claiborne- Vivid for mom. I am such a darling and plan to empty half the bottle myself. I also ended-up buying many things for gifts.

My biggest purchase was a diamond ring from Zale’s. It’s a big diamond store with stylish ladies wooing themselves with that hard cut rock. The poor me had this thing to have a white gold diamond ring for ages now and I was religiously browsing all the mega stores for good deals. Not that they dint have deals for all these months, it’s just that their deals meant I starve for a month and give my whole pay check to buy that ring. Finally I managed to save enough to get myself a minute stone and a big vacuum in my bank account.

So, now I have an 18k white gold, single princess cut diamond ring and a happy smirk on my face. And it came with a complete diamond cleaning kit and certificate. I am a happy puppy now.

Dear Guy/Mom-in-law/Pop-in-law,
I have saved you from the tedious task of buying me a ring. You no longer have to bother about the size of the ring, the pattern, the shape and other minute details. I have taken all the responsibilities of getting the right ring for myself and I am in dearly love with it. I would really appreciate if you would kindly remit the total price plus the taxes to my account. Please make the remittance at the rate of $1=Rs 43.76 as the rate of exchange per today. Will send you the bill upon request. Thanks!

Nah, I have not found the mom-in-law or the pop-in-law or the guy yet. I just found my ring, that’s all.

Maamu and me had a good time singing old songs. We sang Mukesh, Rafi, Kishorda with Karaoke all night long. We even played piano for sometime. *cough cough* for the people who are not aware of my hidden side, I have learnt classical karnatic music for 12 long years and can play keyboard with closed eyes. I just needed to get the grip of the piano and we had a great time singing many songs. I am in love with the piano too.

Dear Guy/Mom-in-law/Pop-in-law,
Please gift me with a small piano, a black one. I don’t need any more gifts and I promise to play it every single day. Mom-in-law is welcome to dance for the tunes and pop-in-law can sing along. And if you can’t get me a piano, please get me electronic keyboard instead. I have a harmonium and my parents refused to buy me a keyboard after my murderous attempt to sing every day but I assume you will be more supportive.

Since I am giving my wish list, please present me with a car too. And if you love me a lot, give me a thunderbird. I will do all the grocery shopping, jhadoo, poocha, and cooking if you gift me the bird, black one.
Thanks!

In other words, it was a perfectly blissful weekend with 2 dotting people, awesome food, super shopping and singing. Looks like my last days in States are getting very memorable. And I still have the ring hangover. *ah, the ring*

In two days time, one of my darling friends Vijay is leaving back to India for vacation of 2 months. I am gonna miss him real bad. He is my one-stop answer to stupidity, wackiness, insanity, dearness and jokes. He could make me laugh even in my most grumpy days and make me cry with the silliest things. And he is one of the very few people I am gonna miss when I will be in India.

Vijay,
If you ever read this, which is most unlikely, I am really really really gonna miss you. And you owe me chocolates and ice-cream and a small treat in Blore.

Other than all these updates, my life is taking a real lazy trend. I just can’t get myself to wake up in the mornings. I hate winters with all the chilly winds blowing and me freezing. I can’t even get myself to brush my teeth in the morning. And I can’t even think of staying out late nights. I am waiting to feel the blazing sun of my dear old Mlore. That is some heaven.

As for today, I am packing off to go and watch GURU. My last official theater movie in the US. It better be good.

Someone please get me to normal

2007-01-12T19:21:00.000Z

Between Monday and Friday I have accomplished much. I have successfully watched some 10 movies and 2 movies in half. These days when I come back from the office, the winters gets so cold on my feet that I am forced to get in the bed and watch movies. I guess such movie watching instills deep sleep patterns in people. I could use this for hypothesis testing in my research program.

I sleep early these days. My otherwise 2a.m. schedule has been moved to 11p.m. something now. Wonder oh wonders, I don’t chat either. Else, everyone on my messenger list would have got occasional pings. Orkut is hardly used owing to my lazy bones not wanting to do the scrap-scrap game. With nothing else to do, I watch random movies. Some movies are re-watched as I have nothing better to do.

I am giving myself this blissful lazy life as I know everything will change when I land in India. Mom will never let me sleep-in late or watch so many movies. I arguing that I am a responsible adult now never worked with her. Not that I am one anyway. But I am letting myself get spoilt for the last few days while I am here.

I am noticing that January is not moving fast as expected. I am counting the days here and sometimes even hours before I see that beautiful bird called Singapore Airlines which will take me home. I just hope they give good food this time. And the airhostesses are really pretty. And they put some good movie for those tiring hours. And customs don’t catch me with all those gizmos.

I am in a wrapping spree in the office. I tried to clean my desk with my personal belongings. I really felt a little sad that I was packing my belongings which stood here for all these months. I even had the chocolate wrappers I had saved when I first came here. Then there was a letter I had written to a friend which I had forgotten to post. And there were mails from my friends which I had put up on my notice board. Wrapping up is the hardest, all I can say.

Also, I have a luncheon with one of my ex-colleague who left the company sometime back. She was a great tutor when I just started my career in US. I would run to her for all my questions, work related, and system related and others too. She took me out for my first shopping experience in SD and she has the cutest little daughter. She is such a princess. And, her little son gave me a full set of Harry Potter books when I told him that I was missing home. I am thrilled to meet her today, some fond memories of my initial days in this company. And some exciting food at Black Angus!

Today I am leaving to Walnut to spend the weekend with an aunt. Now, she is not my direct aunt. I met her in our Konkani Sammelan in LA and it turned out that she was some far far relative of mine. I must say that it is an advantage being an amchi. Every other person in the community is some far relative of yours. And that’s the pleasure when you are in a far of land. Helps to have a family feeling. So, this weekend I am gonna spend with aunty and uncle who kinda dot over me. Jeez, I am such a darling when I want to be.

My manger said that the management just could not recruit a new person for my position. She said I was “irreplaceable”. My workload just had to be distributed to others. This made my day! I am irreplaceable! Yippee!

I am being consistently incoherent in my posts these days. But that’s exactly how my brainy is these days. A lot of mixed emotions and thoughts run in my mind at the same time and I am lost to the world. I never knew re-locating would be so stressful on me, personally and emotionally. I am even kinda senti about my desk and files. I will get over it soon, when I sit on the flight I guess.

For now, I am leaving to Black Angus.

Try skip reading this

2007-01-08T22:50:00.000Z

After all the revival experience of 2006 I am so ecstatic that I have decided not to think about 2007. I will just take the year in my own lazy strides. After all, I never knew about the New Year resolutions for the best part of my life, and it should be fine not to have one for few more years.

Just imagine what my resolutions would have been when I was a little kid.
*Learn to change my diappy on my own.
*Mix my own cerelac and eat 2 scoops everyday.
*Cry with more intensity such that the neighbors’ sell their house.
*Tear up any toy given to me into chote-chote tukde.
*Bite anyone who does gaga-gogo faces at me.

One very important change in my status this year will be that of relocating back to Mlore. Being more than a year in US, I am finally gonna base all my underground activities in Mlore. That too, under the very nose of my Dad and Mom. Yeah, I am expected to join them in their business while I could have been happily browsing the net in some remote planet. Things you do to keep your parents happy.

Other change would be me going back to university, this time round being a research scholar. Ever since the tender age of 3, I had a non-schooling attitude. Then I dint want to go to college. Later, I dint want to do a post-grad. Now, I end up going to “school” more than anyone in my batch. I end up with a grad, a honors, 2 post grads, few certifications and now a research program in-line. I guess it best being a student, nobody expects me to work.

This weekend I called my bro and had a decent chitto-chat with him. It’s very rare that we both talk sense. Either of us always sports a goofy mood and take turns in burning the other’s senses down with our nonsense. The intensity is kinda more if parents are around. But this week he seemed to be in a pretty sane mood and me was sobered down after 3 back-to-back movies. He gave me a list of exams he was writing before he started off with this engi degree.

It took me sometime to realize that he was not singing the English alphabets but those were the names of the exams. One was Triple E. Now, I know the triple fudge sundae, I like it a lot, have it often. I even know the triple layered Oreo cookie, just got it last week. But the triple level exam sounded too geeky. Looks like lot has changed ever since I moved from college. Jeez, I sound so old!

I went to this Vietnamese parlor to have a haircut few days back. My hair had grown much beyond its regular level and I wanted to trim down the edges. My instruction ran very clearly and slowly in good English as follows:
-no cutting short
-no much layers
-need my curls
-simple cut
-only trim
-going to India
-Mom like long hair

The parlor lady smiled brightly and said “I understand, I understand” and took charge of my long mane. Now, before I continue, please understand that I have real thick curly hair which does not resemble to any of the shampoo ads shown in TV. Infact, a friend recommended that I could use my hair instead of a broom. It had grown much beyond my shoulder level into heaps of irregular curls.

So, she cut my hair. How short you ask? Its something between a boycut and mushroom cut, curling near my ears. *I wish I could chop her hair myself* last time I had that short hair was when I was in fifth grade. One friend said I look like a bus conductor and other said I looked like a rickshaw driver. Looking at a pic with me and mickey, one friend commented that he could not tell who the mickey was. I can imagine the shocked faces of my friends when they see me in India.

I wonder what the heck did the parlor lady mean by “I understand” *sigh*.

These days my posts hardly have any sensible content in them. Something which would make me feel that I am a potential encyclopedia writer or even a K type serial write. Looks like my posts are like serial senseless.

But, all I can say is, “more will follow”.

Review 2006, life in SD

2007-01-05T21:53:00.000Z

January
*Bloggy was created after a series of emotional black mail on him
*Landed in US, my first trip outside India
*My first dollar salary. The thrill to see the green money
*One month stay in the hotel. Lonely survival for a month

February
*Shifted to my own little apartment
*Learnt the American ways of shopping
*Explored San Diego

March
*Explored more of San Diego
*My dear lappy, camera and ipod came home
*My love for Thai food

April
*Sea world rocked my life
*Attended the GSB Konkani sammelan in LA.

May
*Turned 24
*Cross country driving across 6 states
*Jagjith Singh concert in SD
*Treks to mission trails

June
*Gallivantings around New York and New Jersey
*Met my little neice and nephew for the first time
*My first cruise experience

July
*Trip to Phoenix
*Camping at Grand Canyons
*Training at Pasadena

August
*More training in my way
*Celebrated Indian independence in the firangi way
*San Diego zoo visit and more exploring

September
*Watched Hindi movies like never before on the big screen, 3 at that.
*Trip to San Fernando
*Hollywood, here I came.

October
*Trip to Santa Barbara
*Trip to Santa Monica
*Halloween time

November
*Mega trip to Portland
*My skiing adventures at Mt.Bachelors
*Thanksgiving in US

December
*Trip to San Francisco
*Seeing more places around San Diego
*Official shopping for India trip

Running post from a running nose

2007-01-05T19:26:00.000Z

So, my dear bloggy is a year old now. So what you ask?

I was randomly browsing through all the blogs that I regularly read, and many of them had either a year end post for 06 or a year beginning post for 07. Everyone gave a Rapidex course in their yearly ventures. I enjoyed reading each one of them; some witty, some hilarious, some sensible.

Mama, even I wanted to do so. So did brainy and bloggy. As for now, Mr. T is lost sandwiched between all my eccentric life. I have been busy. Busy, blowing my nose, wiping my nose, scratching my nose and such other nosey activities. I had a cold and I had fever. I still have cold but I have tied a tissue to my nose to avoid offending my keyboard.

Anyway, I am still compiling my list of to do things for 2007 and tried to review 2006. But I never went past jan in either cases. Such volatile brainy does no good. I will have to keep all my saner thoughts for later use. For now, I will go random.

I finally put down my papers yesterday. And I must say it hurt a lot. This was my first company and I landed here much before I had completed my MBA. Thinking about it, I landed in US much before I could get my convocation. It has been a tough decision for me to leave everything and go back, (here) but my manager was the most understanding when I told her about this. Two very interesting years with this company, I will miss being a part of it.

I have decided not to get senti with stuff here. The sweet people, the beautiful place, my never cleaned desk (here), my ultra sexy black compy (here), my neat little apartment (here), my messy room, my lovely bed, yeah, I am gonna miss everything. I am gonna miss even the laundry machine and the MTS buses (here).

When I told my mom about how much I was gonna miss my bed, she asked me to cargo it to Mlore. Now, how do I tell her that packing off a queen sized mattress and its spring box will cost me more than the mattress, my flight tickets to India combined. Not forgetting the wear and tear of the pearl satin finish. Moms are just so sweet when it comes to not thinking practically. And my mom stops thinking when it comes to me. She says that it’s not worth the effort.

Dad is better. He kept calling me at very odd hours to check if I was feeling well. How do I tell him that I can only sleep when he lets me sleep without calling at godforsaken hours? I have to admit, even after a year, my parents still don’t have the hang for the time zone. They ask me random questions about dinner early in the morning and about breakfast late at nights. I have given up.

Now that I am coming back, heard mom is putting back all the delicate stuff into the boxes. I have no clue why she gets such delicate artifacts in the first place and keeps them in boxes to be displayed only when I am not around. Ok, I agree that I broke a few but I am a grown up now for heavens sake.

For that matter, I had mom saying that my bro was cleaning his room and locking all his stuff. Last time I managed to get a few things from him cupboard and ever since he does not trust me. I mean, it’s just a sisterly concern to be updated with little bro’s activities.

When I think about it, I am already wondering if my parents are really glad to have me back or not. Coz, whenever I call them, they give me a new travel itinerary. My travel plans are booked till the end of may and mom plans to send me to Andaman for a visit. I hope these are not the means to keep peace at home. Anyway, I have my own travel plans.

Being Friday, I have absolute no mood to work. It’s a total different thing that I have no mood to work at any point of the week. But Friday is the official no-mood day. I feel like Garfield. I think he is the coolest cat in town. I even like his attitude towards eating and sleeping. Some people are just born with the talent.

Talking about this, many of my classmates and batch mates have already got married, in-line to get married and waiting to get married. Looks like only my set of friends have no such plans. These are my close set of girl friends who say they want to wait for the next year or so before they tie the knot. I am glad they say so; at least I have some company. Imagine all my friends get married and I am forced to accompany them with their husbands attached. The dear couples coochicoo in PVR and I am forced to stare at the screen and curb that urge to throw popcorns at them.

Popcorn reminds me, it my lunch time. I will surely post the reviews for both the years soon. Till then, please take care of you nose.

Bloggy turns one today !!!

2007-01-02T22:04:00.000Z

Bloggy invites all his friends to join him in celebrating his first ever Bday with his dear peanut butter brain and Mr.Tanhayee.

Margaritas will be served chilled with ben & jerry's monkey chunkey icey and rocher candies. Nacho lovers will have ample of cheezy bites and cookies. Harry Potter & goblet of fire will be on show.

"HAPPY B'DAY BLOGGY!!!"

Picking up life when I come back

2006-12-29T20:57:00.000Z

I'll be back home early next year, yeah it means 2007 and I need to pick my life from where I left it. I could not resist putting up a small check list of "to do" tasks.

Here I go:

-Get a mobile. This is the first thing I need to do upon landing. Get a sleek cell phone and a nice talk plan. And get back to my sms freaked friends. Cellular service in states sucks big time.

-Brush on my driving/riding skills. Right lane-left lane, I have lost touch. Need to gear up on my balance too. I dont need seat belts either, yipee!

-Review all HR and Psychotherapy books. I have lost all my touch on the clinical terms and tools. I need to get my brainy back on path. And I also have to dust the books. *sigh*

-Resume my regular pranayama and yoga classes and regular thursday sessions at art of living. I was a regualr till I moved to Blore. Now, I shall be more disciplined. *er*

-Register for the research program. I need to prepare for the JRF exams and complete all the formalities. My short term goal at present.

- Accommodate some music lessons to brush my raag-taal. My guru always said that I sang well after a break. Need to see how this long break has me tuned.

-Resume my voluntary activities for children’s camp. This is the ashram where I used to go to host training programs for kids. I guess many kids have grown and left in the past 2 years.

-Recommence my radio talk shows and discussions. The regular Friday youth shows and Konkani talks. *happy face* (They always give some light cash for my pocket money)

-Register for the FC course for skill training. I need some re-touch on the training front if I am gonna host my regular classes for kids.

-Monitor the construction of our new house. I understand this would want me to climb 10 floors every single day and accompany mom to select tiles to knob to sink to carpet. *sigh*

-Start with my trekking activities. I need to get myself in shape to resume my regular trekking. This would include the regular rounds in the stadium.

-Register for a computer class to learn a new program. I badly need some updates on the program front. Mainly on accounts if I am to help my parents in their business.

-Renew all the library subscriptions. This includes my uni liab, college liab and my dear old reader’s delight. I also need to subscribe to Reader’s Digest and CSR.

-Track down my convocations. Its strange that they have not reached me yet, in spite of all my calls to the dept.

-Develop all the imaged photos taken in US. I need to frame a few and enlarge a few. Some sweet memories for my life. *sigh*

-Rearrange my room and put back all the old things. I have to sort out and arrange all the stuff I had packed in the boxes. I doubted that mom would throw all my stuff away while I was gone.

-Dust and vacuum clean all the stuff toys. They have been packed for a real long time now and they need fresh air.

- Get a whole new wardrobe. None of the old clothes would fit me and I need to scare my designer. (I have this way too expensive tailor who has a fancy degree from Mumbai. He believes in calling himself a designer).

-Intro my lappy to my old compy. My bro bundled my old comp in the attic when he got his new comp. I need to reset the old system in my room.

-Get a creative sub-woofer system for my room. My old system is connected to my bro’s new comp.

-Bro alleges my saffire is in bad condition. I need to get a new boomer for myself. How about a thunderbird?

**The list excludes the tons of people I have to meet, my friends, my cousins, my relatives, my mom’s friends, my granny, and all the remaining muggles.

**It also excludes the list of places I have to visit and I plan to visit in the next few months.

**It also excludes the food items on my list.

**It also excludes the movies I plan to watch.

Man, I am gonna be busy. Dont I just love coming back home!

Kuch puraani baatein, kuch purane mails

2006-12-28T23:19:00.000Z

I have been into major cleaning spree for a long long time now. I dint even spare dear bloggy. Now, even my neighbors’ cat’s nose is sparkling clean and so is my lappy dear. This week I hit my inbox.
*drums roll*

When I say this week, it refers to a complete of two and a half days. The first two days were off for stalking Santa fellow and the last day is off to burn the oldie guy. So, I have no mood to do anything insane, namely work. I cleaned my mouse, mouse pad and the key board and hit the goal to clean the inbox.

Now, I have many sub folders here. Tons of official mails which are official in nature and loads of personal mails which are personal in nature. I stock my personal mails to read them on a rainy day and it never rains. *sigh* But I cannot delete them for several reasons. Some are in bits and peices and make no sense. So I was trying to sort them out or forward them to my yahoo inbox.

In the process, I found some real senti, some real stupid, some outrageously dumb, some very serious, some very sensible stuff. Many of which I had forgotten. Up on bloggy are the few which I can add without much censor. You see, its a family blog and I like to avoid volatile, insensible, mundane, sidey and indecent talk.

# Ignore the ‘doll’ part, only certain people get away with it. This guy was sane till he joined IIT. Now he is hopeless.

hello doll

in being a chivalrous creature i have terribly failed
(me) "THE LAZY-BONES" - from eons has not mailed

but woman's day brings out new thoughts in me
and sets me on a writing spree

your tumultous love life has all gone awry
nebulous form i see of a "dammu rao's diary"

but do be happy n sport a smile
never has it hurt to be a gay once in a while

compaq is good and pseud
but acer travelmate series is also nothing to brood

me too thinks will get a lappy soon
n then we can chat until in the west, sets the moon

ok my doll i have tons of work to do
but sign off i wont before a mwoooooooooo ;-*

# This one comes from my bestest friend. Nobody else could ever write so sweetly about me.

There's a girl whom I love,
Who I treasure so dear,
All it takes is a smile from her,
To make my day, perhaps my year.

Even though time conspires,
To keep loved ones apart,
The bestest friend one can have,
is my Gondu, so says my heart.

I may complain, and I do so crib,
I've hurt her feelings so much,
She takes all that from me,
And yet gives me her magical touch.

She's my joy, she's my sorrow,
She means everything, I can see.
I miss her so much, and I
Long for her to come back, to me.

This one's for you, sweetie,
Don't ever leave me so blue.
A tear in my eye, A song on my lips,
I'm always waiting for you.

# This one comes from a guy who got engaged recently. I have no clue what he was upto when he wrote this.

Hi, Guess what, I got engaged, she is very pretty, she is a girl.

# OK, I was on floor reading this one. It came from my Uni dept and one of the juniors would have written it. Watch the spellings. And I was in US and I have no clue why they sent the cd to Blore. But the mail was to the US-id. I still have not received the said cd.

hello dharmasri,

greetings from Mumbas,

we are sending you the placement cd to your bangalore office at our earliest convience.thenk you for your quick response.

regards

MUMBA2006

# Ah, this one is from my dear Dada, when I was in one of my mood swings. He is my partner in watching all the Imran Hashmi movies.

Life is like a book with many different chapters, some tell of tragedy and others of triumph. Some chapters are dull and ordinary, others intense and exciting. The key to being a success in life is to never stop on a difficult page, to never quit on a tough chapter. Champions have the courage to keep turning the pages because they know a better chapter lies ahead and most importantly you are a Champion.

If you encounter difficulty, don't change your decision to go, change your direction to get there.

# You wont belive if I say this one comes from my TL in Blore. You will not belive if I say that he made someone in the team to write this. But, he is a sweetheart. Which other TL would take you around mysore?

Tu kya apun ko kaccha khiladi samjhi hai kya??? Apun bhi smart hai.. Bangalore mera area hai aur idhar teri dadagiri nahi chalegi ...yeh baat apne bheje me dal le. Apun abhi yahan par bahut famous ho gaya hai aur sab log mere se darr te hai.. Yahan par item log apun ke upar bahut fida hai... Mangalore ki item log ko to mein jeb mein leke ghumta hoon.. Abhi mangalore gaon se bor ho gayela hai.. Tu jyda mach mach nahi karneka nahi tu copche mein leke jake kharcha pani de dega..
Abhi tu tera b'day theek se mananeka aur kuch taklif hai to Pavan bhai ko bolneka..
Apunka network USA mein bhi hai...bole to daru aur drugs ka..
Abhi tu samjh gayi hogi ki mein dedh shahana hai... Agli baar se apun ko salaam marneka aur ijjat deneka.. Yeh last time tumko maaf kaarela hai..

Abhi pyaar mohabaat se raheneka..

Zakaas,

# *Sigh* why do I have such jerky friends? My official id says its US, and this friend sends me this mail, even after attending my send-off party.

Hey, heard you flew to USA, did you really go there? And are you still there?

# This one is from my firangi supervisor who had come to India. When I came to US, he started mailing me in hindi and I have no clue from where he got the sentences.
And on this one, I have no clue why he gave me a gym session.

Namaste Mere Dosthte,
I got my run completed.....4.5 miles in 60 min. No speed records broken here. I am called a Clydedales in the running community cause I am large (over 200 lbs) and slow...I do about a12-13 minute mile. Tonight I do weights. I am tired today Not sleeping well this week. ok...back to work

"shub kaamanaaye"

# This one comes from my darling bro. I asked him to postal mail me some papers and idiot mails me about the cost.

will tell you how much postal costs
and will send u everythin...
bye

# Its only Andy who can write such things to me. And this nutty dame has been my darling for ages now. Now, what is wrong with me???

hey Gunju Baba,
Hw r u darling I miss u a lot re sumtimes I find my eyes moist while I think of our fun times together.

# This one is from my baby boo who never lets go a chance to murder my peace. According to him, I never work.

praise thee for doing work as work is something that comes rarely to you and working is something you would not want to embrace yourself with..
All the best for the off days when you have work...

# There is one lazy bone friend who thinks writing a word makes mail. This was a big mail for his standards.

Kya Hua. Aaj kal Munnabhai online nahin aa raheli. Meri wajah se wat lag gayi kya mamu?

# a dear friend sends me a count down for my return to India. (days not disclosed to surprise a few waiting souls)

well waiting for u .. just ** days to go ...

Sigh, I really have no heart to delete many of the mails. Many of the mails have been copied into word and forwarded into my yahoo id. Many of them are in my pen drive to be read later. Many of them deleted with a heavy heart. But I will have few more fun filled days before I relocate all the personal mails.

What's next for cleaning???

Confused me does no good

2006-12-22T22:01:00.000Z

Now that I have decided to come back to India early next year, I am into a constant state of thinking and re-thinking. I spend my walking hours trying to figure out if I have taken the right decision. And my sleeping hours are often spent googling my thoughts to see if I have an answer.

So, this post is all about me ranting and raving as I am still trying to put my jig-saw pieces into a proper picture. It might be hazy but that’s what I am going through at this point of time. While I am thinking of this, I am wondering if it would have been any easier posting in the bloggy without disclosing my identity. But, what the heck, this is what I am and what I will be.

I came to US for all the wrong reasons for a start. I had just completed my MBA, I was not serious about the work I was doing, I was still doing my MS in psychotherapy, and going to US seemed like a good exposure. I also had a heartbreak to nurse, and a big ego to think anything sensible and rebel for a brain. US seemed like a small get away and a big opportunity.

Coming here made me know myself better. I lived independently, thought for myself, lived my life as I liked, traveled places, gained lot of experience, grew professionally, worked on my finances, planned for my future and most importantly, understood what I wanted from my life. It was very different from the life I had always lived.

Deciding to go back is my decision, it is what I want but I am not sure if it is the right decision after all. Coming back would mean starting from a scratch, picking up life from where I left it, making a new start and accepting lot of changes. More importantly, after all the independent life I lived here, adhering to parents will be the most difficult. Not that my parents are strict, they have been the most understanding friends I ever had. But it is gonna be difficult. Maybe that is why I am have still not booked my tickets.

I have made up my mind to continue my studies which would mean the curbing of my financial independence. This will be a challenge with all the freedom I had for these years. But I know I will manage. Its gonna be tough to go back to the books, to write exams and prepare for presentations. But I have to do it now.

I have decided to stay with my parents. Not because they need me but I want to. I want to be there to stop Ma from eating sweets, I want to be there to scold her when she neglects her health, I want to be there with my Dad to laugh at his jokes, I want to be there when he sings those old songs, I want to be with my bro as he writes his exams, I want to be there as he grows.

But again this would mean a lot of things. It would mean quitting the promising career for which I have worked so hard. This would mean leaving this country of which I had dreamt as any normal student. It would also mean a lot of changes in my finances. I will be leaving back everything that I had yearned and lived. I will be going back to start anew and take all the risks.

I know I will get a job in any of the fancy companies with my profile and work experience. I know I will get a big pay package too. It may not be as thick as my current one but significant enough. I know I have my friends who will always stand by me. I know I will adapt myself to all the changes and new demands.

Coming back is much easier knowing that I have friends waiting for me. The distances and the times have not created a vacuum in our lives. I know my friends will always have a hug for me whenever I need it. They have always been there for me, and I feel secure to know that they are there.

But many things scare me. When I think of starting anew I feel apprehensive. When I think of changes in my life I feel timid. When I think of how difficult it will be to get back into track I feel wary. I am not a coward, I never was. But this will need me to be strong.

I am unsure how my tomorrow will be. I am not sure if have made the right choice. I am not even sure if things will work in my benefit. All I know is that this is what I want.

I want to come back home.

Some grapes, some wine & me

2006-12-22T04:09:00.000Z

Ever since I came to US, I have been keen on wine tasting. Not that I am much of wine person, but they said it was a very interesting experience, to taste, to smell, to see. And I dint wanna miss this experience while I had the chance.

I missed some of these chances being dead lazy to get up early in the morning, some by being lazy to go anywhere during the weekends, and some by just being un-winey.

My knowledge of wine has been limited to 'you order-I drink' types. In the process I have gathered some info on the types that I like. I like red wine. Never the dry ones. Not the very sweet one either. The one without much of grape skin. The one which creates a flimy layer on the glass. The one which is a little bitter. I like to sip real slow. No cheezy food with wine. One wine at a time.

So with this limited knowledge I have been doing pretty good so far. And I had this small urge to 'do' the actual wine tasting before I left to India. So, last weekend while travelling to San Francisco the wine valley was so inviting to resist that we just spun our car towards one of the winey for a small dose of the wine tasting.

Here is what I got.

After every harvest the fields are fertilized and prepared for the next crop. See how neatly the rows are laid.

The grape vines grow all over the place and its really cute to see the grapes hanging. They remind me of the fox and the grapes story.

Grapy from close-up. These are really old grapes which were hanging from the vine and I could not resist clicking them.

This grapy arch connects the fields, winery and the main area. It fitted ditto into the Mills & Boon romances.

The wineyard where we went for wine tasting. It was closed that day but we did do a bit of exploring around the palce.

The wine tasting lounge. They neatly arrange the bottles and label them and it indeed is a sight to watch.

Yeah, thats me! I was also singing the fox and the grapes song from my kiddo days.

Yeah I do like wine, but nothing beats Margarita heads down.

Having a wash

2006-12-15T06:01:00.000Z

After all these months in US, I had my first wash yesterday! An automatic wash at that! Can you imagine my thrill at that!?!

Well, it was not "me" who was having a wash exactly, but er, it was a friends car who was having a gala bubbly shower. But you know, we were inside and it was er, kinda exciting.

The whole process goes something like this. You pay a few dollars for that blissful shower. You drive into the furnace like wash area. The furnace actually speaks to you to pay, to drive and to stop. The furnace even moves and a me looks all zapped.

Then there is zooming sound from all directions and soapy water juts on the cary guy. Next comes the whirlling Helen's skirt like scrubber which rotates at hyper speed. The whole car is then washed with the sprinkler and next comes the last stage of drying. A huge dryer blows cyclone kinda hot air onto the car and LO!!! you car is sparkling clean.

Sitting inside the car during the shower session was a thrilling experience for me. You know, I felt like it was a dinosaur trying to get me and I was sitting cozily inside. Yeah, its insane but I cannot help it when my brainy gives such 70mm obselete waves.

Anyway, The whole 5 mins was indeed a blissful experience. I enjoyed every moment of it. I guess I enjoyed more than the 'car'y fellow himself. *sigh* if only we had something like that for us.

And for those who are celebrating my prolonged absence, continue to have bottoms up, on the rocks, or neat, all on the house. I am still continue to be with my work hangover.

Bloggy had a quick shower

2006-12-07T21:29:00.000Z

This week has seen me do a lot of cleaning. I cleaned my desk, I cleaned my carpet, I cleaned my room, I cleaned my wardrobe and I even cleaned my nose. So nothing in hand which needed more cleaning, I resorted to catch hold of my darling bloggy. Long time since I saw what he was up to.

Ever since I started to blog and read other’s blogs, my bloggy made friends with other fellow bloggies. I have been very choosy in reading most of them. And when I like a blog, I read it from the time they started-till date. Yeah, it’s kinda weird but I like to know what happened in the life of that bloggy.

For me bloggy has life. He has a beginning and he has a growth period. Many things would have happened in that time and I want to know everything about him. This is because I read him only when I relate to him. And if I can relate to him, I as well know everything about him.

Then I have a real nice pic of the person writing it. Even if I have never met or seen the hand behind that bloggy, I create my own image of the person. It makes me feel very comfortable when I read or comment on their bloggy. It helps me connect.

I like to read blogs because they talk to me about many things. some which I know, some which I don’t, some which leave me wondering, some which leave me laughing, some which I would like to experience, some which I have already lived.

So back to my bloggy, I have been thinking of deleting the links which no longer existed. Some have not been updated for months together and some had disappeared altogether. And I wanted to add the new bloggy friends that I have made. So, if you find a few links missing and new ones smiling at you, its just that my bloggy had a quick shower.

Now, what do I clean?

Ramblings around the magnetic darts

2006-12-07T05:30:00.000Z

I have had enough, just enough. The final straw was when I read the comments section of my previous post. I realised that I was turning into a deep shade of insanity. Then what else can explain the carpet cleaning post ?

I guess the winters is not doing any good to the already freezed brainy. And to top it, the work is piling itself into heaps of unsorted papyrus mountains. Not that I am taking any pains to sort them out but this gold fish sized peanut butter brain just cannot take it anymore. Winters is for hibernating, not working.

I really wanted to post about my Portland whooping vacation with 2 of my friends. I wanted to load my pics into my yahoo album. I wanted to write a series of post about the adventures we had. I wanted to write about that way-too-expensive resort we stayed in. I wanted to write about the snowy mountains and snow storms. I wanted to, but I cant, just cant.

My day starts with mails from my bossy and ends with mails from my bossy. In between these bossy deadliners, I try to accomplish some tiny winy bit of work but its as lame as Ash in Umraoo Jaan. Just tell me, how could one compare her with legendary Rekha???

As I think of Ash, I have to mention the Dhoom 2 success. I kept jumping like a drunken dudley watching the movie. Well, I agree that it did not have susbstance but gosh, it had lot of meat on show. Bips, Ash, AB, UD and Hrithik. I kept drooling big time. Half the movie I kept wondering how it would be if Johny guy had made it too.

"Bips-Johny-Bikes" -my killer formula to perfect drool!!!

I simply loved the bikes in the movie. And these days I am seen browsing Harley sites with much devotion.

"God, please let the guy I marry have a mega thing for bikes, please, please, please. I shall wash the bikes with sunsilk shampoo every week. And please make it a thunder bird, er black one please"

I have to add that these days my target practise is improving big time. I got a magnetic desktop dart board and these days the darts keep flying with hyper intensity. It even helps in regular tp in between work. Yes, I work these days, much to my suprise.

my magnetic desktop dart board

see the darty options, kinda funny uh?

While yahoo chatting today, a friend said that he wished he will have a daughter like me. Well, he does not know me much, else he woould not ask for such grave offers. My sincere sympaties for his wife. Imagine having a kid like me, completely insane and weird and demented and rowdy and untamed and insensible and incoherent and interesting!

"God, please dont listen to him for he does not know what he is asking for"

Not that I am all that bad but you know, having two like me is not a very comfortable thought. It can be very disastrous. My mom said so too, when I asked her what would she do if I had a twin. She still dreads me coming back to India.

On a very serious level of observation, I have noted that most of the bloggers that I read are writing very incoherent posts this week. Each post has no what so relevance with the usual flowy thoughtful posts. Its kinda weird that all of us are doing this as the same time. I guess its that time of the year when we celebrate the "insane posts week".

Well, I know that mine tops the list today. So I am crashing before my comments section is grueled with innane comments. *yawn*

Dharmu's magic carpet

2006-12-06T07:56:00.000Z

And I was glad that we had carpeted floors???

When I first landed in US, I was kinda impressed with the soft carpeted floors. They added a soft touch to the place and it was blissful for my bare feet. I could simply curl up at any corner and feel warm like a teddy bear.

Everytime you vaccum clean it, it would feel like a soft ball of cotton under your feet. During winters, it would be warm and you lazily rub your foot into the plush fur. Watching late night movies with a plop pillow was just too comfortable.

But, lemme tell you, even a smallest tiny drop of anything but water, gets you down on your fours to clean the spot spiky clean.

*see the ziddi daag. jaaneka naam-o-nishaan nahi.

*carpet cleaning was never so easy, sirf do boondh kaafi hain.

*aise daag, waise daag, jaise bhi daag ho, instant cleaner hai na.

For those who wonder why the 'magic carpet' title???

Kya hua is, I was thinking about a title line and brainy suddenly flashed Alladin's magic carpet. So I wondered, if I had a magicofied flying carpet, it would save me a few hundred dollars on flight tickets.
*sigh*

Why do I read you ?

2006-12-04T22:10:00.000Z

Even before I want to write what I wanted to write, what I wanted to write will have to wait because my brainy just got this irrepressible urge to write something that he’s been thinking since morning.

When I go to the comment section of a blog, any blog for that matter which lists in my link section, I often see the same people hanging out. Even if I randomly click on other’s links, I usually stumble across many familiar bloggers who often hang out in the same blog lounge.

Does that mean that people hanging out there have similar tastes as me and come there for the same reasons as I do?

Then, why do I read the blogs that I do ?

I in iceage

2006-11-30T07:15:00.000Z

Dashing through the snow
In red tube snowy edge
Over Mt Bachelors I go
Skiing all my way!!!

I am frozen. Wait till defrost.

Yankee Doodle Dandy

2006-11-21T00:02:00.000Z

Left hand holding imaginary reins, stretched out, right hand holding an imaginary whip, up in the air, sitting on an imaginary pony, I used to jump around happily, singing;

“Yankee doodle went to town riding on a pony,
He stuck a feather in his cap and called him macaroni.

*la la la la la la la*

Yankee doodle doodle doo yankee doodle dandy,
All the lads and ladies were as sweet as sugar candy.”

Yeah, I used to do that, a few decades ago, when I was a little kid. Well, little kid refers to my stage of growth when I could sit comfy on someone’s lap without crushing their bones and making them shout for mercy. Given a chance, with some kids around, I still do that Yankee dance but these days I prefer acting matured, responsible, and adult. Key word being- “ACT”.

My dear brainy was humming this tune all day long. I thought I could do some googling and hopefully would find something interesting on this song. Its that, when I am seriously working in the office and such thoughts of very worldly importance flash in my internal 70mm plasma screen, brainy simply refuses to do anything else.

# who was Dandy? Isn’t it a funny name?
It reminded me of my friend Andy, who is as crazy as me. Next time I meet her, ill sing “Kankanady poodle Andy candy”. I call her Andy-candy with love, she is poodley sweet and she stays close to Kankanady which is also famous for its mental hospital. Every thing fits in. *glee*

# and why was he called yankee doodle? How did he look like?

# which bird’s feather did he fix on his cap? The quill type looks really cute. His cap might have been brown, even his coat. I don’t even know if he had a coat on, but brainy thinks he had. And he had a round jutting nose too. And light brown hair.

# what was the funda behind calling himself macaroni? Did he like it too? I like macaronis, the cashew ones. I could eat half the packet in one go. Ma always kept a stock of them for me. This reminds me, I have to eat the halwa she sent last week.

# did the town have only lads and ladies? Where were the kids and oldies? And why were they so sweet?
I like sugar candies. Specially the ones my Bappa (dad’s younger bro) gets from Thirthahalli. They are bad for my teeth, bad for my calories, bad for my weight, but I simply love them.

I really wanted to add the lines, lyrics, audio clip, history, etc, etc, etc, in this post. But the lazy devil in me says those who are interested will surely google themselves. And I am kinda lazy today, coz I plan to write one more post at night. And, I have decided not to talk no non-sense.

So, the junta who know this nursery rhyme and have sung it with some kickoing jump dance as little kids, and are really interested to know more about it,

GO GOOGLE!!!

'Goofy day' says my desktop

2006-11-16T02:59:00.000Z

I have been very hotheaded about my desktop themes for a few months now. I religiously google for that right image to reflect my mood. And I do it everyday. It kinda cheers me up and creates the mood for the day. There are few days when I change it a few several times.

Today, out of nowhere, I got this sudden urge to have a "Goofy" on my desktop. Remember that fellow with long ears, pointed nose, pouting teeth, wearing loose clothes and laughing "ga-ga-ga-ga" ? And yeah, real long feet.

I used to like him a lot as a kid. He was good natured, funny, slightly clumsy, and a great friend of Mickey. He lived in Duckburg with his friends and they solved many crimes together. He was single and he was a dog. I even used to read his comic books and I thought it would be fun to have him around for today.

I have one more memory glued with him. My couz had painted a real cute picture of Goofy and Mickey for me. I was in my first standard then and he was doing high school. I adored this couz of mine and thought he was the smartest and hung to every word of his. He had colored this pic with the walt disney felt pens which he had gifted to me on my B’day. I had proudly glued it to my desk and displayed it to anyone who cared to listen. 19 years later, I still have those painted pics, a little faded, still glued to my desk with other small memories.

Well, back to today, I simply got a feeling that I wanted no one but "Goofy" to be my desktop mascot. Strange, I was no feeling goofy but I usually google for the first thought brainy gives me. On googling I got this pic and I happily carried on with my work. Or I thought so.

Call it a coincidence or paramnecia or deja’vu, but I have been just goofing up big time today. Every thing I did seemed to have been clumsy, gawky, crumbly, shaky and wobbly. In short, goofy. I have been Goofy today.

And guess when it struck me? Right when I was logging out of the system in the evening. And now I am wondering, with a real eeire feeling,

Is my mood the desktop or
. .Is the desktop my mood?

Mundane monday muddling

2006-11-14T00:35:00.000Z

(Disclaimer: This post was written at different time intervals and the author claims no relevance in thoughts, words or deeds.)

It’s Monday morning. *tat-ta-da*
What’s great you say?
Yeah, nothing is great. Only my mood sucks big time. When I say ‘big’, I mean gigantic mountain sized big.
Why you ask?
Simple reason. Its Monday and Mondays are all about screwed-up moods.

Well, just think about a sweet, innocent, lovely, charming, little girl who had a blast of a weekend, who would rather sleep cozily in the warmth of her blanket, who would rather watch old melodious classics, who would rather sit at home and listen to her teentaal station, is cruelly made to come to office at the unearthly hour of 8 and asked to work. Poor soul, what is the little girl supposed to do?
(Uh, that little girl is me, incase you were wondering.)

You see this Garfield? He is my wallpaper for today. I like Garfield and I think he is kinda smart in his own way. If I ever was a cat, I would have been like him. And I think Odie is the dumbest dog alive.

To emphasis more on my Monday blues, I have blue jeans, blue top, blue scarf and blue jacket. Even my bag has some shades of blue. And I have no clue why they say that blue is a boy’s color. And did I mention that I find men extremely appealing in light blue shirt, make it full sleeves, well pressed, dark black or dark blue neat cut trousers, and nothing like neatly combed hair. *drool*
"aila! mera waala belu"

Anyway, on Friday we went to a friend’s house for pooja. It was an all bachelors affair so you can imagine how disarray it would have got. First, those guys who were supposed to pick Rashmi and me turn up one hour late goofing up big time. Second, no food was ready. Third, the pooja was supposed to be a long affair. Bottom line we all were dead hungry.

Anyway, after all the chaos, the pooja was performed with all sincerity and devotion. I really had to appreciate UD for his utmost dedication to do the pooja. He even read out the whole story and explained the meanings to us. I felt like a little girl in the moral science class.

Dinner was followed by a Telugu movie ‘Pokiri’. Nope, I don’t understand Telugu but when you amidst a gulty gang (4 guys mind you), you don’t have much of a say. However, the movie was really good with loads of breaking, shaking and nerve racking violence. Some prince Mahesh Babu was the hero and I have no clue about the female dame. But she was sexy.

It was almost 3 am when we got back home and I went in for a youtube session of “Sangam”. Yeah, I love watching old movies, specially the ones which have high ratings from my dad. I love old songs and if Mukesh sang it, I will replay the songs till lappy shouts back. I am a wet puppy when it comes to old songs.

We joined Maxy for dinner, at a Punjabi dhaba and hogged to glory. Surprisingly it was raining in SD. Not pouring rains like Mlore, but okish rains for SD standards. It was cold, it was freezing and we had hot onion pakodas. This reminds me, in the movie ‘Bombay to Goa’, the huge supposed-to-be-baby keeps doing “appa, pakoda” thing. Its so funny that every time that I am traveling with my mom by train and I see someone eating, I go “amma, pakoda” till she threatens to throw me out of the moving train. Not that she would, but you never know with moms.

If you think I sleep at god forsaken hours, I get up even worse for that matter, like 3 in the noon? Yeah. And I lie back to watch ‘Sangam’ with some decent stomach filling. I am as dirty as a pig in the sty and I don’t care, coz it’s only a few months that I get to lie around to my heart’s content. Back in Mlore, mom blows her morning trumpet by 8 and if I am not up by then, I go hungry till lunch.

So, in between, I watch 2 more movies, ‘Daddy day care’ and ‘Lost in Translation’- both were good. I continue to watch ‘Sangam’ and doze off. What you must understand at this point is, ‘Sangam’ is not that lengthy a movie. It’s just that I love the songs and replay every song 2-3 times and even some scenes. So it takes triple the actual time and youtube has the movie in 23 parts, which makes it even simpler.

As Sunday is for general lazy sleeping, Rashmi and I laze around real late, and I continue to watch my ‘Sangam’. We join Maxy for “Umraao Jaan”. A spoiler for Sunday, I should say. Aish looks stunning, no doubt about it, AB looks manly, I don’t deny. But, Aish does not have that “addaa” of Rekha. Maybe I am being partial but even to this day; I think no one has that mysterious look like Rekha. I like the way she did “in aankhon ki masti mein”, and nothing can get close to her comparison. Not Aish, not anyone.

Back home, I continue to watch my ‘Sangam’. And now, that it’s done, I am watching a spree of “Guide”. The Waheeda Rehman -Devanand classic. Youtube has 24 parts of this movie and I seriously wonder hoe many days before I complete this one, with many of my all time favorites coming from this movie.

Btw, I had this piece of conversation with a friend, after which I have assured myself that I will no longer write lengthy posts or nonsensical matter. Both being subjective

Crude translation from Kannada to English:

Friend: Hi, What are you doing?
Me: (Remotely trying to make sense of the voice) uh, nothing?
Friend: Oh, that means you must be typing something, new blog?
Me: (ah, this fellow?) nope, I was watching movie.
Friend: Why do you write so many posts? That to so lengthy?
Me: uh? Do I write that much? And hey, what’s your problem?
Friend: coz I have to read it and if you write so much, it takes time for me to read.
Me: (yippee, he reads my dear bloggy) uh?
Friend: You know what; I think you were a typist in the courtroom in your previous life.
Me:uh? (he actually said that?)
Friend: yeah, the ones who just go ‘tak-tak-tak’ with their typewriters. You do the same on your laptop.
Me: Do I? DO I?
Friend: Yeah, you do. And you write way too much.
Me: (He has not read the others) Meet me next time, I’ll tell you.
Friend: yeah, and I guess you will even put this up in your blog.
Me: duh.
Friend: Hey, bye, I have to read your blog.
Me: Uh??? (He actually said that?)

Now that it is almost evening and time for me to go home, I guess Monday is not all that bad. (Yeah, I have been writing this post in-between my breaks). I have something to look forward for the evening, library, laundry and yeah, “Guide”.

My experiments with projects

2006-11-11T01:02:00.000Z

A few months back, one of my friends had mailed me asking, if I could guide 2 students in their projects. I have been doing the “come, lets projectofy” work for 3 years now. I even had a senior dumping his thesis upon me for review. My love for projects was the result of doing some tedious projects under big banners for 5 years to be apt.

These guys happened to be my friend’s- friend’s brothers, (some close association uh?)doing their MBA in Pune. They were doing some project in communication systems and were keen if I could help them. My friend had given them a mega update on my student life with the projects I had completed. And the twins were really impressed with my profile and even hoped if I could refer them to any of these companies.

Well, I had no issues in guiding them; in fact I like to assist in projects. But the issues with me are; I am a stickler for perfection when it comes to projects, assignments, presentations and the like. If other days see me writing hapless spelling and senseless grammar, presentation sees me eyeing for that tiny little dot. I need every single word, every single line, every single punctuation, every single break, every single page number to be perfect.

I was such a leech that my Project Guide blindly signed my thesis saying if I was satisfied with my work, he had no issues. Er, for the previous year’s project, I made him review my work 3 times before I was satisfied that his review was to my satisfaction.
For the paper presentation in Coimbatore, I made such a fuss that even my neighbor’s dog knew the paper by heart. And the time that I was doing a project for TAJ, their Excellence Model was battered under my very hands. Get the idea? I am that bad when it comes to my submissions.

Now, these guys wanted me to help them, not knowing what they were asking for. I laid down the rules and I threatened them that at any point if they don’t work up to the standard set by me, I shall not assist them. They agreed and I was ready to torture the two poor souls. Its not daily I am given legal permission right ?

They sent me their project proposal and started with my Scrooge eye’d supervision.
That line does not make any sense. You can format that. Just follow the format I mailed you. You need to do a word check. Give proper page breaks. Use management terms. Redo the proposal. Yeah, I made sure they cursed me after every mail.

Finally a project was ready. They sent me final “thank you” mail and sent a “all the best mail”. Done.

I totally forgot about them and their project.

After months, yesterday I got their mail and I was surprised big time. They had received a certificate for ‘Exceptional Performance Appreciation’ for their Project and also a job offer from the same company. They had scanned and attached the certificates for me and sent a small Thank You note. To top that, their paper on M-communication was selected for the international conference in Barcelona, Spain.

Man, I was happy and I was proud. This was not my paper, not my project, not my recognition. But I was happy. I had never expected that these guys would ever contact me after the hard time I gave them. I never even expected them to mail me or thank me. Their mail was a much cherished happiness for me. Not because I helped them, but they remembered me and mailed me with their progress.

Seeing both their scanned certificates made me feel very proud at the two guys whom I have not met or seen or even been in contact for months. It simply made my day to know that I could be of some use to someone.

All I had done was to share with them, what little I knew and had done as a student. I never thought it made any difference to anyone but me. I always did things for myself because I wanted to be different. I wanted to sit back and appreciate my work myself. I wanted myself to be satisfied with the work I had done.

Their mail was a reward in itself for me. I felt a sense of happiness that I was of some small help to someone. I guess this happiness is more than any other material happiness that I would get. I realized for once that it is all about giving and sharing. That’s how we grow.

Thanks, Anup and Anuj, for giving me a chance to grow; Thanks, for making a difference to my life; Thanks for making me proud!!!

a/s/l please ?

2006-11-09T00:49:00.000Z

A few years ago, when I was a student, I had made an online friend by name Renz. I happened to come across him in one of the common chat confy and we added each other. Slowly, we became friends and started chatting with each other for hours.

We would log-in at night and chat about the whole day’s activities. If one of us would be late that night, we would leave off liners for each other. My day was not complete if I did not update renz with the latest happenings.

Dharmu:renz, pata hai, I am going on a diet program from tomorrow
Renz: haan? I thought you were already on one since last week
Dharmu: nahi re, that dint work out, will do it from tomorrow
Renz: oh, ok, so you start a diet program every week?
Dharmu:shut up

Renz: shree, pata hai, aaj me coffee day mein tha, and a girl smiled at me
Dharmu:really? There are girls in Ahmbad? , there is a coffee day too? And a girl really smiled at you? Wow
Renz:shut up

And we used to tell each other about every single damn thing that happened in our day. That shoe on sale, that assignment which made no sense, that song with silly lyrics, the hike in petrol price, the class bunking I did, that cousin of mine, his neighbors dog, the smell of that soap. He even wrote me mails in german to practise his newly learnt language and I read my speeches to him. Neither complained nor gave an excuse for not being there for the other.

We had never met each other, not even seen each other but we were there for each other all the time. It was very easy to relate to each other. We both were going through a similar phase in life.

He was a MS aspirant pinning his heart to go to US, I was MBA aspirant slogging myself with CATs and dogs. We both were working out our today, apprehensive about our tomorrow, and unsure of our future. We both had almost the similar dreams in eyes, hope in our hearts, and undying urge to prove ourselves.

We supported each other in many ways. When one would feel low, the other would always have a few comforting words, when one was happy, the other patted his back, when one was in tears, the other gave a shoulder to cry, when one had a heartbreak , the other had a huggy smily.

For a long time, we shared all our secrets, fears, joys, sorrows, happiness, dreams and hopes with each other. It was pretty different sharing with a unseen, unmet, unknown friend. We had not met each other, we knew no one in common, and we lived in different worlds.

Slowly, the years passed and we moved in our own worlds. We kept in touch, mailed each other, chatted at times, updated about our life, but moved on. Our life took us in total different directions and we were lost with our new life. Occasionally, I would remember him and give a silent thanks for being there with me when I need someone, and maybe he did the same, I never knew.

Two days back, I got this real bad urge to track him down and talk to him. I wrote him a big mail and he replied with a bigger one. Much to my surprise, he came online and we both chatted for 3 hours straight.

Now in London, he is earning big money, sitting on a big chair and ghumaaoing girls. He gives me a complete update on his life and I am amazed with the changes in him. I give him mine, and I guess he thinks I am inaner as ever. I don’t blame him.

We talk about how far we have come, how life changed, how we have fared, how we struggled and how different it is. Somewhere, I realize that we have not changed at all. We still talk to each other about the same things in the same way. He tells me how stupid I am, and I tell him how I would have loved to bash him up. We laugh together on the silliest things and remind each other about how silly we were. I realized I did miss him.

Talking to him just made my day today. It feels good to know that we still share the same bond and love, in spite of the distances and time and years. It feels good to be talking to someone who has known you through your bad times. It feels good to be myself and never think about others. It feels good to write lengthy mails about nothings. It feels good to laugh together at the old times. It feels good not to have grown.

Renz, THANKS FOR EVERYTHING!!!

Bloggy of a little belle

2006-11-07T21:17:00.000Z

Friday

Dear bloggy,
I had a very fruitful day in the office today. Meaning, I ate lot of fruits which the client had got. I dint even leave that tiny baby grape which was hiding under the pineapple crown. I completed all the diaries, mails, reports and other tasks which were supposed to be completed as few weeks ago.

Back at home, I was watching Robin Hood and his adventures in Sherwood forest when Rashmi said that we were joining UD for dinner. I like UD, he is a nice guy with lot of insane thoughts like mine. And he always talks about photography(I like), astronomy(I have no clue), stars(out of my brain), and other mega weighing topics.

We had dinner in my favorite Thai restaurant. I like this Thai place, they make very good red-curry. They also have green-curry, yellow-curry, duck-curry, pineapple-curry and other colored curries. Its only after UD pointed out, I realized that this place was called “Di Chak”. For me, it was always “Thai place where B works”. B is a waiter there. I have no clue why she is called “B”, but that’s her name. I might be Bee, Be, Bie, Bei, I am not sure. And off late, they have reduced the quantity of their pearl Thai iced tea.

After dinner we came back home and watched a few Kannada rock songs by Rajkumar on youtube. I like youtube coz it helps me watch all the old songs, new songs, movies, ads, and nope, I don’t watch sleazy stuff. I don’t have time for it. It’s like my Santa Claus. Well, watching rajkumar dance to those ridiculous tunes with equally outlandish lyrics, made us gape for air. We were literally on the floor. UD even managed to dance a few steps to Shammi Kapoor’s songs.

Late at night, I watched the movie Troy and even watched all the special editions given with it. I liked Brad Pitt and the other guy, who was called the tamer of horses, he was the prince. It was a beautifully made movie. I even liked the greekish language, elegance of the palaces and the whole dishum-dishum thing.

Saturday

Dear bloggy,
I got up late. Every weekend when I have nothing else to do, I get up late and so does Rashmi. We tried our hands on making pancakes and were amazed at our success. After an elaborate breakfast, we resorted to mission-clean home. We are cleanliness freak and our pride is our bathroom. Once a friend said that it was so clean that he could sleep there. Yes, we clean our bathroom more frequent that cleansing our faces.

I have to mention the laundry situation for today. Our laundry room has 2 washers and 2 dryers. One terribly insensible couple had loaded all their stuff and never bothered to remove it. We were uptight about the inconvenience caused and dumped all their stuff on the side shelf and did our laundry. I don’t appreciate people causing nuisance to others, specially to me when I am busy.

Mridula, Prashant and Nandu landed late noon as supposed to have come by lunch time. The three are so much fun and it’s really surprising to see how we 5 have bonded. We did more of talking, fighting, freaking and non-chelating chattering. We decided to go for salsa club at 8.30 but dint make it. UD joined us for dinner and we went to this desi fancy restaurant called Ashoka. The food was good and we hogged to glory.

Late night saw us promenading around Downtown in search of a suitable club. On a final note we agreed on a hip-hop place called Ranch. It had a live dj and music was good. I say the music was good, coz I knew 3 of the songs played there. Yes, I agree I have a bad knowledge of this bang-dang music and I don’t make efforts to know them either.

We then drove to harbor drive and took a stroll along the Sea Port village. I really liked this place with its miniature cottages and village like setting. There was a small bridge, small stream, a small fountain and all that villagy jazz make-look.

Sunday

Dear bloggy,
we were still on the harbor drive and we were acting crazily insane at the unearthly hour. Nandu gave me a piggy-back ride and I was really concerned about his back. Mridula kept on arguing for reasons known only to her. Prashant gave gyan session on the million dollar yachts and boats and Rashmi glimmered with wonder.

We finally drove to the Star of India museum-turned-ship and drove in circles in search of the right road. We de-toured when we found a drop-down road and tried doing the roll-a-coaster drive and I must say it was fun.

We drove, and drove, and drove, and drove and we were lost. Yes, we were lost and miles away from no-where. At the early hours of dawn, we came back home, had steaming tea and crashed on the bed.

All of us got up late and lazed around hungrily for breakfast. It was pancakes (again), scrambled eggs and coffee. Then, we lazed around again. We watched more songs on youtube, saw more of Rajkumar’s rocky dances, laughed insanely, saw google funny ads, laughed more and fell asleep.

We went for a late lunch to Bismillah and laughed more. Later in the evening we had group hug sessions as it was time for the 3 people to leave back to Thousand Oaks. After all the- miss you, hug you, bye bye, Rashmi and me curled up for a evening snooze. Abhi came at night for a small chat and we laughed more.

Late at night, I watched a movie, Love actually, was impressed big time with the way they projected relations. And, then, finally, I slept.

Trick 'o' Treat

2006-11-02T06:10:00.000Z

Past one week saw several posters with smiling pumpkins adorned on the walls around our office. Me says me thought that they smiled with page 3 glee. It was Halloween time and our office was bubbling with pumpkinish feat.

A scare crow fellow stood grinning near the entrance complete with his hay cap and toote coat. A basket full of goodies and candies sat heavy in one corner. It kept refilling itself all through the week and it was fun to pick the chocos. Our clients got goodies all through the week and it was a merry time around. Oh, I loved the festive mood.

I was quite thrilled with the whole concept of Halloween. You get to wear costumes, go around with pillow cases, trick people and they treat you with goodies. Not bad. My last disguise being a decade ago, when I was a student was quite a memory, er, for a part of some ucanny devil. Well, I perfectly agree that I dont need to 'disguise' myself as anything scary, it comes just 'naturally' to me. I was born eeirie.
We had to dress up in costumes for this D'day of Oct 31 and I was pretty excited with my possible makeover. After much attempts of googling a costume, I simply decided on sticking to my natural self.

My look- black salsa multi-layered cut skirt, black boat neck top with boot cut sleeves, pointed brown boots, black witch hat, black net stole and grinning me. I looked scary enough. A collegue helped me with some 'do' for witchy eyes look and Lo! I looked stunningly witchy. A vampire would surely propose me with that devish look.

I roamped around the office with a yellow mop calling it my 'thunderbolt' and chuckled insanely when people nearly jumped out of their skins looking at the alluring look of mine. I wondered if I would get my letter from Hogwarts someitme soon. I even know the rules of quidditch better than that of cricket. And I even loved those suprised looks that muggles gave.

Back to the office scene, we had every one dress in real fundu costumes. Every one was sportive and dressed themselves in truely 'unlike their normal' self estyle. Even the supervisors were dressed in costumes and it was real fun to breathe the Halloween fever in the air.
Even better was the wide spread of lunch which we ate with hungry bliss. Pumpkins made their mark everywhere, posters, pie, tables, salad, eeks. As usual this grass eating cow had to stick to her collection of roots, shoots, stem and leaves.
There was a Hat making competition and I made a aweful replica of the Egyptian crown. I am not sure if they ever had something like that, but to my brainy's 70 mm screen it looked very Pharaohish. It even had some funny hangings in the back.
We had a ruffle game to give away goody baskets and many got lucky. Each of us had to model our 'creative' hats and everyone hooted wildly. We even had prizes for our costumes under 3 categories and her highness won the 'scary witch' title. Lucky me got my hands on a big basket of chocos and I literally was hopping around for the rest of the day.

At home, my Mr.Pumpkin sat glowing on the doorstep waiting to trick and treat the kids who were "supposed" to come. *sigh* our apartment complex does not have kids and now, we are left with whole bunch of candies.

*knock*knock* anyone in for a trick 'o' treat ???

Glowing Mr.Pumpkin

2006-10-31T07:30:00.000Z

Halloween is here and Mr. Pumpkin gives his 6 easy steps to a glowing party.

1. Bright orange, round, little Mr.Pumpkin is ready for his makeover. A small tuft on his head gives him a neat crop look.

2. Cleansing treatment for Mr.Pumpkin to remove the seeds & pulp. Smooth cut in his base helps to file him neat.

3. Mr. Pumpkin gets shapely eyes, sharp nose and smiley mouth carved with a sharp edge knife.

4. Luke warm water bath for Mr. Pumpkin before the finishing touches. Scrub him dry with a kitchen towelette.

5. Mr. Pumpkin is ready, neat and clean for his finishing touches. He smiles brightly looking forward to his party.

6. Party time!!! Mr. Pumpkin glows brighty with a fresh rain scented candle.

No more senti twitters

2006-10-31T01:07:00.000Z

I thought I was getting way too senti with all those mushy posts back-to-back. First on my bro, and then on some hearts fluttering chirpings above my head kinda stuff. This does no good to my image of being a Hero.
(I have no clue why I fancy myself calling that, but a few of my weird friends in office started calling me “HERO” and ever since I like to stick to it.)

Instead, I could be giving updates on how I religiously browse the Harley Davidson site for the latest bike updates or compare the features of Royal Enfield bullets. Even better, how I hunt for good deals to Andaman Islands, or simply drool over the Johnny boy. Yeah, that’s makes me look perfectly “ME”- weird and different.

With the change in the Pacific Time zone this Sunday, my sleep cycle is still getting adjusted to the huge difference of 1 hour. I don’t mind sitting late, but getting up at the unearthly hour of 7.20am does disasters to me. I simply cannot get up in the morning. That skimpy dressed Sherawat babe may take to Ramananda Sagar’s next epic, but I simply cannot get up. I cannot, I cannot, I cannot.

Considering the fact that I spend the best part of my waking hours at my desk, I keep it quite messy. Waking hours because the remaining part of the day sees me snoring with my eyes open or eyes closed. Messy because I need all the things that I want strewn within an arms reach. It does not matter an inch in my soul if it looks like a cannibals unkempt head. Often, I have to run amok the considerable heights of piled junk to find the “wanted” thing, but that does not stop me.

Today, I got into this valorous task of putting some order into my work dockyard so that I could actually “see” the stuff properly and work on them. Simply because we have an audit coming up and I-me-myself could not make sense of the spread junk. I was prepared for a stray spider or fly or roach, not that there would be any. So, I worked my sleeves up.

In the process, I realized a few things which have been there, randomly placed, around me, making my day a little more bright in their own simple ways.

The list poops up here.

1. A family photo with my Dad, Ma, Bro and me- Its that very typical kind of family wala photo where everyone is smiling bright. Every time I look at it, I tend to smile back and feel a sense of security. I simply love the bright colours in the photo, the red saaree of mom, white tee of dad, red tee of bro and pastel green for me. Even the diwan cover looks bright in bandani red.

2. A small idol of Lord Ganesh- sitting high on my desktop. This was given to me by Ovi and Karen when I was leaving to US, wishing me luck. I still remember that last day when we sat in Pizza Hut, with me counting the last few hours before my flight. I had poured my heart out to these two darling friends of mine, told them about my nervous beats and how much I was going to miss them. Especially because Karen and I had once planned of coming to US together and now, I was going alone. I always start my work with a small prayer wishing for a fruitful day of work.

3. I have a pretty card saying “101 reasons what make you a great friend” given to me by a dear friend, Dhaval some 5 years back. Now, in London, he might be of a different opinion as I have not mailed him for ages. But this bright card always reminds me of my college days, my friends, and my life back at home.

4. “Dearest Dampoo, much is expected from those to whom much is given” says a small loving mail from a person whom I respect a lot. When I was in Blore, my team lead Malcolm was a great tutor and inspiration for me. I was always inspired with his enthu and zeal and even now, he sends me a regular mail, brightening my day. Now, he is the managing director of a firm in Mysore and I run to him whenever I need some gyan.

5. A printout of a mail sent by my dear Chikku saying “True Friendship” always gets a smile from me. It’s a senti mail coming from a person who never ever shows much emotions and I really wonder how much he would have gone out of his usual nature to send me this card. The words he has written “with lots of love” always gets me a little mushy.

6. A holiday picture of dad, ma and me in Salem when I was much saner, younger and er tolerable. It was clicked 7 years back and I was trying to climb into the bonnet of the car.

7. One pic my bro gave me, of him and me. Me smiling at him and him glaring and standing tall above me. I love this pic coz he looks adorable(as usual).

8. A printout of the post which Dev had written for me. I have the entire post by heart by now with the umpteenth times I have read it. It simply makes me happy to read this post.

Each of this gives me some happiness, some stray sighs, some smiles, some cheering, some motivation and some moments of myself. Each of this, makes a part of my life.

Am I senti again?

Finally, to my relief, my desk is much manageable with some sense restored into it. Hopefully I will be able to find the things I want without much circusgiri. Aila! did I term a new word?

How do I tell you?

2006-10-27T09:06:00.000+01:00

Call me insane if you want. Nah, I wont deny. But I could not let this one pass, even if I had to tear myself from the warm comfy of my blankets and slumbering sleep, silently, 1 in the night. I had to say it now, or maybe I would never.

I am no poet and I am no charmer. Just close your eyes and listen to my heart... all that I have to tell you...

"do I tell you how bright my day is when I think of you; do I tell you how my heart skips a beat when I hear your call; do I tell you how wonderful it is to hear your voice; do I tell you how restless I get when I dont talk to you; do I tell you how I wait for the time to tick away slowly; do I tell you how I save each of your pics you send; do I tell you how eagerly I wait for the weekends, just to talk to you; do I tell you how much I hang to every word you say; do I tell you how much I love to hear you laugh; do I tell you how dearly I save all your voicemails; do I tell you how happy your thoughts make me feel; do I tell you how much I wish I could make your day a little more bright; do I tell you how eager I am to meet you after all this while; do I tell you how special you are to me; do I tell you or I dont "

Oh, how do I tell you???

Between THEN and NOW

2006-10-26T00:57:00.000+01:00

Then, I held the li’l him tenderly in my arms and wondered how tiny he was.
Now, I see him grow tall and handsome and wonder how wrong I was.

Then, his little eyes followed my every move and smiled with innocent glee at my attempts to make him smile.
Now, he makes me laugh with his jokes and roars with laughter all the while.

Then, he held my fingers tight as he took his first steps.
Now, he can crush me tight in an embrace and make me grasp for my breath.

Then, I waited for him outside his class, to walk him home.
Now, he waits in Mlore, telling me to come back home.

Then, his face brightened up every time he saw me waiting for him.
Now, my day brightens with a small off liner or a li’l h from him.

Then, he came to me with his coloring books and asked me to help him paint.
Now, he sends me interesting links, how very quaint.

Then, the little him asked me to get chocos for him when I came back from school.
Now, he tells me not to spend much on him, camera or computer tools.

Then, he wondered with surprising eyes how I could explain the rotation of the fan so easily to him.
Now, I am amazed when he tells me so much about techy stuff and I learn hella lot from him.

Then, he asked me what gift for B’day I would give him.
Now, everything I buy gets a suggestion from him.

Then, I used to tell him songs and stories to put him to sleep.
Now, he sends me latest songs for updated I need to be keep.

Then, I used to take him to his tuitions and coaching’s on my bike.
Now, he tells me he will drive me around when I come back.

Then, I used to let him use my old color box.
Now, he tells me I can have his brand new updated comp.

Then, I used to cuddle him lovingly on my lap.
Now, he gives me the moral support with a pat on my back.

Then, I would tell him that I would share my desk with him.
Now, he tells me that I can have his room without any trouble from him.

Then, for his pencils, ice creams and chats, I would pay.
Now, he discusses my savings, money and my salary pay.

Then, I would support him with all the reluctant parental decisions.
Now, he assures me that he will be on my side in all my decisions.

Then, he would ask me to pick up his jeans and tees for color dress.
Now, he tells me what kind of clothes I need to wear to impress.

Then, he would ask me what I thought of his friends.
Now, he tells me that he approves of my choice of friends.

Then, he would run to me for every small problem and ask for my opinions.
Now, he listens carefully to me and tells me what he thinks of my actions.

Then, he would ask me for help with very simple words.
Now, he tells me about global issues and how science works.

Then, I would cook for his friends and take them out.
Now, he chats with my friends and scraps them throughout.

Then, he would ask me the difference between physics and math’s.
Now, he tells me the percentile ranking of different colleges and the CAT’S.

Then, I would ask him about his friends and their evening plans.
Now, he askes about my marriage and my future plans.

Then, I was his protective big sis and he my darling li’l bro.
Now, we are friends and together we grow.

Ek night ki baat

2006-10-25T00:57:00.000+01:00

I get a call around 11.30 am (SD time) from a friend who is traveling Mlore-Blore, night journey, single sleeper, non-a/c.

(some crude translation from konkani to english)

He: Guess what? (aww, don’t I just love to hear that voice)
Me: Don’t tell me that you want to use the restroom? (Given his record for basic instinct release urges during the bus journey)
He: Nah, this one is much funnier.
Me: Hm, the girl next berth found herself cozy on you? (Poor soul has been dreaming of this without any luck)
He: Nah, I opened a coke bottle and it frizzed all over my pants.
Me: great!!! (Grinning wild as 70mm screen in my brainy, randomly projects the “oh, what the heck has he done in his pants’ looks he would get)

For the Mloreans working in Blore, the night bus journey is a monthly routine, give or take a few weeks. You take the night bus from any corner of Blore, snore through the length of the journey and open your eyes in the morning, and Lo! You are in Mlore.(or vise versa). Occasionally, you stop in Hassan/Sakleshpur for a quick restroom visit or night cap chai. Nothing like a hot steaming cup of tea on a chilly night.

For me Mlore-Blore travel was much habitual. I traveled back to Mlore every week such that I knew all the drivers of the bus as well as they knew me. I had a good deal from Vishal Travels (route D) with an allotted single seater #17 booked for me all year through. This ensured that I had a seat booked unless I cancelled it (which happened very rarely) for half the regular price.

I also can mention that the bus people always waited for me as I always made it a point to make a grand late entry. After the initially weeks of waiting in vein, the travel agent made it a point to give me a reminder 30 mins before the scheduled time. He said he even knew my cell number by heart. I was such a deemed customer, you see.

To broadly classify the types of options you are make avail of, you have single seater, double seater, single sleeper, double sleeper, a/c, non-a/c, in permutation & combination ratio. They even have ultra tech names like Volvo, high tech, airbus, and some other fancy things which make every travel the same with the drenched roads along the journey.

Being a regular, I had made “bus friends” who traveled by the same route. Almost all of us had the regular seats allotted and we usually had some casual talks regarding the roads, buses and bus price. Well, even if I wanted to ask that cute guy if he was still single, I could not risk my ticket being voided. So, I usually stuck to much general topics.

With the day's tiring work and the possible fact that the 13th pair of chromosome in my DNA has “sleep” as its genetic code, I sleep as a drug doused horse. Well, how else will you explain my gleeful sleeping even when half the bus would be tossing uncomfortably over the disruptive roads?

Anyway, a quick googling kind of search on my brainy’s search engine gave these results.

# There was this one time when I slept so soundly that I woke up in Padubidri, some miles away from Mlore. Well, I had a nice breakfast there and traveled back for another 30 mins before I reached home. Reported the delay to parents as tire puncture on the Ghats.

# The other time, I got down in such a jiffy that I forgot the luggage inside the bus. Since the only contents in the bags accounted to loads of unwashed clothes, I found it safely returned.

# One time when my single seat (remember me mentioning #17 on Vishal route D) was given to some other person by mistake, I demanded my money being returned, gave such a scary fight to the agent that I earned a free journey to Mlore. Additional perk, I got 2 seats to myself. I know I am scary, but no one gets away with my seat.

# My dad always made it a point to call me early morning to wake me up. He was always worried if his li’l baby would oversleep and miss her stop. Aww, my darling dad, he forgets that his baby is a devil of the nth order.

# There was one time that I slept so soundly that I fell from my seat, dhum, in the middle of the night. I guess I had woken half the bus with the sound and my small scream. The driver switched the lights on, and I dutifully got back into my seat without much qualms. I was so sleepy that I did not notice the small lump on my forehead till the next morning.

# I have to mention the time I saw, rather heard a couple try to “make out” in the bus in a seat adjacent to mine. I had a good mind to switch on the lights and have a good show. But, being the decent girl that I am, I restored to sleeping mode. The next morning, they were gone before I could have a better look at them.

# Once, during the journey, the fellow sitting behind me, dared to make some liberal moves with his hands and legs. At midnight, when I had reached the limits of my tolerance, I woke half the bus with my fuming rage such that he was tossed to the extreme back of the bus. I doubt if he ever dared to play smart with any girl ever again. I loathe such cheapos.

# One journey was very memorable with 4 of my friends traveling with me. We never slept half the night creating mega nuisances on the bus, till we feared that we would be thrown out.

# My frustrating journey was when the bus was delayed by 5 hours due to some accident on the Ghats. I had no water, no cell range, no chocolates, no book to read and no sleep. It was my worst experience.

# Not to forget that one time when a fellow was on call with such abandoned sense of being a trouble to others, meaning he was too loud. I walked to him with a “look” and told him that if he spoke so loudly, he dint need a cell, the other person could hear him without any aide. It was enough for him to cut the call short and apologize and me sleeping in peace. I guess a couple of passengers gave me some silent thanks too.

# One funny experience I could add was when the guy sitting in front seat was relating the days event to his mom in Konkani. He took immense pain in giving complete details about the bus, his seat, the passengers, adding that one pretty girl was sitting behind him (as if the poor mama’s boy was in tow for a kidnapping). I dutifully got up and thanked him. It was worth seeing the “oh shit, she is a Konkani too” look on his face.
Aw, don’t I love to acknowledge the compliments!

# One time I was coming to Mlore with a friend, with whom I had some tiny-winy fight over the dinner thingy. He had his dinner and I dint coz of his bad timing and poor soul had packed a dosa for me. I was fuming mad at him for turning up late and me missing my dinner. Two guys sitting behind us were peeping with such interest that I asked my friend to feed them the dosas. So much for being hungry.

# There was one time when the luggage compartment of the bus got locked and I had to go all the way till the bus depot. That was one time when I dint fight with the driver of the inconvenience caused, rather went to a friends place close by for breakfast.
Well, I can be sweet when I want.

Yet, the journey was fun, every bit of it. When I was coming to US, my Blore travel agent gave me a Diary Milk bar to wish me luck. Er, he did ask me to get chocolates for him too but it was really very sweet of him.

Anyway, upon my return I would be doing more of nightcaps and I guess that I am destined to have Mlore-Blore night travel all my life. *sigh* some things never change. But hopefully the roads would be better by then and Vishal Travels would give a better deal this time.

And, hopefully my friend’s khakis’ are dried by morning.

Just a sigh*

2006-10-21T00:11:00.000+01:00

For the first time today, in the life of my bloggy, I deleted a entire post I wrote. I always wrote what came to my heart, just bindas, never ever thought what the person reading it would comprehend of it.

Would he think I am insane to personify my brain and blog? If I am stupid to crib about missing home? If write as well as any third grade student? If my grammar resembles that of Wren and Martin’s? If my use of language gives a run to any Webster’s thesaurus? If he thinks could use my time in more fruitful activities?

Nothing.

I just wrote, for myself, for my happiness, for my satisfaction. I wrote to pour my heart out, I wrote to make myself laugh, I wrote to tell the story of my life, I wrote about everything that makes me what I am.

Today, I changed that. Today I deleted one post which I had written with lot of love. I did not even save it in my word pad or blopost. I simply deleted it, without a second thought or a remotest qualm. For the first time, I felt that I dint want to share something, a memory.

Or, am I scared to accept it myself?

Looney Toony day

2006-10-20T00:52:00.000+01:00

I was in a very chirpy mood today. Infact I was in a very good mood to flap my hands and hop around like a bunny.
*hop hop hop*

So, googled (yes, google can be used as a verb too) to create my desktop mood. This new interest of mine is definitely getting exciting as I hunt for “that” one theme which suites my mood perfect. Many a times, it helps me to do some random timepass too. (er, I guess I should not have mentioned that). But I must confess, it helps big time to make me happy amidst all the boring, never jerking work.

So, lemme take a break and do a 5 second “silence prayer for google”
1-2-3-4-5.
*done*

Today, I fished a real cute bug’s bunny, gleefully smiling at me. His bright colors were perfect for today, a Thursday. He had his teeth jutting cute, a very naughty smile, and bright orange tee. I even tried to pull out my teeth like he did, but the hind thought that people around might come to inane conclusion about me, stopped my very interesting activity for the day.

This fella, however reminded me of “who suhane bachpan ke din” when I was much younger, much saner, much sweet, much er, less weighing?

Looney Tunes show was one of my all time favorites. This show was telecasted on cartoon network around 12.45pm and I used to rush home with my bro for the lunch break, and flank ungraciously on the sofa and sing the tunes, much to my Ma’s agony.
My bro and me would religiously sing all the tunes, complete with “tin tin”, “pe pe” , whatever the tunes were.

Everything about the Looney Tunes was funny. The chase, the adventure, the disasters, the efforts, the stupidity, the smartness, everything made it fun to watch.

It’s been ages since I last watched these shows, er, say 9 months?

I did a quick rapid fire on my brainy to scoop up my fav toony characters:

1. Wile Coyote and his hunting experiences.
2. Foxy sir with his disastrous Acme kit.
3. The “pe pe” of our road runner birdie who always zoomed by with amazing dusty speed.
4. The Daffy Duck and his adventures.
5. The Porky pig in his sparkling clean hat and coat.
6. The big gang of the tiny toons
7. Sylvester, the dear billa maama
8. Granny and her investigations
9. The cutie sweet tweety bird.

Don’t I miss watching them, *sigh*
Don’t I miss toony singing, *double sigh*
Don’t I miss being li’l again, *super double sigh*

“I thoth I taw a putty kat,,,,,yet, I deed I deed”

Any guesses???

Visacard:Everything::Priceless:?

2006-10-13T22:57:00.000+01:00

It has been a long stay away from home. For the first time in the history of my life I have stayed away from parents, friends and everything that is dear to me. Well, don’t get carried away with the previous statement, I am not from the Neolithic age. Just used it to drive the point home.

They say, (I have no clue who says, but everyone says) you get used to it over a period of time. But in my case, the urge to be back where I belong gets stronger with time. I guess, its more like Rekha, she gets sexier with age. Man, she is some marvel I say!

Over a casual thought, I kept wondering how it would feel to be back at home. Thinking of home always gives me a sense of security. I get these stray thoughts when I am loaded with work; it gives me a super sonic push. I was lost for sometime thinking of those glorious reuniting moments. And I simply could not help myself from writing it, brainy would not allow it either, mainly for my own records.

# That long flight journey would make me restless as the hours tick by slowly. It would be a mixed feeling of sadness of leaving back SD which gave me more than I ever asked for; and happiness of going home.

#That first glimpse of my country, miles away yet, might give some happy thuds in my heart. After being an alien stranger for all these months, the feeling home coming would be great.

#That wait in the long queue to collect my luggage would kill me with that sweet impatience before I see my parents. Two people, whose love dragged me, back. Their smile would be worth more than any material success.

#How would it be to see my parents after such a long time, waiting for me with open arms? Hugging them would be the greatest joy for me in a long time, the pure bliss of being back with them. Would Ma give me those questioning looks about my hair and dress? Would Dad still look handsomely cute and start teasing me? Dad would start immediately about all the possible stories, making me simply glad that I was back.

My bro would not have come to meet me to Blore, he is busy with his college and exams. I will have to wait to meet him. It would be a total endearing joy to see the little kid all grown up, hovering tall above me. He definitely looks very handsome now. I would miss seeing him.

#How will it be to smell the sweet air of my country? That sky, that Blore chilly air, that traffic filled roads, will everything be the same as I had left them?

#Being back in my Mantu’s house and meeting all my couz would be so much joyful.
Mantu and Mavoo have been so much like my second set of parents for all these years.
Wondering what Mavoo would cook, it will surely have ‘jerber’ (that’s our code name for a particular dish)

Everyone would no doubt give me mega sized comments on my weight. (Jeez, I need to loose a few pounds before I leave, else my home coming won’t be so much fun). Will they still treat me like a kid? *sigh, I never grow-up for them*.

#Going back to Mlore, my home, my room, my bed, my things, would be so endearing. I would have got pretty senti and would demand to inspect everything. Hmm, to make sure everything is as cozy as I had left them. My Saffire darling would have been battered without my love and care, I hope he recognizes me. (er, its my two-wheeler)

#That delighted face of my bro would always remain in my memory, like the one I remember of him when I was leaving. Then, he was pretty senti, but the guy that he is, dint wanna show me that. He never came to say bye, not even to the car, he simply sat at home. I knew he was gonna miss me as I was gonna miss him.
Would he still let me hug-kiss-cuddle him?

#One more person who will meet me as soon as I set my foot in Mlore is my dear Dev. Oh yeah, he is gonna give me a bear hug, as he always does. He would probably drag me for icy and start ranting and raving about how much he missed me. And I would surely threaten to bash him if he dint stop.

#My dear Ovi and Andy, I would wait to meet them. They are busy but I am sure they will drop down when I come back, if not, I am surely gonna strangle them. I would never know from where to start, giving them details about everything and yeah, Andy would want to dance for some wacky kannada number.

#It would be a joy to meet my Chikku after all this time. There was a time when a month without seeing him would be highly unbearable for me. After all these months, pulling his nose would be quite a satisfaction for me. Would he still let me beat him? And wont I love to see the look on his face when I demand driving his new car?

#Meeting my Mamama (maternal granny) would be full of kisses. She always gives me lots of kisses and I simply adore her. Aww, I would call her much before that but meeting her in person would be simply great. Yeah, she will start on when I plan to marry topic.

#Going back to Tirthahalli would never be the same for me anymore. My Anama( paternal granny) passed away while I was here and never will I get a chance to see her ever again. Those memories will always be with me. I would miss her and I guess I would break down.

#How will it be to call all my friends, go to my school, my uni, meet my relatives? Will I be able to repeat the same stories without boredom? Will my tailor still have my dress measurements? (This got me worried; hope Vedas has a good collection)

#One important person I am already dying to meet has told me very sternly that I have to wait patiently till May. I would, with all my heart, to meet him. After all, I have waited long enough, kuch mahine aur sahi.

Well, just thinking about being home makes me delighted and honestly saying got a few stray tears too. I am sure that when I come back, I would have no regrets. It would be a blissful, delightful, wonderful and very much awaited home coming.

Flight tickets to India-$1200, Go-India Shopping-$2000, Singapore Transit-$1000, More Shopping-$500,
Homecoming- "Priceless" !!!

Dont be talking to a stranger

2006-10-12T23:50:00.000+01:00

Today, I got a mail from HIM. After two long years of literally forgetting each others existence I get a cheerful mail from HIM asking me if I still remembered him. Now, I agree I have a bad memory, but I smiled, a warm smile, yes, not because I remembered HIM, because it flooded back a few strange memories.
After two long years.

During my third semester of MBA I had submitted a paper on Emerging role of psychotherapy in human resource management. I had worked myself and my Prof out on this one, making him proof read 3 times. Luckily for me, I was selected with 12 other students from all over India to present our papers in the International Conference held in Janson’s Institute in Coimbatore. We had some 60+ top notch Profs from premier institutes around the country for a complete 5 day conference.

Being just 12 in number, we students stuck our heads together trying to make sense of each others insanity. This institute was some 20 miles away from Coimbatore in a godforsaken place called Karumathampatti and our only source of entertainment was pulling each others leg. And man, when you have 4 wacky gals and 8 crazy guyz, we did have some madcap fun. We bunked sessions, we sneaked out late, and we escaped noon presentations.

For the late evenings, we usually had some small stage shows where anyone could display their talents. This was mega fun as many serious Profs gave us some really wonderful surprises. Many sang, some presented a skitor two, few danced, one played guitar, and many such chota-mota shows. The students usually took a back seat and hooted and whistled.

It was our first day at the confy and none of us knew each other. We did our “hi”, “bye”, “smile”, “cough” with grace, style and class. After all, we were the selected lot, hand picked and privileged to present our ‘I-don’t-know-what-the-heck-I-have-written’ kind of papers. In our initial invitation we were informed that each participating student had to give a culture show. I was ready with my tons of senti-ronewaali shaayris. And I had volunteered to be the compeer for all the evening shows.

Well, it was the first day we were ready of this talent ‘show’, giving nervous smiles at each other. For most of us, the last stage show was in school when we dressed in stupid dress for some equally dumb action songs for the annual day. And now, we were to perform, complete with audience. Next day we were expected to present our papers with sophistication and yeah, we were given marks on that for a winning trophy for our respective institutes. We were stressed enough at the first place, and we would have done fine without this talent charade.

Anyway, peanut size mortals have no say in such watermelon sized things. There was HIM, this guy from Delhi Uni, a tall, fair, handsome guy with real soft voice. Err, I must say he was outrageously cute.
*sorry, drool over Johnny boy for a sec*

And this guy was to dance for the hyper beats of “yanakoru girlfriend veenu” from the Tamil movie Boyz. Now, this guy does not know Tamil, nor do the rest of the crowd. He says he dint dance for ages since school and he is all nervous. I say, chill yaar, simply give yourself some volatile moves, no one understands it anyway.

So, we start the music, our boy starts to dance. Does it pretty well too. I am next on the line with my shaayri scripts, compeering notes and program list. All of sudden, he stops, misses a few steps, looks worried, walks coolly towards me, pulls me on the stage and continues dancing.

It was pretty filmy too, with my papers strewn on the floor, him and me danced to the tune of A R Rehman happily. None of us knew the steps, we dint match our steps either, I dint know the tunes of the song to top it, and I kept giggling. We kept the music & dance going till the end and few more from the crowd joined us. The crowd was laughing and cheering too. That was some talent show.

Later he said that he had forgotten the steps as he did not understand the lyrics. I was nearest to the stage and he hoped I would be sportive enough to join him. And yes, I did, and I enjoyed it every bit. And he dint wanna look like a fool all alone. Er, I excused him for that one. After the dance, I collected all my papers in a mess and carried out my senti-roonewaali shayris with some “wah wah”s.

But this incident was the best ice-breaker for us. We had total fun for the next 5 days, the twelve of us breaking into dance whenever we could. It was followed by an amazing weekend in Ooty with some street dancing too.

After the conference, each one had exchanged our email ids and decided to keep in touch with mails which we never did. After two years, I hardly remember their names forget the ids. But that dance will always be unforgettable.

His mailed said that he was cleaning his desk last night and he got the BOYZ cassette. He remembered me, hunted for the id and mailed me. That was truly sweet of him. It made my day. I was humming that tune all day long. Pity, I could not dance in the office.

Some strange incidents, some strange days, some strange people, some strange memories, make us happy in some strange ways.

And they make us smile.

(Hey AS, I have posted this in my bloggy as promised, now send me my $$$)

Somnacallism-'baatofying in the raat'

2006-10-11T21:34:00.000+01:00

For those who are familiar with terms like Somnambulism and Soliloquy, please hold your mouse gently, move the cursor to the extreme top right and click on the red color cross button.

Thank You!!!

Ok, you guys who are still hanging here, lemme explain in muggle terms. It is nothing but sleep-walking and sleep-talking. It’s some state of mind where a muggle decides that he has had a heavy dinner and wants to take a quick walk in the unearthly hours of night or decides that he needs to address some topic of worldly importance at unworldly hours.

I learnt such very interesting things in my Psychotherapy days, wondering how people could get much more insane than me. Uh, I have to confess that I get pretty disoriented when I am awake, so the question of getting multi-level disoriented when I am asleep is as stupid as asking Mallika Sherawat to remove her clothes.

Yes, I get much disoriented, especially when I am engrossed in something. And if I am woken from deep slumber, I could scare the devils worth in you with my highly instable behaviors and talks. You might think I am high on a keg of beer. I don’t like beer anyway, I prefer Zinfandel.

But, junta who gave a gasp, not to worry, this does not happen often. I am hit with such bouts only when I am stressed or disturbed. Nope, I don’t walk around in my sleep, I just make random calls to people I know. Pretty cool uh?

Past few days have been very heavy on my tender shoulders and too much for my peanut butter brainy. He has been scribed for his worth. This leaves me drenched of all sensible thoughts, not that I have much of it anyway. Result: I have been sleep-calling.

Somnacallism= Somna-sleep; callism-calling disorder

I hope some board for mental health recognizes my humble contribution towards the study of sleep science and associated disorders and bestows a fancy title over me. Even a few million dollars will be accepted with grace.

I happened to have called my mom and a friend in last 2 days at unearthly hours (SD time) and have spoken to them in slumbers. I had no clue about these calls but did check my call accounts to actually trace that I did call.

The conversation went something like this (as told to me by them):

Call One
Time: app 4pm (Mlore) = 3.30am (SD)

Mom: hello
Me: hello ma, miss home a lot, I am coming back soon.
Mom:uh? Are you all right?
Me: I am sleeping
*hang*

Call Two
Time: app 5.30am (mlore) = 5am (SD)

Mom: hello
Me: what is for breakfast? I am sleeping, will call you later.
Mom: *^&^% ???
*hang*

Call Three
Time: app 6pm (blore) = 5.30 am (SD)

Friend: hello?
Me: I just remembered you, so called. Sleeping. Bye
Friend: err? %$*&^(&
*hang*

Some findings:

1. I guess I could be a good subject matter for my PhD studies. My thesis might be real interesting with random facts about myself.
2. I called my mom on Reliance account, which I always use to call home. I called her on her cell, with which I can conclude that I did have a sense of time. (Else, I usually call her on landline)
3. I called my friend on USP account which I use to call friends. This shows that I dialed all the pin codes perfectly even in my sleep.
4. My friend has to be grateful to me that remember him even in my sleep.
5. My mom better be proud that I like her cooking even in my sleep and dream about breakfast.
6. I am an eating glutton that I dream of food all the time.
7. I need to keep my mobile phone miles away from my reach to avoid such calls.
8. I should stop stressing myself at work and taking too many calls.
9. I miss home like hell.
10. I am perfectly insane.

Next time you get a call from me, please stop to check if I am baatofying in the raat.
SCARED?
*evil laughter*

(ok, a few bits were glamourified to get 'the' effect. I am not that bad, as yet)

(Un)conditioned Relations for me

2006-10-09T22:03:00.000+01:00

I need to talk, yes, I really need to talk. It’s about relationships. It’s been in my mind for a real long time and has been gnawing at my poor brainy. So, I am just getting it out of my system. I suggest you not reading it for self sanity factor.

I usually avoid talking on these lines, and I rather discuss the GDP growth of Somalia, literary ratio of Meghalaya or even Mallika Sherawat’s sari collection. It’s just that when I talk about relations, I get raw and often a stray sigh escapes from deep within my hearts.

To tell about it, I have my masters in Human Relations and further a specialization in a certain critical area of human psychotherapy. I grew up learning the intricacies of relations, types, ways, methods, reasons and other micro molecule sized facts of building relations. I got pretty high scores in my exams too, which proves that I did have definite solid theory knowledge.

But, after living all these relations for years, trying to live up to expectations, trying to bond over distances, trying to save a few of them, trying to avoid ego conflicts, trying to compromise on few, I have come-up with my own relationship theory.

Eureka!!!

This makes my understanding of the human relations much simpler to understand and even better to practice. Forgetting all the mega sized flow chats on HR, I have only 2 types of relations.

1. Conditioned relations

These relations are basically forced on to us, by our self, by others or by circumstances. If given a chance, we would gladly wave a pleasant “goodbye” to such relations and take a walk. But most of the time, in the given circumstances and given obligations and pressures we give into such relations and try to get the best out of it.

Most of it might be a compromise, with constant urge to get out of it. We might be happy for sometime over a few things, but there is a hidden factor of disappointment or some untold dissatisfaction.

Think of a marriage one was forced into, think of a neighbor you are forced to live next to, think of a irritating relative you have to put-up with, think of that boss who makes your life a living hell, think of a mother-in-law who decides your every move.

Well, thinking about such relations without whom life would have been much pleasant, I can say that I try staying away from such relations. But, at times obligations and circumstances get better of me and I have to bear them. I am glad to have developed a defense mechanism of projecting my dis-pleasure about something or someone in a much sensible way. Like, hey, my bloggy.

Then, there is a constant fear of breaking such relations which might affect very badly. There is a constant pressure to avoid any complexities in the relations and most of the times, everything goes unspoken which leads to more tension and strain.

Such relations, for me are a considerable waste of time, energy and human emotions. Every relation has an emotional characteristic to it and such relations strips a person of his ability to be sensitive to a relation. He might even loose trust in relations and build a wall around him. A sensitive person might turn stone cold and devoid himself with other possibly fruitful relations.

2. Unconditioned relations

These are very pleasant relations where we are generally genuine self. These relations exist because we want them to exist. No pressures, no compromise, no suffering, but plain simple bonding. These relations are much simpler to understand and live and follow. Some of them don’t even have any hidden advantages or demands.

These are beautiful relations in terms of understanding and sharing. We often take such relations for granted and forget to acknowledge them. Often, we overlook these simple pleasures and search out for much complex meanings. We are ungrateful and we are ignorant.

If looked closely into our closest friends, our relations with them are mostly unconditioned. Most unlikely people bonded to have a long-lasting friendship. Few people whom we met for the first time as completely strangers, turned out to be buddies for lifetime. Some people whom we hardly know, we are most comfortable in their company.

We talk, we fight, we meet often, we are separated by distances, we never keep in touch, we stay next door, nothing material matters for unconditioned relations. All that matters is the bonding of being there because we want it. These are beautiful relations and instill an emotional variant in the individual. This gets stronger with time and enables a person to trust others.

I am glad that I have more of unconditioned relations which build my trust in human relations. These bonds are very simple, yet very mysterious.

I am not sure if this makes any sense, but for me, mera dil ka bhoj halka hua. When I have this gut feeling of wanting to write something, I simply have to type with feverish speed until the peanut brainy smiles showing all his bateesi, Colgate smile!

(BTW, those three fellas of mine were conditioned relations for me, but what the heck, I love them anyway.)

Life on break

2006-10-04T22:57:00.000+01:00

There was this sweet little girl, pretty insane, definitely weird and highly demented. She always had two darling friends who stood by her all her life. They had a very interesting time together. All their life the three were inseparable. She loved them. They loved her.

Then one fine day, she was told that she will be going to a far away land. She was going alone. It was her first time, her very first step towards a real long life. She was scared, she was insecure, she was thrilled, she was proud, she was excited, and she was in tears.

Then she heard about this new fellow who promised her that he could be her good friend in that alien land. Her two friends and her all hugged him warmly. Very soon all the four became very good friends. They shared their joys, sorrows and their life. This new life was a piece of cake for them and the four sailed happily.

She felt very comforted with them, she felt secured and she belonged with them. Nothing, she thought, could ever be dearest to her than her 3 darling friends. They were her babies, her hopes, her desires, her reflections, and a part of herself.

Then, as time went by and she grew with time. She made new friends, she saw a different world, and she lived a different life. She became very busy with her work and she was drenched out of her energy. She missed her darlings, she wanted to be with them, and she wanted to talk to them, as much as they wanted her in their life.

But her three dear friends are still waiting for her, because she has promised them that she will be back. I will be back, to my darling friends, brainy, tanhayee and bloggy.

My mood is my desktop

2006-09-28T01:08:00.000+01:00

Ever since I got a new pc in the office, I have taken up a couple of new interesting habits. Like, I walk in to the cubicle and paav laagu my pc, nariyal phodo on my desk and aarti utaaru the chair. Then pour some water on the keyboard, put a tikha on the screen, and offer some sweets to the CPU.

Ok, that was a joke and you were supposed to throw a fit of laughter at my poor sense of humor. Since you dint, I shall get into some details of my new 'above mentioned' habits. Previously, I had a old pc which was so old that even the mainframe comps got sharmofied looking at it. It was huge like a 21’’ tv and had greyed with time. The keyboard made weird munching sounds and snaily slow. I respected it a lot as it was elder to me in many ways.

Then one fine day, the sun was shinning bright, the wind was blowing softly, the birds chirping happily, and it was spring time. (You remember that scene from Jism where our Bips babe emerges dripping wet from the waves? Now, I dint know what she was doing there at such early hours, dressed to party?)-

And, I got a new sexy black pc. Now, a seducing black, sleek, and updated Dell babe flutters her eye lashes at me. But she cannot compete with my handsome lappy darling *kissing my lappy fella*

Anyway, with this new pc I decided to cheer myself everyday with something very colorful. All this time, I had a picture of my bro and me in a beary hug as my desktop. It always made me miss home, that too early in the morning when I walked into office. The colorful desktop theme hit my brainy fella and now, my compy talks to me about "me". Eh?

Confusing? Nah, It’s very simple.

1. walk to you cubicle
2. Turn your compy on
3. Open Google images
4. Google for the mood you are in
5. Decide on the picture that best suits your mood
6. Save it as you wallpaper
7. (optional) Change it every time your mood changes

I must confess that it has made my days more interesting in many ways. When I think about the current mood, I try to cheer myself up to get the most bright and colorful wallpaper. I always go for very vibrant colors and themes. It is very interesting to Google for these images too and sometimes I cannot decide the best picture to select.

When my mood changes, I change the pic and it does pep me up to a greqat extent. I try to be cheerful all the time to keep nice wallpaper and that is something I look forward to do. And everytime the screen gets locked I have a very vibrant pic greeting me back. I, kinda feel motivated with this new habit coz it helps me to breeze through my day.

For today I had a very bright coconut tree on my screen. When I was coming to office, it was cloudy and I remembered my rainy days in Mlore. I loved to see the rain drop from the coconut tree leaves. And this tree signifies a lot of things, it is called ‘kalpavriksha’ and it was also my school emblem. It was nice to see this on my screen the whole day.

Yesterday I had bright gerberas on my screen. Pink, yellow, red, simply because I was in a very chirpy mood. I have also had bright roses, blue sea, rainbows, pencils, bikes, ice creams, and other couples of things as my wallpapers. Everything which suited my mood perfectly then, at that time.

Now, I have something fun awaiting me every morning when I walk into the office. Something colourful, something fun, something I look forward to.

So, what will it be next?

Jo biwi se kare pyaar, woh 'cooker' se kaise kare inkar ?

2006-09-27T01:25:00.000+01:00

After the prolonged absence from my world of innately insane random thoughts, I am back! (hands on the hip)
*thud*

I am back! (Flapping my arms in Shaktimaan style)
*thud thud*

I AM BACK !!! (tenten teeen..music)
*thud thud thud*

Ok, it’s not a thing to celebrate, knowing, that I will be religiously involved in posting highly not-so-sensible posts, but common, cheering a demented soul brings out the best in her.
Na, says not me, but a certain ancient ‘skanda puraan’.
(I have no clue if we have such puran, but I heard about it in a comedy drama)

Past few weeks have been quite occupying in terms of my social life and office work. With all the extracting extra efforts my dear brainy was left drained of all his otherwise enthu self. Tanhayee was not seen for a few days and bloggy was hibernating. In short, I was off market with not much access to my lappy. *kisses her lappy*

Then I thought, if Lolo babe can give a grand re-entry, so can I. *hmpf* Hence I tried on a entry with flapping wings, colourful attire, bangining music in the Shaktimaan style and a smirky look on my face. Looks like it is not all that grand, next time I will try on the James Bond estyle.

About the dinner date I had with a friend, I must say it was wonderful. She cooks awesome and I greedily hogged the dishes clean. I literally looked like I had recently immigrated from the starve zone of Somalia. I doubt if she had to wash any of my bowls or plates. I can proudly brim that I can qualify to be the Jim Licker of the year!

The li’l doll (her daughter)kept me occupied with her li’l baby games and I enjoyed making ducky voices. Er, for those unaware of my talented living, I can talk like the tweety bird in the Sylvester cartoons, making “I thot I thaw a putty kat, yeet, I deed I deed” voices. I can actually talk like that for hours and once a new lecturer in my college had a fit when I went quacking around on her first day.

Anyway, back to the baby, shes small (as all babies are), she cute(as all babies are) and very very observing (not all babies are). I did like this coz she kept staring at me for reasons known only to her. Her actions complete with a small frown and raised eyebrow. My conclusion, er, she found me very interesting ?

The best part of meeting them is that I finally found someone who rides a bike on SD freeways. I have been crazily waiting for a chance to get some air in my hair and hopfully my wish will be grnated sometime soon. To add, I was surprised to see a desi family have a bike and a convertible and a couple of mountain bikes. Er, desis here are usually synonym with Honda and Toyota. No offense meant.

And I got a late night drive back on the convertible. The frog in me was so thrilled that he still gives a croak when he thinks of the bikes. On a thoughtful note, I hope the guy I marry will have a passion for bikes; else he will have a mega shock of his life when he sees me drool over those sexy 2 wheelers. Ok, I drool over the Johnny guy too.

Observing my activities of the past few days, I can say that I am emerging into a new ‘cook’ on the block. Yes, I have been cooking, in large scale. My culinary skills are getting better with my stay in US and some distinct fusionary dishes steam in my cauldron.

This reminded me of my first cooking experience as a kid. I learnt it in a primitive way. Our house backyard had different varieties of flowers, fruits, leaves and ants. I would put 3 stones together, assembles few dry twigs, and light a minuscule fire. Then pour some water into a tiny vessel (which was to be used for more domestic games) and add all the buds I could gather. My special dish was fried black ants which I managed to make painstakingly after running behind the ants and getting a few bites. My blissful cooking habits ceased when Ma threatened to replace me in the vessel instead of the ants. Then, I never realised that the huge me would never fit into the tiny vessel. I was such an innocent darling, you see.

Anyway, I did some decent cooking during my days as a Guide. Yeah, the one where you wear blue uniform, tie a scarf around your neck, tie neat pig tails, and salute with 3 fingers. We did dry cooking, wet cooking, camp cooking, and other stuff to earn ourselves a few proficiency badges. I even made some pickle and jam, which was not much edible.

In school, we had these cooking competitions for which I participated with much enthu. I was in a team with 5 other friends who considered themselves budding Sanjay Kapoor. Those were the days of Khana Khazan in Zee tv. Anyway, our Ma’s would pack us all the needed stuff in right measures and we would gladly add everything in pans and try making the best of our limited talents. I still pity the judges who had to bear all our trials.

My best exploiting memory is the way we made the ‘kashi halwa’. The whole pan fell off from the stove and landed on the floor with the raw mixture scattered on the floor. We gathered the whole thing back, every bit, every grain, every dryfruit and made the halwa. Trust me; none of us took a bite even to taste it. But the judges happily munched on the sweet and gave us some real good points. That day I took an oath, never to be the judge in any cooking competition.

My next mega disaster was a Custard that I made. Everything went fine till I added maida and heated it on high flames. The whole thing transformed into a gluey mess. It looked like custard, but tasted more like a homemade starch. My darling dad had some to keep my heart and so did my bro, and for the next two days they were not so fine.

After many such disastrous attempts, I took a few sensible cooking classes from Ma. It took immense patience at her end to tame the implusive me from burning the house down but yes, I did learn. From her, from the cookery shows, from the books and my own trial error methods. Now, I cook decent and report no harmful events.

I refined my cooking skills to make decent dishes which my bro liked. I loved to feed him with his favourites and it was a pleasure to see him relish. When I look at my signature recipies I realise that most of them are the ones which he likes. I guess, he was partly responsible for my cooking enthu.

Coming to the US was the last straw in my cooker life ( I want to call myself cooker, any problems?). Being a veggie, my only option was to chew the cud. I dint wanna spend a year of my life on garden burgers and iceberg salads. It was hard to get the desi grocery initially but with a few tips and tricks, I am doing fine now. I can make fried rice to mushroom kurma, hot southie coffee to thick mango lassi, typical amchi curry to stuffed aaloo paratha.

While at it, I must confess that one of my ambitions (yes, I had several and due to the non-coperating nature of my parents, I have not been able to realise any of them), was to have a blue colour 'gaadi' by the roadside and make egg omelettes. Maybe, upon my return I can think of diverse opportunities.

And I am yet to reply to all the comments in the previous posts which I shall do sometime soon. I also need to visit all the fella bloggies who have been updated. And I am planning to host a dinner party for my Mr.Blogs friends.

Please drop-in a note if your Mr.Blog/Ms.Blog will be present. Guests are very welcome, specially any chick bloggy babes.

On duty- Tooty Frooty

2006-09-22T00:47:00.000+01:00

If any of the blogizen (city:citizen::blog:blogizen)thinks that I am high on my bipolar maniac disorder and have been scaring the insane people out of their innocent minds, Nah! Thats not the reason for my long absconding abscence.

I am yet to update the comments section of the previous posts, update bloggy with my highly insensible thoughts and yes, the complete update on my blind date. But, everything has to wait for a few days. These days my peanut butter brains is more sensible and projects less stupid flashes in his 70mm. (please note, I said less stupid-that means he still projects a few demented thoughts)

The reason: I am incharge of a li'l angel who still rests snuggly in his(universal ref) mom's care. And his mom happens to be this maasi's friend and maasi is incharge of the li'l angel till his daddy comes back. So, from a few days, I am tented in my friends home keeping myself well-behaved, er, atleast i try to.

I have been feeling his li'l feet do the kickoing, the li'l him tumbling happily and the li'l him trying to do some boxing. Lappy is forgotten, loud songs are curbed, dishum-dishum movies banned, and me sleeping early. Shocked? er, but when I think of tiny bundles of adoring babies, the devil in me sprouts white wings and a goden halo surrounds my head.

Oh, I need to mention the would-be mommy in question somewhere as she has already complained that I dont give her much importance. So, heres for the mommy too,(keeping the dinner in mind) who looks charming with that motherly glow. I have never seen her so radiant and glowing.

So, it will take a few more days for the rough-tough Hero to get back to her adda and get back to her tapori habits. Right now, she is busy doing baby shopping, drooling over the colourful toys, adoring the cute dresses and doing baby talks.

"gaa-gaa-goo-ulloo-chooo-oou-rroo"

Er, if you think why the heck does "tooty frooty" fit into the whole post, nope it does not. It just rhymed ???

Let us leave it with a stop

2006-09-20T00:35:00.000+01:00

I could not believe my eyes when I saw the date when the last post was updated. It’s been almost a week and I have not taken pains to scratch a few lines. Nope, this is very very unlike me. This is a very grave matter in hand.

For the normal insane me (er, I know it’s an oxymoron, but I wriggle my nose at that) a couple of posts every week makes sense. To tell honestly, my 70 mm flat plasma screen runs full time disoriented thoughts on a mega scale and every time I get a urge to pull the brakes and key in words at a supersonic intensity to get a highly volatile post.

But, owing to the very disturbing facts and highly unavoidable circumstances I project these urges on some fruitful activities like making faces at the monitor, give random calls to clients, make colorful drawings for my cubicle and take print-out of the Johnny guy. *drool*

Today, I was shocked beyond words. Yes, one week is a real long time even to my lazy bones. So, keying some rumblings to glory. One more reason, now a super sexy black comp screen fluttering her eyelashes at me. Yes, I got a new comp at work, complete with optical mouse, touch keypad, black IP phone and equally powerful CPU. The thrilling part is that the whole sexy dame comes complete with yahoo messenger access.

Hehehehe, now that I have my Mona darling, where is the billi?

Just for reference:my lappy is a “HE”-the male, the hunk, the macho; my comp in office is a “SHE” –the dame, the chick, the seductress.
Why??? I don’t know, and I don’t care.

Our office had a picnic by the Mission Bay beach last Friday with loads of games and tons of food. I had to chomp the limited veggie stuff and feel happy with the games. *hmpf* But, hero did have a large scoop of rich choco icy and good share of candies.

Anyway, there was this game where they had a tiny bubble gum on a plate, covered it with abnormal quantity of whipped cream and tied our hands back. We were expected to find the gum with our nose dipped in cream, chew it and make a bubble out of it. The hero did a great job displaying her monkey traits and blew a decent bubble and won a $25 gift card to Macy’s.

*Hero bows with a grin to the whistling taporis*
(er, my nose smelt very sweet later on, owing to the amount of cream iced inside my nose)

With this new comp, I have been yahooing with all the fellow taporis for a good amount of time. Also, it lets me keep a track of my bro’s late night activity. Seems like he is doing too much of “group studies” off late. The members of the group studies remain a complete mystery question. I guess its time for Ma to give him a gyan session.

2 days back, I was browsing around to find an informative site on Konkani culture and I came across this site . I must say that it is very interesting as I have been grilled to it for sometime now. I have been reading a lot about amchi culture and traditions. Now, hunting fanatically for a ‘chaangu amchi challo’ (er, good Konkani boy)

Talking about guys, I recently had some hilarious experience while on a matrimonial hunt for a friend. He gave us some details about himself and ‘desired’ qualities he wishes in the girl. Loaded with that, we began our hunt and hit all the ‘shaadi waala’ sites. The response is tremendous and also, I was surprised to say that I found many of my friends there. Looks like it could soon be a socializing engine like yahoo groups and orkut. Well, instead of scraping, you would be sending horoscopes, sounds interesting.

Interestingly, I am hooked to this movie called ‘Roman Holiday’, a fairytale romance classic from the 50’s staring Gregory Peck and Audrey Hepburn. Else how would you explain me watching it for the 13 odd times within 2 months?

I liked the innocent princess Ann, who takes a day for herself in the ancient ruins of Rome and meets this charming press reporter Joe and both fall in love. The last 15 mins of the movie is truly touching and one sentence always catches me raw,
“I have every faith in it as I have faith in relations between people."

Hepburn looks stunning with her Belgium looks and British accent, fitting perfectly into the role of the rebelling princess. Peck looks just too charming with his smile and deep voice. *more drool*

The was directed by William Wyler who also directed my other favorite movie Ben Hur, staring the charismatic Charlton Heston. *super drool*

For a person who likes to stick to her ultra senseless Govinda movies with scary songs and jerky moves, watching these firangi movies is a big deal. Anyway, I plan to watch a kannada movie today. They beat Govinda anyway with their moronic heros.

After writing this post, I am wondering what title do I bestow on it. And if you have read it till this line, till this last word, till this very comma, you might notice that it does not make much of sense and none of the topics are related. Well, none of my posts do for that matter. So, let us leave it with a stop.

Red rose on a blind date

2006-09-13T00:28:00.000+01:00

After the volatile state of insanity displayed by me yesterday, I am extremely delighted to say that I am in a relatively stable state of sobered bliss. Reading my post of yesterday, the three machas (er, you know them-Bloggy, Brainy, and Tanhayee) made a lot of fuss about me and the need of the hour to make efforts to act balanced.

I said, I was a game, why not try? So from today, I shall act balanced. I said “act” which hints all the possibility of me not acting too, equal hypothetical chances.

Today, I am excited. I am going on a blind date. Nah, I am not gonna blindfold myself and poke the people on the road with my walking stick but I will be meeting someone.
Someone, to whom I have been talking to for almost a month now, whom I was supposed to meet for sometime now, whom I was supposed to join for dinner for many days, to whom I have been updating a lot about myself, about whom I have been telling my mom too.

Hey, it has nothing to do with romantic candle lights dinner or a walk along the beach on a full moon night. It’s nothing to do with displaying my ever dying love for food, or my random profile markings in shaadi website. Absolute nothings.

It’s a SHE, my mom’s friend’s- friend’s daughter (note the close knitted relation) who stays here with her husband and her little kiddo baby. She has been eager to meet me even since she got the news that I was running around untamed along the freeways of SD and she as been so generously inviting me over. I was pretty much excited with the fact that I had one more Mlore fanatic person around. On my first instinct I wanted to land my arse at her place at the first given chance. But, I was held up with my usual hula hopping tricks that I never actually made it to her place.

Today, I finally made up my mind, called her up, and finalized on meeting her. And, she has invited me for dinner, amchi food and all. Now, any hot tongued amchi staying miles away from home will drool shamelessly over the thought of well-cooked home food. So, here I am, from the early twilight of morning, seeing stars, chirping birds, planets on their axis and all excited to meet her.

Er, she has asked me to stand at the bus stop with a red rose. Does it sound too weird?

High on desi raat

2006-09-12T01:34:00.000+01:00

Bohut din hogaye aur Hero ne kuch likhaich nahi. Hero thoda din underground tha. Apun ke bhai ka happy birthaday ka postich lasht tha. Boletho full senti tha na, tho herone kuch likhaich nahi, khopdi mein 70mm challaich nahi.

Public thoda natak kiya aur Hero ko pucha ki who teen sadele mister log (Tanhayee, Peanut butter brain and Bloggy) kahan margaye. Who teen maamu log apun ke chaddi yaar hain, aur jab woh pulti marte hain, apunka upper chamber ek dhum khaali hota hai. Fultosh blank.

Apun ko thoda tension hua. Waise apun usually tension letaich nahi, sirf detha hai. Who bhi apunke boss ko. Who kya hai ki apun ke boss ko apun ke upper bohut pyaar aaya hai aaj kal, boleto bahut kaam deta hai. Tho apun bhi uska waat lagatha hai.

Ab yeh teen maamu log gahas chabaane gaya hai, nahi,,, sachhi, John bhai ki kassam. Isliye apunke paas likhne ko no matter hai. Tho apun aaj, apna dil khol ke bindas maamugiri karega, aur no topic likhega. Tere ko nahi panda hai to mat pad, office mein sooja, nahi to boss ke naak ke baal gin, nahi to computer ko ek puppy de, par mujhe gaali nahi deneka.

If you are wondering what in the name of the divine devil is wrong with me, nah munna nah, no worry karneka, apun ko maamugiri ka jhatka laga hai. Specially after watching the movie of Munna Bhai, I have bells ringing in my head with all maamu waali talks.

Coming to US made me mend many of my not-so-feminine antics. I shifted from khadi to tees, from pani puris to burgers and from tapori hindi to accent waali English. Aila! Now, after watching this movie yesterday, I have this new surge of taking out a bandana, ripping a few buttons off my shirt, folding my sleeves, untying my shoe laces, walking with nose in the air. Typical Sanju baba mafik, but er, I cant, I Cant, I CANT. And this makes the frustrated hero in me to atleast post a rapchik wajjandhar bematlab waali post. Not to forget the tapori mails those have been flying between the inboxes of my friends.

There was a desi daaru party on Friday night for celebrating “happy birthaday” of 3 friends at Bani’s. Now, when I say “Bani’s” its not some fancy pub or hangout in SD downtown with skimpy babes hanging on poles or some macho hunk sporting his six pack torso; it’s the big time adda for the young desi people and Baniji is our host. She is this very sweet, bubbly girl with loads of energy and enthu to host such regular parties.

Well, on friday night it was full of desi people (abe dhakkan, desi party mein ‘desi’ log nahi honge to aur kaun hoga? gali ka raamlal?) and the pura mahol was desi, this time with a load bunch of new entries. And there were people who were friends of friends and thei friends. Samajhme aaya, itne log the.

There was a mega keg of beer which was surrounded by guys, big time. There was loads of desi food, desi music, desi gaalis and desi hugs. For a few hours, it was back to some normal ‘aabhi-hum-young-hain’ kinda parties back home. There was a full-time intro session to know who was who, who was whose friend, who knew whom and who did what kind of stuff.

The mega attraction was the golgappa, nope, not the ‘pani puri’, it was “daaru puri”. In a big bowl was a purplish mixture of all the drinks hands could lay upon, soft drinks, fruit juices, punch and liquor. Now, the challenge here was, you should drown the whole not-so-appealing thing down your throats. A mandatory welcome snack I guess. The person in charge of this whole idea personally made you gulp it and one person gladly clicked photos of you choking on that unearthly thing.

Anyway, this puri thing sucked big time with the foul taste. Eks.

It was fun to meet new people and do “ki ki”. Nope I am not drunk, but kiki happens to be some kind of weird laughs these guys do. I was equally surprised and unsure for the first time but I guess kiki is an inseparable event at ‘Bani’s’.

You walk in- do the kiki
You do the intro- do the kiki
You smile at someone- do the kiki
You dance to some Govinda number- do the kiki
You are eating- do the kiki
You crack a joke- do the kiki
You are drunk- do the kiki
You see yourself in the mirror- do the kiki

Bohut ‘kiki’fying experience I say!

Sunday ko apunne ‘lage raho munna bhai’ dekha. The theater was brimming full with Indian crowd, all hyper to watch the movie. This desi lot which acts ultra sophisticated otherwise, throws all the courtesies and mannerisms in midair in such instances and there was a hell lot of a pushing and pulling for the seats. At this point I must mention that in US, we don’t have allotted seats as in India. We just walk in and plop down on the seat that catches our fancy. So, there were desis throttling each other to get the peeche waala accha seat.
Such typical desi habits, uh.

After some point, there was some disturbance on the screen and the whole crowd honked, whistled, screamed, hooted and shouted. I guess, even in India we don’t act so untamed and wild. It was fun howling after all these months. Er, for those in eternal bliss of ignorance, Hero likes to whistle to glory upon the entry of her choicest stars. And when I say ‘whistle’ its with an intensity that half a dozen around turn their heads to give her a ‘oh-ladki-hai?’ look but she does not care. Hm, too much talk on desigiri?

The dinner was also very Indian at ‘Tandoor’, a very nice eatery joint which makes the best naans in SD. I also love their mango lassi and masala onion salad.

On a happy note, I tried making mixed veggie soup today which turned out to be okish. Now, I can say my husband is a lucky man, boleto apun uskeliye soup banasaktha hai na aur woh apunkeliye dinner banasaktha hai.

With all the crap tapkufying from this post, I am not sure if anyone reading this is still winking with sanity. Anyway, for all those sleeping,

Subha hogayi maamu!!!

Happy B'day bro

2006-09-07T00:04:00.000+01:00

17 years ago my Ma placed a li’l tightly wrapped bundle in my li’l arms and said he was all mine, he was my li’l brother. Today, this li’l darling of mine celebrates his 17th b’day.
And he is not so-li’l anymore, he hovers tall above me.

It’s the first time in 17 years that I am away from all the celebrations, hence this post, wishing my darling- MANY MANY HAPPY RETURNS OF THE DAY!!!
Sept 7, 1989- I was excited coz everyone at home was excited about this mega arrival of this much spoken new baby. Oh, I did wait for him, yes! I had waited for him all those years, pinning my heart for a little thing at home. Every friend of mine had a bro or sis to boss over and play with. I just had my cat –munali which did not take much to my bossing. I wanted a bro, not sis, only a bro.

I was excited about going to the hospital to inspect the new fella and I dressed myself so well with all the make-up that my mom and dad had a fit when they saw me. I looked like a clown. And then, my Ma gave me this thing which remotely resembled the baby monkey in Kadri park with his pink face and I wondered if this handful thing was really my brother. *Me a princess and my bro a frog?

He then opened his little eyes and man; I fell in love with this fella.

I adored my bro, he was the cutest thing for me. Everything about him was li’l, lips, eyes, nose, fingers, legs, and a real cute tummy. He had the softest curls and the chubbiest smile. I loved his soft buttocks the most and his gurgling voice. I would spend hours playing with him, doing stupid faces to see him smile, make sounds, I loved everything about him.

I never needed dolls as I would dress him up in frilly frocks and bows. He never objected for a few years till he realized what I was up to. He had a cycle on which I sat and he pushed me around. Once I dressed him so badly that my Ma took a week to get rid of all the kajal and lipstick. I loved to carry him around, give him piggy rides and just cuddle him.

It was a nice growing with my bro, especially with the huge age difference. I got to see myself in him time and over again. We went to the same school, same teachers taught us, we went to the same tuitions, we share the same interests, and we have trekked together. And every time it was great to hear people tell me how smart my bro is.

Yes, he is smart and bright and now, very good looking. Heard he is quite a hit with the girls and I am sure he will grow to be quite a hunk. The amount of girls in his friends list and the calls he gets, gets me a bit concerned. Uh, gets even my Ma concerned. I guess, I need to keep a track on his activities.

Its 8 months and all have seen of him is in photos and webcam. I miss seeing him grow, growing tall and taking strides towards life. I miss cuddling him around and him beating me and chasing me and he hates me kissing him. And I love to do just that.

Every morning when I walk into my office and switch my comp, a loving photograph of my bro and me in a hug greets me. I never knew I would ever miss someone ever so much. I never knew that –that li’l thing- could ever change my life so much.

Over the years, we have bonded as friends. Maybe the age difference did have its toll, but we always shared many things together. He always made me laugh when I was in my low, always had a hug for me, scared the shit out of me, laughed with me, teased me and made me spend my money. (It’s very hard to make me spend MY money-I trust my dads ATM)

Now, when I hear people tell me about him, I feel proud as a big sis, I know I did a good job (time for some back patting) in guiding him. I know that he will grow to be one wonderful person and I know we will be there for each other all our lives.

Hey annubabes,
I donno if you ever read this or not, but I just want you to know that you are the best gift I ever got and I love you a lot. I wish you a wonderful b’day filled with loads of success and a year filled with joys and many reasons to celebrate.
*Your gift will be upon my return*

Note: I tried to call my bro at 12am to wish him and his cell was engaged for almost an hour before I could finally get through him. Hm, looks like he is growing real fast!

I have no clue if this post makes sense, I am all senti today coz I missed babas b’day

To my teachers with love

2006-09-06T00:13:00.000+01:00

“Guru brahma guru vishnu guru devo maheshwaraha
Guru sakshaat parabrahma tasmahi shri guruven namaha”

As a student in Canara, we always started our day with this prayer along with other prayers. We were taught that teacher was a reflection of god who imparted his knowledge to us. He shaped our future and guided us to have a better life. He held our hand and moved us from darkness to light. Much was taught in our moral science classes too.

I remember each teacher of mine from my kindergarten to university, maybe the face is not that clear but do still remember their names and the subjects they taught. I was not very fond of couple of them, gave many a hard time, was not-so-ideal-student, but I was absolutely crazy about other few. Many of my teachers are still in touch and I make it a point to wish them every year.

This year, I thought I could write about my 3 darling teachers who made a difference to my life, to whom I owe a greater part of my success, to whom I shall always be indebt, to whom I shall always bow my head with love.

Vidwan Belur Narayan Tantri

He taught us Sanskrit in school and I was kinda scared of him. He was one of the strictest sirs in the campus and his class meant no fooling around (ah! Now you know why I was scared of him). He always wore a neatly pressed white shirt-full sleeves and a white panche and neatly oiled, combed hair.

I was never good at Sanskrit or understood half the subject matter or bothered to learn anything from the books or did well in the exams. I was in his class because he spoke about values, morals, religion and traditions and I loved listening to his elaborate explanations. His class was always rich with information on our heritage and rituals and I always clinged to every word he spoke.

He knew my aversion to the language and my reluctance to learn the subject. This Sir, of whom I was scared for all those years, whom I thought, disliked me for scoring less marks, called me one fine day before my 10th final exams and made a detailed plan to coach me. I was surprised beyond words and scared beyond death. For 1 month, under his strict supervision I really learnt Sanskrit for the first time, grammer, linga, sandhi and stuff. Our sessions were filled with interesting discussions, Indian history, hindu values and I was in love with this subject.

He spent time off this schedule to help me learn, knowing the reputation I had for being eh, not so easy student. I passed my board exams with a whooping 120/125, something I would not have dreamt in the luckiest of my dreams and Sir was the happiest. I remember bouncing to him with joy when the result was up and he gave me his best smile.

I owe much of my spiritual knowledge and religious beliefs to him. He unconsciously nurtured the traditional values in me, made me practice a few disciplines in life, respect my religion and be a better person. Everyday when I say my prayers to god, I remember him, because today I am able to understand the essence of these stotras and tell the, with all my heart.

“Dhanyawaada Shriman”

Prof.I.V.Rao

His students will always say that he is the best Sir under the sun but I could say that he himself is the sun to the students in the dark. A look at him and your heart fills with respect and love, such is his presence. His smiling face and graceful strides makes anyone aware of the powerful aura around him.

Sir teaches physics and I used to go to him for my physics tuitions for 2 years during my pre-university. For me, he taught me much more than just subject. He instilled in me the self-confidence when I needed it the most and stood by me when I had lost hope in myself. Such was his impact in my life.

He guided me even after my college, to select an area of study which was not much experimented in those days. I would always go to him with any doubts I had and just a talk with him made me feel geared up. We used to have lovely discussions on many topics, science, education, life and life after death, religion, many things. With Sir, I could talk for hours and yet have loads to tell him.

Even after 7 years, I rant nonchalantly about everything to sir and he always listens with a smile on his face. The animated me will tell stories about studies and work and Sir with laugh with me, a laugh about which I am dead crazy. For his 60th birthday, I was asked to write an article on him for a book to be published. I remember to have sat for hours with tears and not write a word. Those tears were of gratitude for this Sir who blessed my life with his trust.

As I called Sir today morning to wish him, he immediately recognized my voice. I was over joyed at his immediate response when I wished him. In spite of loosing his sight, Sir remembers each of his students and I was honored. I could never ask for a better blessing.

"I love you sir"

Sudha Baliga

I could say I was her first student. 8 years back she did not teach, I literally forced her upon the recommendation of some family friend to coach me for maths. Now, she runs a full-time tuition class filled with really bright students. ( I guess I was the dumbest of her lot)

She coached me for maths during my pre-university. Now, when I say maths, a chill runs down my spine and I get convulsions. So, it is understood that it was a Herculean task to get my count the numbers. And she did it with patience and love which made me forget the hatred I had for the subject and study it with tolerance.

She made me understand the subject so much so that we started from the 5th grade books, tables and basic maths. Everyday, she would patiently teach me many things over and over again and I would dutifully forget them the next day. I managed to study maths because I dint wanna disappoint her and did well in the exams for my standards. It was then I pledge never to touch another integration and calculus all my life, me or my kids.
(well, I ended up studying it for the next few years, HR and MBA).

Maths tuitions always came with chocolates and food and lunch and cats. Every year for my b’day I get whole lot of Temptations and a pen. This year she called me up to wish me and my bro said that she distributed sweets in the class. I was moved beyond words.

She trusted me when I was lost and guided me with love. More than maths, she taught me that plain and simple trust and a word of encouragement can make wonders to our lives. And she did to mine.

"Thank you ma’am"

Years have passed but I still remember my teachers with gratitude. A word of encouragement, a comforting hand, a smiling face and a trusting heart is all that made me what I am today. For me, I could not be more blessed than have their loved presence in my life.

They say that god created gurus to remind us of him. I shall never be able to repay any of my teachers who sailed me over these years. I may not be able to meet many of them ever again or thank them personally. But I shall bow my head with deep respect to every teacher in my life for their blessings.

Happy Teacher’s Day!!!

The man upstairs

2006-08-25T00:37:00.000+01:00

Mr. Tanhaaye was lazy this noon (as lazy as he always is) and I pulled him to sit next to me and browse through our mails in the yahoo mail folder. Yes, I share my id with those 3 fellas- tanhaaye, bloggy and peanut butter brainy, as they too have some friends around the cyber space, they say. In this way, it lets me keep a track of their brutish activities and the sole ownership of the password keeps them under my wing.

Anyway, I have been “yahooing” (I fancy using it as a verb) for almost 5 years now and Mr. patted my back on my display of some consistent relationship. Now, don’t the people in yahoo need to appreciate my loyalty and present me with some free trips to Niagara? *hmpf*

I came across this mail which I had posted for my Canara2k group sometime in ‘05. We had some theme writing stuff in the group and every member was brewing some real funny stories about our college days. This was one such story about my highly kleptomaniac college life.

Please note: The original post is preserved to bring out the original posted feelings. (if this makes any sense et al)

April 09, 2005.(the day this post was written. The incident must have happened sometime back in 1999 ?)

“nauv aapril, san doou saau paanch”- to give the filmy effects. Some ghodas running –tok tok, some haatis screaming- haaaan, some bandukes flying- bang bang.

As the theme for this month is funny moments in Canara* and the OwnerSaab hit one really nice incident about B section, I think C section** had its own fun filled days. Specially, since we had all the "rapchik item" lecturers.

Well, honestly saying I don’t have many memorable moments in the 2 years spent in Canara College but there are a few which still have me laugh flat on the ground at how dumb I was (it's a total different thing that the same dumbness still continues).

Rajesh Kamath*** used to take English class for us in the second year. A class where most of us could give some rest to our stressed brains and let the creases of our foreheads to relax. With hours of logs, maths, protons and chemicals grilling, even his pathetic PJ jokes were a welcome. The whole class used to laugh with such blissful vigor that made RK grin,
"man…aint I really funny??"

It was a phase of my life where everything was in a big- Big- BIG haze for me. I was some micro molecule short of being in a total zombie like state where I was not comprehending the 5W+1H of my life. (for the uninitiated, 5W+1H refers to that fundu principle those fundu journalists use: why, when, which, what, who, how) mostly because of the early tuition hours.

The poor owl’s soul in me was not used to winking awake at the crack of dawn and I had to rush to IV’s or Moody’s **** for tuitions and that was what I loathed the most. The result was the state of extreme trance in the class hours.

I had perfected the art of sleeping in the class with my eyes wide open. I really don’t know how I managed to sit in that state without being caught for a whole 2 years. Either the lecturers were too naïve to know or just decided to ignore me??? Whatever….

Back to business, it was one of RK's musically pitched English class and that too the lazy afternoon hour. I had got up very early that day as I had to complete Moody’s ‘imposition’ of writing some complex-complan molecular formula 100 times. So I was enjoying a peaceful afternoon siesta to the lori-fying voice.

The chapter in progress was "The Man Upstairs". If you guys remember, it was about some old man who was thought to be dead and his daughters dived into dividing his assets and all that kind of batwara stuff. Off late, RK was into an annoying habit of pairing the class in his own weird sense of humor. We didn't mind as long as we had some good laugh.

Now, RK was cracking up some really sad pj’s on "upstairs- honeymoon- bedroom" and the other similar crap. It was when my eyes decided on hibernating and taking no more idiosyncrasies. And unfortunately RK chose that very moment to pounce on me.

Kaveriappa(my fellow classmate) was the man upstairs in the bedroom. Whatever…I don't remember much of what was going on before I dozed off. But, what I do remember is that, RK, in a highly melodramatic voice asking me,

“Well Dharmu ! what were YOU doing upstairs??"
(the stress was on YOU)

Poor me, unaware of the happenings in the immediate surroundings, with really dreamy eyes said,

“Sir, I was sleeping”.

The whole class including RK burst out laughing at a pitch that must have scared the crows 1 mile away and I really dint know why? With a foolish look I turned around and saw a real pink-red-scarlet Kaveriappa giving me "the" look.

I kept wondering till the end of the hour, with a stupid question mark on my face, till my friends told me the whole sequence. I was so embarrassed that I totally avoided crossing Kaveriappa for the whole year. I don't know if he remembers this incident but I have “the look” he gave me so fresh in my mind that it still makes me "sharam se paani".

//Dampoo's guide for the non-canara junta//

*- The college where I did my pre-university. We had several sections for each combo and for PCMB; we had A-B-C section.
(Her highness belonged to the deemed C section)

**- Trust me, we had the most animated lecturers of the dept. There was also this trait of all not-so-studious-only-time pass students being in majority in this section.

***- RK was one Sir with some real weird sense of humor. He could not speak sense without juicing some underlying doubled meanings to any given matter at any given point of time. But, we student liked him as his class always roared with laughter.

**** - Prof.’s to whom majority of the Canara junta went for additional coaching. Er, this was the only place where we actually bothered to read something at all.

Aw, now I am a shade of scarlet, Damn that man upstairs!

Its about general nothings

2006-08-24T00:59:00.000+01:00

This post does not make sense, it dint make an ounce of sense to me and I assure you, it wont make any sense to you either. I highly recommend you avoid reading it and rather wipe you monitor screen clean.

Almost 4 days past the last post and HERO has no mood to write. No, not even the naan-sensical, highly unrelated ramblings she usually does with Hrithik's vigour. Every dead bone(yes, under all those newly accumulated flabs, she has bones) in her body is as lazy as the rhino in the pool on a hot summer noon.

At this given time, when the sun is shining, birds are chirping, frogs are croaking, those 3 fellas, Tanhayee, Bloggy and Peanut butter brain are snoring to glory with the dreams of Bipasha, dripping wet in that white gown from Jism. I heard that they have a mega thing about Bips, and lemme tell you, I don’t care. I have this thing about that John Abraham dude and Harley. I am still nuts about it.

If you think I was hibernating for the past four days, nope, you are wrong. I was counting the hair in my neighbor’s nose, coloring the hair of a cat, making random calls to random strangers- asking about their opinion on Air India flight schedules and planning the budget for Somalia.

Ok, I am a jerk, I agree but did you really take this l-o-n-g to guess??? I am horrified. Jeez..

Last weekend, I spent a whole day at the zoo with 4 other friends, running wild and getting tandoori tanned under the sun. SD zoo is supposed to be one of the best maintained zoos in US and I was really impressed. Everything looked tamed but me. But the sad part was that most of the animals were snoring to glory when I called upon them. Poor me, I was sadly deprived of making funny faces at them.
*sniff sniff*

Last evening I slept from 6 pm to 7am today morning with 30 mins waking time to drink milk. Now, talk about having sleeping as a hobby. I truly hope I get a husband who will encourage such self-indulging activities and keep the dining table spread with mouth watering dishes when I get up for my 30mins break. Even better if he will feed me, pyaar se- apne haaton se- goodi mein bithake.
If you know any such sharif ladka, do lemme know, er btw I am a vegetarian please.

I have been busy the whole day taking some random online psychology tests. I must tell you that it confirmed about me having some shredded traits of mental disorder. Not that I was in any doubt about my “special” abilities but it feels good when a standardized module agrees with you.
Last seen, I was playing ‘bheege hont’ on the harp on the cloud 9 and also managed to make a few Govinda moves.

I have suddenly taken a fancy to the Google Translation tools. Many of my friends have been targeted with some random german- french- italian- spanish mails. Some of them bothered to mail back with equally senseless matter and I made a mental note of my friends same-to-same with my IQ. Please don’t wince if you get one such nerve jerking fanatical mail and please be courteous enough to mail me back. I believe in the power of communication, whole heartedly.

For people who are planning to take a vacation touring India, do lemme know. I have a decent travel plan drafted for Agra (7days), Khajraho(5days) and Lakshadweep(10days).
I have also mailed the travel agency to quote the prices and details which I will be glad to share with the interested junta. Nope, I am not making travel arrangements for my honeymoon, I hate honey.
It’s just that I like to travel and one darling friend (I hope the Kaup beach promise still holds good) mentioned about these places and I decided to make a complete planning project on them. If any one wants details on any other places, do mail me.
Things I do to keep myself from been hysterically home sick.

Owing to some insensitive display of unappreciated behaviors of certain individuals, repeatedly over a period of time, her Highness has decided to overlook certain things around her, be indifferent and dedicate her entire time and self to herself and her self-indulging activities. This truly means that she will spend more time writing stuff and keeping Mr.Blog on his toes. Warning the junta to remain protected against my unrelated ramblings.

I donno why, I miss my Ma a lot today. *sigh*

Games HERO played

2006-08-19T00:24:00.000+01:00

Long long ago I was a kid. I was this sweet, innocently cute, delightfully enduring, sugarly pretty li’l girl. I know it’s hard to believe, but trust me I was one. No, I really was one.

*gives a eyelid fluttering smile, like that of daisy duck*

OK, I was joking.

I did mention it in this post that I spent the best of my summer vacations in Thirthahalli, a small village nuzzling on the banks of river Tunga. We have our paternal ancestral home (ajjimane) there and every vacation saw 6 hyper cousins (3 guyz-3 gals) growing together in each other’s company. It was fun to have 2 anna’s (elder bros) bossing you, a akka (elder sis) doting on you, and 2 more insane brats of your age loving you and that wonderful feeling of being a ‘family’.

We also had some good company of the neighboring kids (all guys) of our age who mastered some ‘out-door’ activities. You could read it as a total rolly-polly gang of untamed kids, eager to vent out their energy on unmonitored activities. Exceptions were the two couz sisters of mine who never ventured out to learn the blissful brutish activities.

Under the stern guidance of these guys I mastered a few gully games. I did play with Barbies, kitty house, dolls too, but these gully games have been the best ‘la memoria’ of my childhood. (Peanut butter brain insisted on retaining the local names of games)

AIS-PIES

This is a desi-version of hide-and-seek, where all hide and the seeker tries to locate the hidden people. Our ajjimane had loads of dark corners and hiding was never a problem. We could stand behind any pillar or door or even hide under the chair for that matter. But each one was equally scared of sitting behind the dark corners as much as the seeker was scared to come looking for us.

Once, one of my couz rolled himself in the carpet and fell asleep. We looked for him and later, ruled him out. Poor fellow got up after hours having terrible cramps in his legs.

KHAMBAATA

On the first floor was a long hall and here, for reasons known only to the great grand taatas (some great grandpa was supposed to planned the house) we had several pillars. There would be one seeker and the rest would run between the pillars, changing places. It was a quite stupid game as there were so many pillars and we would fight over them.

LA’GORI

Nope, it’s not a French game. We have seven stones placed on each other making a pyramid, 2 teams and one rubber ball. One team will hit the pyramid and try to build it again; the other team will try to hit the rubber ball to the opp team’s legs. The whole funda sounds so weird.
Why break the pyramid in the first place?

KALLA-POLICE

Meaning ‘robber-police’ and this was one decent game which we placed without destruction and running down the place. This game was mostly played after lunch. We made chits of different titles like king- queen- mantri- thief- police and the police had to guess the robber. We had some points for this game which I don’t remember now.

JUUTAATA

It is the simple run & catch game. We usually played it on the river banks and had many versions of this one running affair. Sometimes we just ran without knowing who the catcher was.
Similar games: lock & key, Poison-poison, chain.
Er, we were nuts I tell you.

FISHING

Nope, we didn’t have any fancy rods or boats. All we had was a bath towel which we spread under the water and collected the fishes in the bottle. The whole tedious process was enjoyed for hours and the goody li’l us, always put the fishes back into the water.
(Else, grandma would throw a fit)

BRIDGE CONNECTION

This has been one of my favorite to this date and we cousins gleefully jump into this even now. The bank of the river is covered with shiny sand which is digged to form small “wells”. Each one digs a well of his own and makes a connection with other wells. After the whole process which takes a good deal of 3-4 hrs, we all jump into the connected wells. The whole affair is dead messy and trust me when I say our nails hurt.
Sometimes, we covered this pit with leaves and twigs and hoped someone would fall into it.

PULTI

This is outrageously stupid. We had a dedicated room at our disposal, where the mattress was spread from wall-to-wall. We would roll leg-over-head, head-over-leg like the circus monkey all over the room. This was some fun.

TYRE RACE

Simple game. Take a cycle tyre, take a stick, race the tyre with the stick and run along the unpaved roads. A total fun game when 7-8 kids run behind each other racing their tyres. Er, it was done on barefoot. Talk about being a girl.

CHATTERBILLI

We fancied carrying a catapult in our back pockets all the time and aiming it randomly at anything that caught our eye. I must say, I had a very good aim when it came to streetlights and I was a proud dame among those guys.

KALLU RIPPLE

You take a flat stone, aim it right on the surface of the water and let it jump or kind of bounce. This needs loads of practice and a very good grip on the throwing style. Also, one must have the eye to choose the right flat stone. I was very good at this with my average being 3 ripples but last year when I tried, the stone just gulped down. Looks like I have lost my touch.

DOUBLE DECKER DOONI

Boat making was a talent practiced and perfected with time. Double decker boat was a hot favorite as it sailed longer during the boat race. We always stuck to the local newspaper to make these boats had some fancy names too.

BENKI KADDI

This was one more game requiring some practice. One had to flip the matchstick with his thumb and forefinger and light it. However, we never tired it on our tongues.

PIRATES

We had a bed sized ‘jhula’ which served as our ship. We were the pirates and waged many wars against unknown soldiers. Ok, this was really dumb but I wonder how we played all morning, acting like pirates?

FRUITY

We had this huge bridge across the river. We would throw the empty fruity box from one side and calculate the time it would take to reach the other. I know this is not a game, but what the heck, we dutifully did it almost every day.

JARBANDI

On the banks was this one huge rock (bande kallu) which acted as our slide. We would rub all the available leaves on the rock to make it smooth and slide endlessly. Every night our back side reported some miserable burning. These days the rock slide is really smooth and I think we did a good job then.

We did play many more games which I don’t recall much now. But each minute of those fun-filled days gave me a childhood which I will never get back. Those days spent with my cousins have taught me some very essential lessons of life, to love, to share, to care, to adjust, to learn and to laugh.

I guess, none of our next generation will ever get these joyful days. These days where the chip games are much more favored than the olden days of simple games, I think the whole spirit of playing together; laughing at simple things, sharing love with cousins has changed.

As I type this, I remember my cousins, one- growing up again with his li’l daughter, one- happily cuddling her new born angel, one- enjoying the bliss of his newly married life, one- busy coding and decoding some of his nerdy bug, one- just stepping into her professional life, and one- me, missing them like crazy.

Some out-standing student uh?

2006-08-18T00:27:00.000+01:00

Its 2.15 on a normal thursday afternoon and I am in the office. After a hearty meal and a siesta in the park, I fruitfully use this time to check my mails and random forwards. Those fwds- which needs to be sent to other 10 jobless friends hoping that you will find your true love before 12 that night, or you will be haunted with bad luck and your son won't find his gf. It’s a nice routine I follow as it peps my mood to work later ( yes, I do work between the breaks), you see.

Anyway, I got this mail from a friend today about some article in Business Times. Yes, it’s that magazine, which every management student fancily carries all over the campus but never reads, which gives glossy numbers for companies, which helps us to draft a few heavy weight presentations making no sense to anyone, and never to forget, gives a listing of all the top business schools and companies.

As a student I was a regular reader of such magazines and used most of the un-understanding stuff for my management competitions. I realized that not much people argued or commented when I presented some bhari-bharkam numbers as a reference and judges always gleamed with satisfaction. Also, it was a silent weapon against the fellow presenters. "These are my figures dude, where are your's?" This practice earned me much of my trophies displayed proudly in my living room back in Mlore. So this mail from my friend brought back a wonderful memory from my uni days.

*me is seen giving a far-sighted mellow look- eyes watery- picture ripples- faint music in the background*

The date was sept 11 and year 2003. I was in my first semester of MBA. Prof. Sridhar was giving lectures on principles and practices of management. (Yawn) It was thirty minutes past ten in the morning, the first session of the day. I was dead sleepy after my mid-night movie session of Basant Bahar(Thanks dad!).

Prof. was known for his calm and patient attitude towards his students. He had some fundu degree from Japan, was a resource person for some hifi companies and stuff. He has a record of not raising voices or throwing students out of class in his 30 years of blissfull teaching life. Well, excluding a senior who was asked to leave the class, Prof has a clean record with students, especially with the female crowd. He was our definition of “cool dude sir”. A must mention is that I had this mega sized thing for this Prof coz I was hoping on him being my guide for my PhD.

Back to the classroom, the lecture was so boring that even the bacteria in my nose were drowsing. Not to blame them. BT had released their new issue of “50 best companies to work for” which had me drooling head-to-toe hoping to land in one of such big names. Infact, I was dreaming of me walking around in a suit and attending board room meetings soon. (Now, I could kick my arse for such dreams, I loathe board room meetings) People in the bus did give me stares when I took the seat in the same way as Bips in Corporate. I liked that movie and specially her make-up less face. She looks chick.

Uh, back to topic. There I was sitting in the first row, the first girl, right under the nose of Prof. reading the BT and making notes. My strategic location was so close that I could measure the length of his beard hair and count the grey from black.I guess Prof realized my minutes taking only when I had covered the best part of the 45 companies. The usually pink sir turned to a shade of maroon. And the usual fair me turned to a shade of scarlet. Aila! Shade card for Asian Paints?

With a soft and stern voice sir said, “Can you please find a different place to complete that book?” (in exact words) and I dutifully walked out with complete poise and grace. The same way I would have walked from a boardroom meeting, wearing a Armani suit and carrying a leather lappy case. I must say I was nervous coz it was my first time in uni. Er, forgot to mention that being thrown out from class was my part-time hobby from school days, I have been a OUT-standing student.

So, under the shade of the tree I completed the book, made notes for the next upcoming competition and drafted the presentations. After 2 hours, I went to Prof, apologized (me to him, him to me, it was mutual) and we both discussed the same presentation. After all, he was my guide when I had any doubts for my topics and we laughed over the whole thing. He was in mixed feelings coz I broke his perfect clean record and I tried to console him. I know, I can get on nerves.

The best part came later in the noon when my seniors came to know of this. I was treated for almost a week in the canteen for this record breaking performance. Since I was very fond of this sir, they found it all the more amusing. Er, I could add that it boosted my brat image to a greater extent.

It was then, 3 years back when I was a irresponsible, immature student. I must say I still laugh at this incident when I think of it. I was such a nuisance, ok, I am even now, but then I was worse. But this Prof has been one of my all time favorites and I just adore him. He has given me some valuable insights for my studies and career. It was under his persuasion that I did my MS in psychotherapy. (I guess he thought I needed it badly).

Sadly enough, it was the last time I enjoyed being a out-standing student coz later, I never turned in for most of the classes. I was one among the guest student category excelling in the 'bunk-thy-class-to-thy-heart' category. Jeez...I miss being a student.

I have "pen-se-mania"

2006-08-17T01:03:00.000+01:00

I was writing this letter to a friend today. Haan, the typical type ka, which starts with “hope you are found in pink/green/blue of health” and ends with “convey my regards to uncle, aunty, bunty, billi and your doggy raju”. Not that I had to discuss some GDP growth issues of Somalia or review the dress patterns of Rani in the movie KANK or for that matter the dal prices in US.

It was a simple letter to do some show-off with my pretty writing which I hope the friend in question will ogle at, use some fundu words and also use the stamps which lay forsaken in my desk. As a school going girl I had this craze for writing letters and dutifully wrote letters every month to every cousin of mine. Now we just e-mail each other (only) when the need arises.

Sorry, I will not discuss my letter writing madness here, but this is about an observation I made. I always had this thing about using the right pen. I have always been very choosey about the pens I use and will never compromise with my “hand” on writing. It’s like John Abraham being choosey about his roles (as I have heard from some glossy magazine). Well, I have this thing for John too.

Give the right pen and I will keep my mouth shut (quite surprising?), take a corner seat and write to glory about all possible things under the sun-moon-Pluto till my fancy for the pen wears off. Nope, I don’t mean a high labeled designer pen, but a nice decent writing pen.

I like a pen to fit snugly into the curve of my thumb and forefinger, the grasp being just right on the middle finger, very sleek and light and which will draw strokes like, er Dravid ? I specially like it when it leaves a classy mark on the white paper. I am dead particular of my writing style too, it being long cursive, slightly slanted to the right.
As a studious, dedicated student (ok, you can stop laughing) I always used an ink pen. I had the best collection of ink pens in my class and never shared it with anyone. I had this belief that every pen has a life of its own and it would follow its master’s style of writing. So, according to me, my pen would be used to my style of writing and sharing it with some random classmate would confuse the pen and later my pen will not write properly.
Ok, I know it does not make sense, but that what I thought as a kid, er, even now.

I must say that the obsession for the pens runs in my family. My ma is very fond of pens and I think she herself is a moving pen store. On a normal digging into her purse one can count a min of 8-9 pens. She will even buy 10 pens for Rs10 type ka on trains. And my dad is a stickler for clean writing. He can sit for hours to neatly draft the pages and I got all my writing “hand” from him. I never write as neatly as him but I am really proud of my cursive “hand”. My bro is a total different story which we can avoid here but he does have a decent writing. (oh, the love for bro makes me tell things so untrue)

I am not very attached to ball point pens as they don’t co-operate with my writing style. Reynolds 045 can be tolerated but otherwise I will not accept any TDH pens. I particularly like the gel pens as they give somewhat similar strokes like that of ink pen. Student gel has been my favorite for the past 5 years now and I had packed a good stock of refills when coming to US.

My best prized possession to date is my HERO pen which my dad gave me when I was in my 5th std. This happens to be his pen from his college days of early 70’s. It is one sleek black pen with a golden cap, a golden arrow on top, genuine 22k gold tip nib and inscribed delicately is ‘made in China’.

I could also mention that I had a dedicated ritual once in every 3 months called the 'pen cleaning session'. All my ink pens were neatly emptied, opened to every bit, soaked in a mug of cold soapy water, brushed delicately and dried on a cotton towel. The nibs were washed separately to avoid scratches. Later using a ear drop filler, perfectly to the brim my pens were treated with Bril ink ( I never used any other ink, it always had to be bril. I did try camlin and chelpark but bril royal blue rocked.)

My trysts with ink pens came much to halt when my pen accidentally stabbed into my left palm and my palm oozed blue blood. I guess for a month I was paranoid about using ink pens but later grew off it. Although I threw that pen in question into the well and watched it drown with a satisfied smirk on my face.

I am highly superstitious about the pens I use. Like; I have a pen which is used solely for the exam purpose and I just change its refill. And one black pen to sign all the important papers given by my Ma for my bday. There is one pen which was given to me by my teacher which I always use for presentations.

But with the use of computers, the use of pen is abandoned to a great extent. I miss those days when I would look out for new models and save every bit of my pocket money to buy it. I also miss the feeling of writing long letters, notes, answers, exams and having that bliss of seeing curvy strokes of blue ink on white paper. *sigh*

Pen speaks: in hindi movies there is always a power cut off or a sad music or the nib snips cut when the hero signs some dhokeywaala papers. Any say on this ?

Happy Independence Day !

2006-08-14T19:27:00.000+01:00

India
Date: August 15, 2006
Local Time: 12:00a.m.

San Diego
Date: August 14, 2006
Local Time: 11.30a.m.

India
For 23 years, I associated this date with flag hoisting early in the morning, ironed Guides dress for the flag service, cultural programs in school, patriotic songs on TV, tri-color flag flying high on every building, hanging out with friends and holiday.

San Diego
For the first time in my life, miles away from my country, I realize that this day is not about holidays or celebrations. Its about feelings, it’s about patriotism, it’s about belonging, it’s about pride, it’s about sacrifice and it’s about our motherland.

May the tri-color always fly high, Vande Maatharam !

Added later:Kya hua if we are not in India, Rashmi & Me went to the park near the office and sang the national anthem, 'jana gana mana' in complete raag and taal and a heart filled with pride. We also managed to sing a few desh bhakti geet, ok, a few sentences atleast and I must say, it felt good.

Also, I follow the Indian dress week, which means "thou shalt wear only thy traditonal dresses to thy office".